I am a waitress in a Mexican restaurant. We have so few alcohol sales that a few months before this, we gave up our liquor distributor license. We don’t sell enough alcohol to pay for the registration and hassle.

I’m seating a couple and getting them started.

Me: “And anything to drink tonight?”

Wife: “I’ll have a margarita.”

Me: “We don’t sell alcohol. All our drinks are virgin, so is a virgin margarita okay?”

Wife: *Sighing dramatically* “What other options do I have?”

I list other options including water, horchata, soft drinks, and some other mocktails and non-alcoholic beers.

Wife: “Fine, I’ll have the virgin margarita.”

Later, after I’ve brought out their drinks, they flag me down.

Wife: “I am tasting this margarita, and I think it has alcohol. I specifically requested a virgin.”

Me: “Ma’am, I can assure you that your drink is virgin.”

Wife: “I am tasting alcohol. I think your bartender messed up.”

Me: “We don’t have a bartender, as we don’t have alcohol. I mixed the drink myself.”

Wife: “I tasted alcohol. There is alcohol, and my drink should be virgin. I want the drink taken off my bill.”

Me: “There is no alcohol on the premises. It is impossible for there to be alcohol in your drink.”

Wife: “I say that there’s alcohol in this drink. You must have forgotten to tell them that I wanted a virgin.”

Me: “Ma’am, there is no alcohol in it. There is no alcohol anywhere in the building.”

She asked to speak to the manager, who backed me up. She ended up paying but then wrote a review about how her drink had alcohol when she specifically requested a virgin.

I live in a small town. Everyone recognizes everyone even if they don’t know their names, eventually. This employee has worked cashiering and food prep at a restaurant for more than a year at the same place. She sucks at taking direction but not usually enough to complain about. I go there about twice a month, and it’s always her.

I prefer a burger with a certain specialty bread but found last time that the bread turns into goo and snot with the normal mayonnaise, which is the only sauce for that burger.

Me: “I’ll have a [burger], no mayo.”

Employee: *Dramatic sigh* “Just say ‘no sauce’!”

Me: *Surprised* “Uh, okay. No sauce.”

The burger is slathered with ketchup and it is an AWFUL taste, because I don’t know anyone who wants their bacon dipped in ketchup, and because the bread was liquified during transit. I throw it away. A couple of weeks later, I decide to be more specific.

Me: “I’ll have [burger], no mayo, no ketchup, no mustard—”

As I’m listing, the same employee interrupts me with a major attitude problem. 

Employee: *Angry, almost yelling* “You don’t have to list everything! Obviously! Just say, ‘No sauce!’ And [burger] only comes with mayonnaise!”

Me: *Matching her tone, but louder to speak over her in return* “Apparently, I do, since last time I got a ball of ketchup and snot with bacon instead of a [burger]! Now as. I. Was. Saying. No mayo, no ketchup, no mustard, no teriyaki, no ranch, nothing liquid in the burger. Only the [solid/non-sauce ingredients]. Or as someone here who prefers to language-police everything told me, ‘No sauce.’”

Employee: *Embarrassed, quieter* “Oh, uh, so… Whatever!”

Whereas before, that employee would hand off the food, on my approach, she stomps off. Her manager passes me the container.

Manager: “Sorry about that. Uh, we are still training her…”

Me: *Still kind of pissed* “In what world does ‘no sauce’ mean ‘slather this in ketchup even though that’s not normally on it’? And why is it okay to shout over people like that? She has worked here for more than a year, so it sounds to me like she is either beyond teaching or intentionally defiant.”

The burger was correct. The next time I came by, a different person was handling orders, and I haven’t had any problems since then. I asked after her and was told she was moved to janitorial duties since she couldn’t be trusted cashiering or in food prep.

We have an open kitchen so customers can see and talk to the cook. Typically, there’s only one cook per shift. I am hard of hearing, and if you’ve ever worked near a vent-a-hood system, you’ll know they are incredibly loud.

A table of ten walks in and I get their order and start cooking. I’m incredibly busy trying to make sure everything gets done at the same time and doesn’t burn and nothing is forgotten or left out.

Another two guys order at the counter. One guy decides to start whistling at me like you’d whistle at a dog to get them to come over. I ignore him because I’m busy, getting mad, and honestly have no interest in what he wants to say to me. Have a problem or question? Talk to your waitress; I’m obviously busy. When the whistling doesn’t work, he starts saying:

Customer: “Hey, you, cook! Come here, girl.”

He is still talking as if to a dog.

Waitress: “Do you need anything, sir?”

Customer: “What’s the cook’s name?”

Waitress: “Oh, it’s [My Name]. Is there anything I can get you or tell her for you?”

He then ignores her question and continues calling at me like a dog, alternating between calling me “cook” and something that isn’t my name.

Customer’s Friend: “Hey, man, chill out. She’s obviously busy, and if you need something you can talk to the waitress.”

The first guy simply continues ignoring his buddy and the waitress while calling at me. I finish all the food. Typically, if I have no other orders, I tend to deliver food to the counter to help out the waitress, but obviously, I don’t do that for these two. I walk up to the guy.

Me: “Look. I might be a b**** but I ain’t a dog, and the next time you disrespect me like that, I will refuse you service.”

Of course, he tries to cut in and say he wasn’t being disrespectful. I simply talk louder, say my speech, and walk away fuming mad. Later, the waitress calls me over, points at the guy, and says:

Waitress: “He has something to say to you.”

The guy hands me a ten.

Customer: *Meekly* “Here. I’m sorry for how I acted.”

There’s a snobby regular who comes through drive-thru who has a typical “the customer is always right” attitude. I know what’s the best and cheapest way for a customer to get their specific orders. I have tried to help this guy out many times so I know his order.

One time, he decides to come into the restaurant with a friend. He orders his usual tenders with one side and a drink, but two of each. I ring it up but my coworkers in the back realize that there is a cheaper option to do it. I had forgotten about this option so my coworkers on the back line point it out. I realize my mistake and my coworkers and I laugh it off.

The customer decides to start an argument with my coworker.

Customer: “You were bullying her! You should just mind your own business. She’s perfectly capable of working the cash register!”

He just kept yelling at her. The managers got involved and tried to calm them down. At this point, all the diners were watching what was happening. The guy got his food and headed out, leaving his two large drinks which cost him about $10.

I work as a waitress at a small restaurant. We do not have a dedicated hostess; this is done by whichever waitress is available.

A father and his six-year-old son, both regulars, always sit in a specific waitress’s section. I greet them.

Me: “Would you like a table or a booth?”

Little Boy: “We’d like a booth in [Specific Waitress]’s section.”

Me: “[Specific Waitress] is not working today.”

Without missing a beat, the little boy says:

Little Boy: “Oh, can we have your second-best waitress, then?”

It was said so innocently, I couldn’t help but laugh along with the father.