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PTSD Versus I-Am-Needy

, , , , , , | Right | March 17, 2022

My spouse and I are walking through the clothing section when a lady calls out to us, pointing to my spouse.

Customer: “Hey, you! Where can I find these pants in a size fourteen?”

Spouse: “Sorry, I don’t work here. I think there’s an employee by the dressing rooms.”

We continue walking.

Customer: “Hey! Hey! Get back here! I’m not done talking to you!”

I turn around, unfortunately just in time to see the lady grab my spouse’s arm.

Me: “Lady, wait—”

Too late. My spouse shrieks, grabs the lady, and throws her over them onto the floor. They back up afterward, muttering apologies all the while.

Customer: “Ow! F***! The a**hole threw me!”

Me: “My spouse already said they don’t work here! And even if they did, you shouldn’t be grabbing employees, much less ones who are combat veterans!”

While I was trying to comfort my spouse, the commotion attracted the attention of several actual employees, who subsequently called security. After questioning all of us, they determined that my spouse was acting in self-defense, and they and I were free to go. While the customer was able to get up and walk, she was taken to medical services anyway.

I thought that would be the end of it, but a month later, we received a notice from the customer’s lawyer that she was trying to charge us for assault due to the incident. Thankfully, the store was more than willing to provide security footage and witness accounts to prove otherwise, and the case was dropped.

From Fire And Brimstone To Rainbows

, , , , , , , | Friendly | December 3, 2021

Back in college, there was a very loud religious advocacy group that would visit campus, set up their speakers, and “preach” the gospel to the students passing by. Now, I say “preach” because it was less “Glory to God who loves you!” and more “You’re all going to Hell because of who you are! Change your minds or burn!”

One such day, they set up right outside our performance center. It was obviously intentional, as a majority of the performance majors were part of the LGBT community, and the theater majors were not happy about having their space taken over. I had a class in the building behind the performance center, so I walked by the crowd gathering.

One of the advocates had a mic in one hand and was holding hands with a young woman I have seen in a few theater productions. The advocate seemed to be praying while the young woman stood there, half-smiling and nearly crying.

Advocate: “Lord, help this girl see the error of her ways! Help her, God, to see that her homosexual fornications are not what you want for her, but that she is here to bear children with a man, to love his family, to—”

Young Woman: *With a very dramatic tone* “Lord! You died for me!”

Surprised, the advocate shook her arm almost violently.

Advocate: “Yes… Yes, He did! He did die for you! The Lord loves you, child! Spread the word!”

The advocate passed his mic to the young woman, who stepped forward proudly.

Young Woman: “Jesus died for the gays! He loves us!”

There was a cheer from the crowd. The advocate dropped her hand and glared at her. I don’t know what he was trying to say because he was drowned out by the screaming crowd. The young woman took a bow and walked away. I went on my way to class, but when I came back, the advocacy group had packed up and left campus. They came back a few more times over the years and the message never changed, but I don’t think they tried to openly save anyone after that.

Well, Her Heart Is In The Right Place

, , , , , , | Learning | October 6, 2021

In college, a friend asks me to be a part of his film project. In the project, we follow a woman (me) and her husband as he goes down the path of addiction and back through recovery. We set up in an alley and start filming my husband drinking from a bottle in a paper bag. 

Me: “I thought I’d find you here.”

Husband: “F*** off.”

Me: “Why don’t you go get help?”

A woman walking by sees us and comes over.

Woman: “Hey! Leave him alone!”

Me: “What? Oh, no, no—”

Woman: “I said leave him alone! I’ll smack the stupid right outta you!”

Husband: “Ma’am, it’s fine. We—”

Woman: “You do not have to put up with these… fake-do-good b****es.”

Our friend, who has been standing nearby filming, finally steps in.

Friend: “Ma’am, please listen, he’s not—”

Woman: “He’s clearly a man in distress and you’re filming him!”

Friend: “No, he’s fine. He—”

Woman: “He ain’t fine!” *To my homeless “husband”* “Come on, sweetie. Let’s get you something to eat.”

Husband: “Um… this is a class project.”

The woman stands there, silent, looking at all of us. 

Woman: “A class project for what?”

Friend: “For [College]. I’m a film major.”

The woman seems at a loss, but then she rallies.

Woman: “Well… You can’t just go up to homeless people and put them in your—”

Husband: “I’m acting!”

Woman: “Oh. Well… you… are doing a fine job. Just don’t be out here long. Other folks won’t be so nice about you bothering the homeless.”

Friend: “Right. Thanks.”

We finished within an hour, and while other people did stop and ask what we were doing, nobody else was quite like that woman.

From Off The Shelf To Straight Down Your Throat

, , , , , | Right | June 8, 2021

I work in a high-end department store. As such, customers can be a little… particular. This is fine, though, as we are used to it and can handle it well. One woman comes in and chooses some very expensive sunglasses. This happens as I’m checking her out.

Customer: “And I would like a fresh pair from the back.”

Me: “Of course, ma’am. Let me go check that we have them.”

I go through our stock, but the only extra pair is also out on the shelf. I bring the extra pair to the register in case she likes the condition of these more. But before I can get a word in, she barks at me:

Customer: “I just saw what you did! You just took those off the shelf!”

Me: “I did, ma’am. These are the only two pairs I have left, but we can easily order you a brand new one if you like.”

Customer: *Grumbles* “Fine, order it.”

I cancel the transaction and start an order when she suddenly speaks up again.

Customer: “No. You know what? Cancel everything. I don’t want them. I saw what you did. I won’t take a used pair!”

She stormed off. I assume she thought I was trying to pass the other pair off as the new pair, but she jumped down my throat before I could explain and then didn’t seem to believe me anyway when I did. Some people can never be pleased.

A Most Unreceptive Receptionist, Part 11

, , , , , | Working | May 28, 2021

My husband got home two weeks ago from spending two months in the hospital. We gave the hospital and doctor’s office our home phone number instead of his cell phone. He has a dozen follow-up appointments scheduled with many different departments, not to mention four different departments of in-home nurses calling and coming all throughout the week. Our phone is ringing off the hook. To let him rest as much as possible, I handle all the calls and scheduling of appointments.

He receives this call on his cell phone, which is listed as the non-primary number.

Husband: “Hello?”

The lady speaks without any introduction or greeting or anything.

Lady: “You want to cancel your appointment?”

Husband: “What?”

Lady: “You want to cancel your appointment?”

Husband: “Who is calling? Which appointment?”

Lady: “This is [Doctor]’s office.”

He gets me on the phone and she repeats which office she’s calling from. Unfortunately, my husband has eight new doctors that want follow-ups, and in the chaos, I didn’t grab my notes. It takes five minutes of me asking what department this doctor is in and me guessing upcoming appointments I have memorized for her to answer.

Lady: “I am with [department]. So, you want to cancel tomorrow’s appointment?”

Me: “No! We need this appointment! Why would we want to cancel?”

Lady: “We received a voicemail from you.”

It finally clicks. Two weeks ago, when my husband was first released, I called this office to MOVE the appointment. I left a detailed message repeating that, if possible, we wanted to move it one day, when we’ll be coming back to that same building for another appointment. I left my name and my number. 

Me: “No. I left a message two weeks ago. After not getting a call back, I called again. This is already resolved.”

Lady: “You want to cancel?”

Me: “No! We wanted to move it to Wednesday because we’ll already be in [building] that day, but the doctor isn’t there Wednesday.”

Lady: “We could move it to Thursday.”

Me: “That doesn’t help because we’ll be there on Wednesday. We’ll keep this appointment.”

Lady: “What about next week?”

Around and around and around we went for five more minutes until I could convince her that this was already resolved. And for those wondering, my husband is doing great!

A Most Unreceptive Receptionist, Part 10
A Most Unreceptive Receptionist, Part 9
A Most Unreceptive Receptionist, Part 8
A Most Unreceptive Receptionist, Part 7
A Most Unreceptive Receptionist, Part 6