Unfiltered Story #167609

, , | Unfiltered | September 21, 2019

Conversations in retail.

Customer: Can you tell me the price of this stuffed penguin?
Me: Oh, the price sticker is just on the tag on the side of him there.
Customer: *stares blankly, remains motionless*
Me: *walk around, look where I told her to look* Thirty dollars.
Customer: Do you have a card for him?
Me: A what?
Customer: A card?
Me: A… what?
Customer: A business card for him?
Me: A business card for the penguin?
Customer: Yes.
Me: … A… a business card. For the penguin. … Like… does the penguin… have a business card?
Customer: …Yes
Me: …
Customer: So I can order him later if I want him?

She’s In For A Shock If She Ever Goes To Indonesia  

, , , , | Right | September 6, 2019

(My wife and I have been married twenty years and never taken a vacation for just us. We both have just recently “graduated” after going back to school to further our education for our careers. Our kids are older, allowing my father-in-law to watch them, just making sure they get hot food, and get to school and sports. Some good friends of ours get a great package deal for an all-inclusive resort in Mexico that they have been to before and want to know if we want in on the special rates. So, off we go on a seven-day trip to Mexico with some good friends. About the third day in Mexico, I am at the resort shop buying some odds and ends and have already noticed the sign that shows the exchange rates between pesos and other forms of currency they accept. I see the price tag and then do the math using the posted exchange rate. As I am paying the very polite cashier, I hear a rude woman just lose it on one of the employees.)


Employee: “No, that is—”


Employee: “Yes, English, price is…”

Rude Customer: “SPEAK ENGLISH!”

(I have had enough.)

Me: “Ma’am, as the employee started to tell you twice in English, the sticker is the amount in pesos. The exchange rate is posted right here.” *pointing to sign next to register*

Rude Customer: “WHY WOULD IT BE IN PESOS?”

Me: *laughing* “We are in Mexico… and pesos are the currency in this country. No wonder Americans get a bad reputation for being rude.”

Rude Customer: *glaring at me and muttering* “What do you Canadians know, anyway?”

Me: “Lady, who said I am Canadian? I am from the Midwest, the heartland of the USA, and you are just being rude.”

(With that, I went and enjoyed my vacation, just wondering how someone could be so entitled and rude.)

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Can We Just Look Around And Ruin Your Evening?

, , , | Right | August 22, 2019

(I’m the last one to leave after closing. As I’m locking the front door behind me on my way out, a middle-aged couple approaches. The store is completely dark, the “closed” sign is up on the door, and there is no one left inside.)

Customer: “Oh, are you closed?”

Me: “Yes, we closed about twenty minutes ago.”

Customer: “Can we just come in and look around for a few minutes?” 

Me: “Unfortunately, that’s not possible; we’ve already shut down the registers.”

Customer: “We aren’t looking to buy anything! We just want to look around!”

Me: “We’re closed. I can’t let you in. I need to leave now. I have somewhere to be.”

(They continued to stand there, staring at the door, as I walked away. I kept an eye on them as I got into my car, and saw them try the door once or twice, then look at the hours sign next to the door, and then look at their phones before finally walking away. I made sure that they were long gone before I drove away.)

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Unfiltered Story #160058

, , | Unfiltered | August 8, 2019

We sell Black Forest Cuckoo Clocks in our store. One day a tourist with his 5-year-old son comes in and they watch one of the clocks where the bird comes out, making “cuckoo, cuckoo”.
Father to the son: “Do you know what bird that is?”
Son, sounding uncertain: “A rooster?”
Father: “No, an owl!”

(Even worse: they came from Germany and really should know better!)

If Only She Could Ear Herself

, , , , , | Right | July 31, 2019

(A woman comes into our small gift store on a particularly quiet day and begins looking around. She is the only customer in the store and my boss is in back.)

Me: “Hello, can I help you find anything?”

Customer: “I just love this store; you always have such nice things here.”

Me: “Thank you. Please let me know if you need anything.”

(The woman stares at one of our displays for a few minutes and then approaches the counter where I am putting together gift baskets.)

Customer: *suddenly in an impatient voice* “I would like to make a return.”

Me: “Sure, what would you like to return?”

(She digs around in her purse and retrieves some red earrings in an obviously opened and mangled package.)

Me: “I’m sorry, but earrings are an item we consider non-returnable, just for health reasons. I hope you understand.”

Customer: “But I need the money now. I don’t like these earrings and I want my money back.”

(I should point out that the customer is well-dressed with a new manicure and expensive handbag; these are $10 earrings.)

Me: “I’m sorry, but please understand that we can’t sell used earrings.”

Customer: “But I have a receipt!”

(The customer pulls out a torn piece of a manila folder that says, “[Shop] receipt one pair earrings $10,” in red pen.)

Me: “I’m afraid I can’t accept this; it’s not… exactly…” *trails off, at a loss for words*

Customer: “I hate you! I hate you! I hate this shop. I’m never coming back!”

(The woman grabbed a bow off the counter and threw it at me, grabbed her earrings, and stormed out the door.)

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