Game, Set, And Price Match!

, , , , , | Working | March 25, 2019

(Where I work, employees get a 15% discount when we enter our employee IDs. We also just started price matching local competitors’ ads and certain online retailers. We cannot, however, price match and use our discount in the same transaction. I am in the store on my day off when I see a product on our shelf for $20. I look it up online and see that one of the retailers we match with is having a sale where the same item is only $7. I pick up two of these items and go to the register.)

Cashier: “[My Name], are you working today?”

Me: “No, it’s my day off. I’m just getting these two things, but I’m price matching them.”

Cashier: “You can’t do that.”

Me: “Oh, no, it’s okay. I just can’t use my discount, which is fine because I’m saving way more this way.”

Cashier: “No. You can’t.”

Me: “Yes. I can.”

Cashier: “Look. I’m not going to argue with you about this. You can’t price match. The end.”

Me: “Get [Manager].”

Cashier: “No. Just because customers complain and get what they want doesn’t mean you can.”

Me: “Get [Manager] now or I’ll find her myself.”

Cashier: “Fine.” *voids transaction* “Bye.”

(I walk off, fuming, and find the manager. I explain what happened and she follows me back to the register. When the cashier sees us approaching, she rolls her eyes.)

Cashier: “[My Name] is trying to double dip!”

Manager: “She’s not trying to double dip. She’s price matching without her discount.”

Cashier: “But that’s not allowed!”

Manager: “Yes, it is. How… You know what? I’ll do it myself.”

Cashier: “You can’t price match for associates!”

Me: “You can’t price match and use your associate discount. One or the other is fine.”

Cashier: “No!”

Manager: “[Cashier], go to the office.”

Cashier: “THIS IS BULLS***!” *storms off*

Manager: *calls for another cashier over the radio* “I’m sorry, [My Name]. I don’t know how many times we’ve told her it’s fine.”

Me: “It’s not your fault. I’ve told her several times myself.”

Manager: “I’d like to say she’s trying to save the store from losing too much money, but I think she’s just…” *shrugs*

Me: *to myself* “Stupid.”

Manager: *laughs* “Your words, not mine. And don’t say that on the clock.”

(I did get to price match my purchase and the manager talked to the cashier. I don’t know if she actually understood or not but after all that, the price matching policy was printed and posted at every register.)

I’d Like To Order Some Camel Back, And Some Straw To Break It

, , , , , | Working | March 25, 2019

(My family loves the food from a local Chinese place that delivers, although their customer service leaves something to be desired. Once they accidentally double-charged my credit card and refused a refund, only offering a credit to our account. That left a sour taste in my mouth, but since I have the credit, I decide to order again.)

Operator: “Okay, and your card number for the purchase?”

Me: “I should have a credit on my account from last time. Can you look?”

(After about a five-minute wait, they get back on the line.)

Operator: “Okay, it will be there in forty-five minutes.” *hangs up*

(An hour passes so I call to check on the order.)

Me: “Yes, I am just checking on the status of a delivery? It’s been about an hour since I called in.”

Operator: “Hold, please.”

(Another five minutes pass.)

Operator: “Yeah, it’s on its way.”

Me: “But I didn’t tell you my na—“ *clicks*

(Another thirty minutes passes, so I call to tell them never mind.)

Me: “Yes, it’s been an hour and a half, so I’d like to cancel my delivery.”

Operator: “Okay, what’s your name?”

(I tell them.)

Operator: “Hmm, I don’t see any orders placed under your name tonight.”

Me: *laughs incredulously* “Okay, why am I not surprised.”

Operator: “Do you want to place an order?”

Me: “No. No, I don’t. Goodbye.”

(It’s been a few months, and I think this was the straw that broke the camel’s back.)

Someone Had Their Cheer-ios This Morning

, , , , , | Working | March 24, 2019

One day at work in our small office, the intercom beeped, as it usually does before our receptionist announces who a call is for and what line. However, this time, I didn’t hear our receptionist. Instead, my phone started squealing and beeping!

I started to giggle at the technological difficulties, and then one of my coworkers said something funny from his office, and I burst out laughing. All of a sudden, my boss appeared in my office, and simply pointed at my phone. Somehow, I had accidentally bumped a button and paged the entire office, so everyone heard me giggling and laughing over the intercom!

Not Using All Their Brain Meats

, , , , , , | Working | March 23, 2019

(There is a grocery store in town that does not allow customers to use their own bags. They also bag badly. I’ve come out of there with 12 items in 16 bags in the past. Today I bought about half a basket of stuff and sighed as the cashier bagged so many things one to a bag despite my protests.)

Me: “Wait. Please put both packages of meat in the same bag. This is getting ridiculous.”

Cashier: “We don’t bag two kinds of meat together. Cross contamination.”

Me: “They aren’t two kinds of meat. They are both beef.”

Cashier: “One is hamburger. One is roast.”

Me: “Yes. One is ground beef and the other is a chunk of beef.”

Cashier: “We don’t bag two kinds of meat together. Cross contamination.”

Me: “They are not two different kinds of meat. One is labeled ground chuck and the other is labeled chuck roast. They are both beef. They both come from cows.”

Cashier: “No, they don’t.”

Me: *totally surprised* “What? Of course they do. They are two cuts of beef, and beef is cow meat.”

Cashier: “Cows are for dairy.”

Me: “Cattle. Cows. Steers. Beef. Please just bag the meat together.”

Cashier: “We don’t bag two kinds of meat together. Cross contamination.”

Me: “Both kinds of meat came off the same animal.”

Cashier: “No, they don’t. We don’t bag two kinds of meat together. Cross contamination.”

(I just stared at her in amazement. I’m not from here. My accent makes that clear. But she spoke with a very local accent. I live two miles out of town and five miles from this store. I had to pass three huge herds of cattle to get there. How could anyone from this area not know where beef/chuck/hamburger/roast comes from?)

So Incompetent You Could Just Die!

, , , , | Working | March 22, 2019

(I live with my grandmother as she has problems moving around. Since I moved in with her, I have added Internet access on top of her normal cable box. However, I have noticed that the Internet randomly drops connection and stays disconnected for a few minutes. I call up the Internet company and notice that it is under my grandfather’s name first. He passed away ten years ago.)

Internet Rep: “Am I speaking to [Grandfather]?”

Me: “No, I’m his grandson. He passed away ten years ago. I can put my grandmother on the line as she is also on the account.”

Internet Rep: “I’m sorry, but unless he talks to me I can’t continue this conversation. He is the name on the account.”

Me: “I don’t understand; she is also on the account, so she can help out.”

Internet Rep: “He is on the account. I can’t continue unless he talks with me.”

(I decide to try something stupid and tell him to hold on.)

Me: *with the same voice* “Hello, this is [Grandfather].”

Internet Rep: “Ah, thank you. Now we can begin your fix. What is the problem?”

(I couldn’t believe that worked. In fact, I just found it easier to say I’m my grandfather when talking with the companies. I asked how to remove his name from the account during another conversation, but I needed a four certified copies of his death certificate!)

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