Tip Of The Hat Towards Karma

, , , , | Working | August 20, 2017

(I work at a restaurant doing carryout. It’s our down time, so all employees are supposed to help out wherever they’re needed. The girl who’s on checker does not get up to help at all. Mind you, I’m on carryout by myself and five different customers come up all at once. I grab a different coworker to come help me. While this coworker is taking an order, the phone rings and she puts it on hold.)

Coworker: “[My Name], there’s an order on the phone.”

Me: “Okay, I’ll get it in a minute.”

Lazy Coworker: “Who’d you say it was on the phone?”

Coworker: “[Regular Customer].”

(Mind you, Regular Customer always tips.)

Lazy Coworker: “I’ll get it!”

(When Regular Customer came to pick up his food, he did not tip! She only helped out to try and get that tip and he didn’t even tip this time! Karma.)

Going On Break With No Paper Trail

, , , , | Working | August 20, 2017

(Once in a while, and only on Saturdays, they have four to eight people working on papers at a table in the back. It’s literally the easiest thing you can do there since all you have to do is put a paper in a bigger pile of papers, carry it over to a machine, and push it through. That’s it. One night, a new girl comes in.)

Me: “Hello.”

New Girl: “Hey…”

(Shortly after that we get the papers. We start and then about an hour later this gem happens:)

New Girl: *sigh* “I’m going on break.”

Me: “Uh, you can’t just go on break. Wait until they send you.”

New Girl: “Well, when are they going to do that?”

Me: “It’s gonna be a short night so, honestly, I don’t think we’ll get one, but maybe we’ll get a ten minute break later.”

New Girl: “No break…? Isn’t that, like, illegal?”

Me: “Well, no. New Jersey law says that you only get a half hour break after six hours. Since this only takes about four hours, we won’t get a break. I’ve done this a few times, though, so I know that eventually we’ll run out of paper and we’ll get a short break. It might be even longer if the machine breaks down instead.”

New Girl: “So you’re telling me that after touching this dirty paper for about an hour, I’m not even going to get a break.”

Me: “Yes… but there’s a good chance we wi—”

New Girl: *scoffs* “I’m going on break.”

(She grabbed her phone and left. I and other people working at the time were flabbergasted. We did eventually get our break, but she wouldn’t know since she was gone for about an hour or two. She eventually came back and continued to work for the remaining hour and then left. I’m glad she didn’t look at me during that hour, since I’m positive I glared at her every time I looked her way. Luckily, that was the only time that happened since I haven’t seen her there since.)

Tanking Your Credibility

, , , | Working | August 19, 2017

(It’s been a very cold winter so far. My manager has told me not to sell any propane tanks on our shift, as we work thirds. I’m at the front end and it’s about 11:30 at night and I’m preparing for the registers to reset.)

Elderly Customer: “Hi, I was just wondering if I could get a propane tank.”

Me: *wincing* “I’m sorry, but we don’t sell propane tanks at this time at night.”

Elderly Customer: “Oh, I’ve already been to two places and they didn’t have the type of tank I need.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but my manager really doesn’t like us to do it, since it’s so cold and dark out.”

Elderly Customer: “I wouldn’t even mind doing it myself.”

Me: “I’m really sorry, but the cage is locked up.”

Elderly Customer: “Oh, right. I really do need to get one though…”

Me: “I’m sorry. Even if I attempt to ask my manager he screams to me over the radio, ‘NO!'” *nervous laughter, as I feel really bad about turning her away*

(During this I’m changing over a register and thinking to myself that maybe I should send her to my manager to see if she can talk him into it. When I turn around though, she’s gone. I continue with my duties for another 10 or 15 minutes.)

Manager: *on radio* “[My Name], you’re in trouble!”

Me: “Why, what’d I do?”

Manager: *slightly more mocking* “You know what you did!”

(I guess the customer HAD gone to him and asked him about getting propane. Both he and the supporting manager thought I had sent her to them. They complained for the next couple of hours about going out in the cold, all the while with me attempting to convince them I didn’t send her to them. I’m not sure if they ever eventually believed me.)

How Much Lung Cancer Do You Need Before You’re Allowed A Break?

, , , | Working | August 19, 2017

(I work overnights at a gas station. Due to a loophole in the laws of my state, the company I work for is able to shirk giving us 30-minute breaks by instead paying a yearly fine. After months of not being guaranteed a break, I decided to buy a pack of cigarettes to go on fake smoke breaks. I tucked them in my bag for later.)

Coworker #1: *barges into the kitchen* “Since when do you smoke?”

Me: “What?”

Coworker #2: *turning to me* “You smoke?!”

Coworker #1: “I saw cigarettes in her bag.”

Me: “You were SNOOPING in my bag?”

Coworker #1: “Your bag was open and I happened to glance inside. But seriously, when did you start smoking?”

Coworker #2: “Oh, my god, you better not have started smoking!”

Me: “Woah, woah. You two are hypocrites!”

(Both of them actually smoke cigarettes, one since the eighth grade.)

Coworker #2: “Just because we smoke doesn’t mean we want you to!”

Coworker #1: “Yeah, we make bad choices!”

Me: *starting to laugh* “Oh, my god. Guys, I bought them for the breaks.”

Coworker #1: “What?”

Me: “I bought them so I could go on smoke breaks. Not to actually smoke them.”

Coworker #2: “Oh, my god.”

Coworker #1: “You genius. I hate you.”

(I haven’t let them live it down, but every now and then they both ask to see the pack of cigarettes to make sure I haven’t started smoking!)

Sometimes Those Do Require Some Management

, , , , , | Working | August 18, 2017

I’m working one day when a high school-age girl walks in and hands me a filled-out job application. Despite the fact that we don’t require a resume to apply here, she’s gone ahead and stapled one to the application. I thank her and duck into the back to put the resume on the manager’s desk.

Despite myself, I risk a peek at the girl’s resume. She has a previous job at a different fast food restaurant listed under “job experience,” and it looks as if one of her prior duties was “managing afternoon shifts.”

Unfortunately, she left the “f” out of the word “shifts.”

She didn’t get the job, but we all had a good laugh over the typo.

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