Some Staff Are Very Low-Rent

, , , | Working | April 19, 2018

(The apartment complex I live in requires us to have renter’s insurance, and to provide a copy of our insurance documents for the main office to keep on file. I get home from work one day, and there’s a message on my answering machine from the office, saying they need a copy of my renter’s insurance policy. My policy runs from December to December, so I’m thinking they must have lost it, since I took it to them the previous December. I make a copy and take it to the office the next morning.)

Me: “Hi, I’m [My Name], and I got a call you needed this.”

(I hand the employee the copy of my policy.)

Employee: *looks at it* “No, we need next year’s.”

Me: “I’m sorry, what?”

Employee: “This one is expired.”

Me: “No, it’s not. See?” *points to dates at the top* “It expires in December. We’re in September. It’s still valid for three more months.”

Employee: “Well, we need next year’s.”

Me: “I don’t have next year’s, yet. It’s only September. I won’t renew it until December. I’ll bring it to you then.”

Employee: “Other residents have brought us next year’s.”

Me: “Well, sure. If their policies are a year like mine and they renewed in, say, July, then yes, it would cover until July of next year. But mine is good through December. I don’t know what else to tell you.”

Employee: “You need to contact your insurance agent and get next year’s. We need it.”

Me: “My insurance agent will send me the renewal in November, like he has every year for the last eight years, and I will bring you the copy in December once I’ve paid it, like I have for the last eight years. I don’t know what else to tell you. You’ll get it in December. I can’t bring you something I don’t have.”

Employee: “I’ll have to contact the corporate office. You’re in violation of your lease agreement.”

Me: *as I turn to leave* “Oh, trust me; I’m not.”

(Never did hear anything from the corporate office. In December, when I renewed my policy I took a copy to the office, like I always do, every year. I did not see that employee.)

Wi-Fi Is Not In The Cards

, , , , | Working | April 19, 2018

(I’m Canadian and living in Sweden. My bank introduced the tap feature on debit and credit card a few years before it came to Sweden. I’m in a store buying some school supplies, and I hand the cashier my card. The tap symbol on cards looks very similar to the Wi-Fi symbol. He takes my card and pauses to look at it.)

Me: *thinking he was trying to figure out where it’s from* “Oh, I’m from Canada and still use a Canadian bank.”

Cashier: “Oh, no, I… Um… ” *pauses and turns a bit red* “Do Canadian bank cards have Wi-Fi?”

Me: *gives the cashier a confused look* “Do our bank cards have… Wi-Fi?”

Cashier: *blushes* “Yeah, I mean, you have this here.” *points to the tap symbol on my card*

Me: *suddenly realizing that the tap symbol and Wi-Fi symbol look alike* “Oh, that! It’s a tap symbol. In Canada, I can just tap my card instead of using the chip reader.”

(I take my card and demonstrate.)

Cashier: “Ah, okay. Well, that’s not nearly as exciting.”

(We both had a good laugh. Now every time I see the tap symbol, I always think of that cashier.)

Not A Very Powerful Scam

, , | Working | April 19, 2018

(I’m working the front desk at a tire and repair shop when I get a call from an anonymous phone number. This happens fairly frequently, so I think nothing of it and answer.)

Caller: *in a thick accent* “Hello, I am calling to verify that you are aware that [Power Company #1] will be turning off your power in 45 minutes.”

Me: *uncertainly* “Uh-huh.”

Caller: “Please call this 800-number and enter this verification code to reach the customer service hotline.”

(I Google the number, and the first result is the 800-number followed by a string of Chinese characters. I promptly hang up. Later:)

Me: “Hey, [Boss], who do we get power from?”

Boss: “I’m pretty sure it’s from [Power Company #2].”

Me: “So, I guess the call I just got from [Power Company #1] saying they were going to shut off our power was a scam?”

(We had a laugh over that one.)

This Is The New Way To Act Presidential

, , , , | Working | April 19, 2018

(I am meeting with the leader of a volunteer organization for my son’s school to interview for the treasurer position. As we are talking, conversation gets around to where I work, and I mention I work for [Fast Food Restaurant]. When I say this, the club president gets an annoyed look on his face.)

Club President: “You don’t work for [Fast Food Restaurant] in [Town #1], do you?”

Me: “No, I work for the one in [Town #2].”

(He looks relieved and goes on to tell me about his last visit to [Fast Food Restaurant] in [Town #1].)

Club President: “Oh, good. Those people who work there are useless. They are so stupid. I went there a few weeks ago at like two in the morning and they had their drive-thru all blocked off.”

(I used to work for this store, which is a 24-hour restaurant; however, they do have to close for about four hours every three months to have their exhaust hoods serviced. Since the hood cleaners need to have their truck close to the store and the roof access, the drive-thru is blocked off with large caution cones, and a brave employee will generally park their car at the entrance of the drive-thru to prevent someone running over the cones and entering the drive-thru, anyway. Signs are posted on the doors, the drive-thru window, and the drive-thru speaker, letting guests know about this. I am about to explain this when he continues.)

Club President: “Yeah, they had cones and a car right there so no one could get in, so I had to drive my truck over the curb.”

(I am pretty surprised at this. While he has a large truck that could easily do this, in all my years at that store I had never heard of someone seeing the cones AND a vehicle blocking the drive-thru and deciding to jump the curb, instead of trying to come inside to see what is wrong.)

Club President: “I get to the speaker and no one answers. I’m sitting there for ten minutes and no one is answering. I can’t leave because there is this truck just parked in the drive-thru, not moving, and there were a bunch of cars behind me that went over the curb when I did, so I can’t get out. I finally manage to get out, and I go to the door, and it’s locked. There is this little midget inside, and she won’t open the door for me.”

(I know the employee he’s talking about, and while dwarfism does run on one side of her family, it is considered very insulting to call a little person a midget. The club president is a VERY large man, and I could totally see a small young woman not wanting to open the door for a very angry man who is at least six times her size.)

Club President: “So I walk around to the drive-thru window, and finally the midget opens it for me, I ask her why the hell the drive-thru is blocked, and why the doors are locked. She gives me this annoyed look like I’m stupid and says, ‘Umm, because we are closed.’ I ask her if I could order now, since I am there, and she won’t even take my order! How useless is she? I’m glad you don’t work for those losers. I won’t go there ever again, if they don’t even know how to run a business!”

(He changed the subject after that, and I didn’t try to correct him. I didn’t want to cause a personality conflict when I was just trying to help my son’s school. He turned out not to be bad to work with, aside from trying to make me change my voicemail message on my personal cell phone, because it was inappropriate — it was an iconic character from a fast food chain saying I was his wing-man. The club president and his wife did a lot of wonderful things for my son’s school.)

Credited With The Sound Of Silence

, , , , | Working | April 19, 2018

(I’m getting ready to move two hours away and need to set up electricity for the new apartment I’m moving to. The power company at my new apartment is different than the one at my current apartment, so I call the new company to get an account set up.)

Representative: “You need power turned on at [date] for [address]; is this correct?”

Me: “Yep, you got it.”

Representative: “Okay, since you have never had an account with us, there will be a deposit.”

(Several seconds of silence follow as I’m hoping there will be a followup to his last sentence.)

Me: “Is that just because I’ve never had power with you before, or can you do like a credit check?”

Representative: “If you had let me FINISH, I would have said that you would have to pay a deposit assuming you fail a credit check.”

(Yes, he yelled the word “finish” and I’m pretty angry at how much of a jerk this guy is being.)

Me: “Then run my d*** credit. Are you running it yet? Are you finished talking? Is it credit check time? I’m assuming that you not talking means you are finished with your sentence. Of course, I thought that before, when you were quiet for five full seconds, but maybe I’m wrong. Go ahead… Run my credit.”

Representative: *a little bit nicer* “Um… Okay. I will go ahead and run your credit, now.”

(A few more seconds pass.)

Representative: “Okay. You do not have to pay a deposit. Your credit score is really good.”

Me: “Didn’t think I would need to pay one.”

Representative: “Your account is set up. I’m going to send you over to a survey to rate our conversation. Remember to rate me fairly based on the service I have provided today.”

(I rated him VERY fairly based on the service he provided.)

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