Right Working Romantic Related Learning Friendly Healthy Legal Inspirational Unfiltered

Great stories from our entire backlog!

Making A Graceful Exit

| Working | December 19, 2014

(A few days before Thanksgiving, my 6’5″ husband and I (tall as well) are on a long trip back to our home in Europe from a trade show in Las Vegas. Our time at the show was fraught with embarrassment and financial peril, as both our East Coast as well as our German credit cards from a major card company are randomly accepted or denied, even within the same hotel. We therefore have resorted to using cash whenever possible. At the airport, my husband is dealing with back pain, and at the gate we try to upgrade our plane seats to Economy Plus with much needed leg room. The agent at the gate is slightly flustered with handling a packed and overbooked flight, but keeping her cool:)

Agent: “Yes, I can give you two exit row seats if that is okay with you. That would be $204.”

Husband: *looking way happier* “Yes, please!”

Me: “Can we pay in cash?”

Agent: “I’m sorry, I may not take cash here, and you cannot get prepaid credit cards in this area of the airport.”

(I explain our credit card and authorization woes, and warn her that they might fail, but to please try them. While she attempts to run all our cards, Husband and I chat that we just will have to take it as it comes with the cards, and hope for the best.)

Me: *noticing the people on the waiting list nearby* “You know, at least we will BE on the flight and get home, with or without the upgrade. I’m glad for that. If we can only pay for one upgraded seat, you’re getting it!”

Agent: “It looks like this [last] card might be authorizing, but the system is acting up again. It won’t let me assign the seats to you!”

Me: “Oh, dear. Did the card fail after all?”

Agent: “I don’t think so. This is the third time today the system is doing this. I’ll try this a couple more times, and if it doesn’t assign, I’ll waive the fee.”

Husband: *in German* “What did she say? Is she serious?”

Me: *in German* “She might be joking. I don’t know. Let’s just wait.”

Agent: “Okay. That does it. I am done with seating system. I am waiving the fee and manually assigning you the seats. Here are your new boarding cards!”

(Shocked and grateful, we shake her hand and thank her profusely. The waiting list people got on the plane, too, on our vacated seats! Airline agent, if you are reading this, you saved us a lot of pain on the long flight home to Thanksgiving with our family there! Thank you so much, and happy Thanksgiving to you, too!)

Someone Will Scream For The Wrong Ice Cream

| Right | June 24, 2014

(A customer comes in, looking a little tired. I’m stacking shelves.)

Customer: “Hi, I need some vanilla Häagen-Dazs. Where are your freezers?”

Me: “They’re over here, but I’m afraid I think we’re out of Häagen-Dazs. We have our own brand vanilla.”

(He gives me a look like he’s going to cry.)

Customer: “I’m really sorry. It has to be Häagen-Dazs. It has to be vanilla.” *voice cracking* “Do you know where I could get some?”

(I promised to go and check the store room as he genuinely looked like he was about to burst into tears and I thought maybe he wasn’t very well. Luckily, we had a couple left that hadn’t been brought out. I brought it back and handed it to him. He looks at it like it’s magical, breathes a huge sigh of relief, and heads to the check out. He picks up a mini chocolate cake on the way and I see him talk to my colleague behind the counter. After he’s gone, she comes over to me and hands me the cake.)

Coworker: “That guy just said this is for you. He said he’s going home to his eight-month pregnant monster wife and because of you he’s not going to be murdered tonight.”

Drowning Hamster Requires Mouse To Mouse

| Right | December 4, 2013

(The small rodents are stored in aquariums with screen tops. A customer comes in and looks over the hamster tank.)

Me: “Is there anything I can help you with today, ma’am?”

Customer: “Yeah, what kinda fish dis be here?”

Me: “Ma’am, that’s not a fish. That is a hamster.”

Customer: “What kinda fish is a hamster? Is it one of the ocean things?”

Me: “Ma’am, hamsters are rodents. They are not any species of fish.”

Customer: “Where’s its water?”

Me: “In the bottle hanging on the side, right there.”

Customer: “You mean dat poor thing can’t even get in the water? What kind of place be keepin’ fish dat ain’t even in water? I ain’t spendin’ my money here. That’s cruelty. Shame on you!”

(The customer storms out of the store indignantly. I’m still confused.)

Hard Of Hearing For Hard Customers

| Right | October 22, 2014

(I’m deaf in one ear and hard of hearing in the other. Since I’ve been like this all my life, I’ve learned to adjust as well as I could. I have a habit of tilting my head and leaning in with my good ear. Most people don’t say anything or don’t even notice. I was serving this customer when this happened.)

Me: “Welcome to [Store]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “I want a…” *mumbles while looking down*

Me: “I’m so sorry. I didn’t catch that.”

Customer: *looks annoyed and mumbles it again*

Me: “Ma’am, I’m sorry. I’m hard of hearing, and I just can’t catch what you’re saying. Would you speak up just a bit, again I’m sorry.”

(She finally looks up and rolls her eyes.)

Customer: “What, they actually hire you people now?”

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Customer: “If you can’t hear like a normal person then you shouldn’t be working!”

Me: *starting to get upset* “I’m sorry you feel that way, but I like working, and since I can work, I’d rather do that than go on disability.”

Customer: “Well since you can work just soooo well, then I guess you heard my order. And I’m not repeating it.”

Me: “I didn’t hear it ma’am, and I don’t really want to just take a guess at your order.”

Customer: *very loudly* “Then get me another server, you freak!”

(Luckily my manager overheard and escorted her out, telling her not to come back. Thankfully, most people are actually really nice about it, and will just speak up.)

Sometimes You Want To Go Where Everybody Has A Name

, , | Right | April 20, 2009

Me: “Hello, thank you for calling [Company]. This is Bryan, may I have your account number?”

Customer: “Bryan who?”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, for security purposes I’m unable to provide you with my last name. For reference, I can provide you my ID number.”

Customer: “That won’t do, you need to have a last name. I can’t speak to someone without a last name. Make one up please, for my sake.”

Me: “…Okay, for the purposes of this call my name is Bryan Jones.”

Customer: “Thank you, Mr. Jones. I…”

(My name isn’t Jones.)