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You Catch More Flights With Honey Than Vinegar

, , , , | Right | October 21, 2021

I’m in my final year of university. My boyfriend and I are in a long-distance relationship; he lives on the British Columbia coast while I am in southern Alberta.

During spring break, I decide to book a plane trip out to spend the week with him. As it is a short trip, I want to have as much time with him as possible; therefore, I am looking for an early flight. Due to previous problems with other airlines, I don’t like to book with anyone except a specific airline.

I notice that their 10:00 am flight is quite expensive, around $200 one way. Not happy with that, I keep looking and am quite pleased to find a much cheaper flight, about $100 one way, for a 9:00 am flight! Wanting to scoop that deal up before the prices change, I book my flight with a one-way ticket, thinking I might be able to get a better deal booking my tickets separately rather than together.

A small part of my gut is telling me there is something fishy about that 9:00 am flight I found that is cheaper than the 10:00 am. Stupidly, I push that down and instead just look forward to my trip.

The night before my flight, I find I’m not able to check in. I find this strange, but again, I push it aside and strive to just check in with an agent instead at the airport. The next morning:

Me: “Hi, I’m having trouble checking in for my flight. Would you be able to help me? I’m not sure what’s wrong. I’m due to fly out in about an hour.”

Agent: “Sure, no problem. What’s your name?”

I tell the agent, and the agent types it into her computer and frowns at her screen.

Agent: “Hmm, that seems to be a bit strange. I’m not sure why you’re having trouble checking in. Let me look a bit further.”

I’m slightly worried. I booked through a third-party website to try and find the best deals on flights, and now I’m concerned that I was not properly registered for this flight. After a couple minutes, I see the agent’s eyes widen in realization and fear. As she turns to me, I can practically see her trying to curl in on herself.

Agent: “I found the problem. You’re not scheduled for a 9:00 am flight this morning; you’re scheduled for a 9:00 pm flight tonight.”

Suddenly, the cheaper flight makes sense and my heart drops into my stomach. The agent is leaning as far away from me as she can get, clearly prepared for the explosion of rage she thinks is coming her way.

I let out a string of expletives under my breath as I look away from her so she doesn’t think I am directing them at her. It isn’t HER fault after all but mine for not reading the times properly. Once I compose myself, I turn back to her.

Me: “Okay, well, I don’t really want to wait until 9:00 pm tonight and lose a whole day with my boyfriend. Is there anything I can do to fix this?”

The agent looks a little relieved but still apprehensive.

Agent: “Well, I can bump you to the 10:00 am flight, but there will be a fee of $150 to do that.”

I whisper more expletives to myself. As a student, money is tight, and this trip is already pushing it for me.

Agent: “Or you could call [Third-Party Website] to see if you would be able to change your flight through them?”

I realize I will have to bite the bullet for this and hope they will be able to accept a different credit card from the one on file.

Me: “No, I don’t know how long that would take, and I don’t want to miss the 10:00 am flight. I’ll just pay the fee and move to that one, please.”

The agent nods and glances back to her computer, typing information and making the changes I’ve requested. In the meantime, I’m digging in my purse to pull out my wallet and the card I want to use. As I glance up, my card in hand, the agent is holding my boarding pass out to me.

Me: “Wait, what about the fee?”

Agent: “I waived it this time, but please be sure to be more careful in the future.”

Me: *Nearly in tears* “Thank you! Thank you so much! I promise I will!”

I accepted the boarding pass and scurried off to security. As I promised that agent, I’ve never made that mistake again and my boyfriend and I are now happily living together.

The Passenger Has Totally Checked Out

, , , , , | Right | October 20, 2021

I am waiting to board a flight when we receive word that it has been cancelled due to fog in the other city — not an uncommon thing to happen. Everyone lines up at the desk to get rebooked onto different flights. I’m waiting my turn when I see this gem of an interaction.

Flight Attendant: “All right, you have now been rebooked on [new flight number]. Do you have checked luggage?”

Passenger: “Yes.”

Flight Attendant: “Great. You will need to collect it from Carousel 2 and take it back to the desks to be checked in for your new flight.”

Passenger: “But it’s already been checked in.”

Flight Attendant: “Pardon?”

Passenger: “It’s been checked in. I did that about an hour ago.”

Flight Attendant: “Yes, for your cancelled flight. But you need to check it in for your new flight.”

Passenger: “You don’t understand. The luggage has been checked in already. That’s done.”

Flight Attendant: “For which flight?”

Passenger: “[Old flight number], duh.”

Flight Attendant: “The flight that got cancelled.”

Passenger: “Yeah.”

Flight Attendant: “But you’re now on a new flight.”

Passenger: “Yeah.”

Flight Attendant: “Which means you need to check your luggage on your new flight.”

Passenger: *Pauses* “I don’t get it.”

The poor flight attendant must have gone through the whole conversation four times, doing everything except pulling out finger puppets to convince the traveller to check his luggage. He finally left, still looking confused, and I was able to rebook my own flight. The flight attendant looked very relieved when I assured her that I only had a carry-on.

Humility Will Take You To New Heights

, , , , | Right | CREDIT: Mike_OxonFaier | September 8, 2021

My friend’s mum is a customs officer in a large British international airport. Customs officers are the ones who check your bags for prohibited items and things you need to pay import tax on.

A few years ago, she was on duty when a famous singer came through customs. She stopped him. No special allowance is given to famous people, and some of them get caught with drugs.

Singer: “Do you know who I am?”

My friend’s mum actually did know.

Mum: “No. I don’t. Do you know who I am?”

The singer was stumped by this question, and his confusion showed on his face.

Mum: “I am the officer who will arrest you if you don’t cooperate.”

The singer wisely chose to cooperate.

When Security At The Airport Is More Of A Suggestion

, , | Right | September 5, 2021

I work security at an airport.

Customer: “I need you to look after my bags for me while I shop.”

Me: “I can’t do that, ma’am. For security reasons you must keep all your bags with you at all times.”

Customer: *Going off on me.* “Ugh! I can’t believe you won’t do this for me!”

My coworker then explains the exact same thing to her.

Customer: “I believe your coworker because he has a nice smile, but you not so much.” *Storms off.*

We had a good laugh about that one.

You Were Warned

, , , , , , , | Working | September 2, 2021

I am sitting at a gate in an airport waiting for my flight to start boarding. A frantic woman runs up to the desk agent near the gate. The woman has a leashed dog with her.

Woman: “Where is the pet relief area?!”

Desk Agent: *Turns to look at the dog* “Hi, puppy!”

Woman: “Excuse me, ma’am! Where is the pet relief area?!”

Desk Agent: *Sarcastically* “Well, excuse me for talking to your dog!”

Woman: “I don’t care if you sing opera to my dog. If you don’t tell me where the pet relief area is, she’s going to take a s*** right here!”

Desk Agent: “That’s okay if she does; it’s fine.”

Woman: *Turns to the dog* “Madeline, finish your business now.”

The dog promptly went number two. I felt my mouth hanging wide open in disbelief, and the gate agent’s face looked similar. To her credit, the woman fully cleaned up the mess with bags, spray, and napkins she kept in her purse.