Take It To Your Grave

, , , , , , , | Legal | June 18, 2021

I had a client come into my office to deal with her brother’s estate. Her brother, unmarried and childless, had known he was terminal for almost a year before he died. He chose to spend that year applying for as many credit cards as he could and maxing them all out. Amazingly, he got credit cards for four major banks and managed to rack up more than $50,000.00 in debt before he died. He had maybe $10,000.00 in savings that he had kept as a cushion to make sure the debt collectors didn’t come after him until it was too late.

The first thing I did was assure the sister that no one was responsible for her brother’s debts except his estate. After that, I gave her the options.

Option A was the technically correct way to handle the estate: contact all the banks, get them to agree to take a ratable percentage of the remaining assets, and pay them out. This could take months and would cost a lot of money.

Option B was not technically the correct way to handle it but it was easier: contact the banks, tell them that the sister had resigned as estate trustee and no one was replacing her, and ask them not to contact her.

She obviously went with Option B. With no one in charge of the estate, the banks couldn’t even attempt to collect on the debt, and there was no way to go through legal channels to collect the money that would not cost ten times the money owed.

Do I have sympathy for the banks? Nope.

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The Couponator 27: Red Friday

, , , , , | Working | CREDIT: Raptor-2020 | June 18, 2021

My workplace has big Black Friday sales. For working Black Friday, we basically get a one-time-use coupon for a very heavy discount on anything that we can add to our normal employee discount. It only lasts a few weeks before expiring, so we have to use it quickly.

I only work there for one holiday season, so I only go through Black Friday once, but it is a nightmare. I definitely earn that coupon.

A few weeks after Black Friday, and about a week after the coupons expire, I come into work for my shift. During our lunch break, I hear some of my coworkers talking about somebody being crazy. I ask them what they’re talking about.

One of the employees that worked on Black Friday had apparently forgotten that the Black Friday working coupons had an expiration date. Apparently, the day before, she had decided to try and make a really big purchase using the coupon, and the cashier said it had expired. She lost her mind, screaming at the cashier and demanding they take it. She said that since she had worked for it and it was their duty to take it no matter what, and she wouldn’t accept having worked Black Friday and not getting that discount. Several managers, including the store manager, had to come deal with her, and eventually she was escorted off the property. She wasn’t fired for her outburst but received some disciplinary action.

The employee apparently snapped over the managers daring to refuse her. The next day, maybe twelve hours after she tried to use her coupon she returned to the store with a knife, a shotgun, and a blowtorch, intent on killing her manager and her coworkers and setting the building on fire. She somehow dropped her knife on the way in, and when she got into the store, her gun jammed. Left with just the blowtorch, she started to try and set the mat in the entrance on fire.

She was quickly tackled by security and restrained until police arrived and she was arrested. She was, of course, fired, and faced some pretty heavy charges. I don’t remember the charges; all I remember is seeing her mugshot online with her in a straitjacket.

Thankfully, nobody was harmed, and no damage was done to the store.

The Couponator 26: Father’s Day

The Couponator 25: The Cheese Explosion
The Couponator 24: My Funds, My Rules
The Couponator 23: The Time Destroyer
The Couponator 22: Coupons Of Mass Consumption

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Cake Of Bridezilla

, , , , , | Right | June 17, 2021

A mother and her bride-to-be daughter were in to look at the wedding cake they’d ordered for the wedding that was scheduled in two days. Seeing a cake on the counter, the bride started ranting and raving about how this cake was wrong and it wasn’t at all what she ordered. She then proceeded to smash the cake with her fists.

Well, she was right. It was nothing like she ordered. It was what another couple had ordered for their wedding.

The police let her clean her hands before they put on the handcuffs.

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The First Tip Is Just The Tip

, , , , , , | Right | June 16, 2021

We were about halfway through our self-catering holiday and we found a fantastic café; the food was good, the prices were very cheap, and the staff was lovely!

Tipping isn’t customary in the UK, and not knowing what the locals do, I tipped around 15-20% on our meal.

We ended up coming back several times, and we tipped every time, as the service was faultless. We reckon we saved as much as we were tipping going to the bigger restaurant, so everyone was happy.

On our last day, we couldn’t think of anywhere we would rather eat but our favourite little cafe. The bill came and the waitress told us, in broken English, that our bill had been discounted by the manager.

It was a generous discount. Unfortunately, as we had quite a lot of small euro bills to use up, I ended up emptying what I had left; it paid for the bill in full and another tip.

The waitress seemed very confused, probably about the strange English family who didn’t understand a discount.

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Loyalty, Thy Name Is Dog

, , , , , , , | Legal | June 16, 2021

Police came and pulled a student out of my class, much to the interest of his classmates. He was informed that he was needed at his home immediately but was given no other information. The cops loaded the boy into the back of the cruiser, while his classmates looked on, and they went to the boy’s house.

When they arrived, this was the scene that greeted him. A group of cops was standing at the gate to the backyard, one with his sidearm drawn and pointing into the backyard. The boy was brought forward and he saw two men sitting in the tree in the backyard with his dog at the base watching them and growing softly.

Apparently, one of the men, actually a teenager, had hopped the fence and broken into the house and then proceeded to help himself to whatever took his fancy. As the burglar started to exit the house, a big white dog came charging out, barking at full volume, charging the teen into the backyard and up the tree. The dog had managed to close his jaws on the rear pocket of the teen’s jeans and turn out the entire panel; his wallet was located in this panel.

The dog heard the cops approaching as they responded to a neighbor reporting the break-in and had slunk back into his ambush spot. The cops saw the teen in the tree and one jumped the fence to arrest him. Out came the dog again, barking at full volume. The officer ended up in the same tree as the teen.

The other officers were trying to decide what to do when, as it’s a small town, one was sent to collect the boy from school. The officer with the drawn sidearm was getting set to “end the situation” when the boy appeared. The boy was asked to control the situation, which he did. He walked into the backyard and called the dog to his side. The dog looked over his shoulder, wagged his tail at seeing his owner, and turned back to continue growling at the men in the tree, all the while scooting backward toward the boy.

When the dog reached the boy, he was sent into the garage where the boy closed the door behind him. He turned to the cops and asked, “What’s the problem?”

The teen was arrested and hauled off and the cops, impressed with the display, actually offered to buy the dog. It seems the dog would let you enter but wouldn’t let you leave.

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