This Is No Time To Be Calling

, , , , | Right | November 8, 2018

(I have closed and locked the door for the night, and am counting the till and doing closing duties. The lights are mostly off and the hours are clearly visible on the door. I hear something rattle the door, pause, rattle harder, then pound on it. I am just out of view of it, but I poke my head out to see a dark form in the doorway. I choose to ignore it until the phone rings. Curious, I answer.)

Me: “[Store]. We closed at 7:30. This is [My Name].”

Customer: “Hi. I’m trying to get in but the door is locked.”

Me: “Yes, sir, we closed at 7:30.”

Customer: “What time is it?”

Me: “7:48.”

Customer: “Well, you’re still there; can you let me in?”

Me: “No, sir, I stopped being paid three minutes ago. Our hours are on the door; feel free to come back when we’re open.”

(I hung up after that. He called back several times and I didn’t answer. Curious to see what messages he left for my coworkers.)

“It’s Their Culture” Is No Longer Valid Currency

, , , , | Right | November 4, 2018

(I work at a gift shop directly on a cruise terminal, and it’s not unusual for people to come in looking to either break up big bills or trade smaller bills for the larger ones. My coworker and I are both female and in our early twenties, as are most of my other coworkers. There are seventeen females to every three males so it’s common not to have a male present. A gentleman of East Indian descent comes into the store, looks at the people in it, looks at my coworker and me behind the counter, looks at the other people again, and reluctantly turns back to us.)

Coworker: “Hello, sir! Do you have a question?”

Customer: *looks around again, still looking a bit puzzled* “Is it just you two girls working?”

Coworker: “Yes, sir. Do you need any help?”

Customer: “So, there’s no one else? Not your grandfather?”

(It should be noted that while it is a family business, neither of us recognize the man, and she has been working there for seven years and me for three; we don’t know how he knows to ask for her grandfather.)

Coworker: “No, sir, but my father, the manager, is right outside.”

Customer: “Okay.” *leaves without a backward glance*

(Both my coworker and I are thinking that there’s a problem with the washroom or something else that he would be uncomfortable talking about to a woman. He later comes in with our manager to get rid of small bills. That is all he does. Both my coworker and I are a little peeved, to say the least. It’s not just that he thought we couldn’t do it, but he didn’t even ask because we’re women. After he leaves, my manager can see we’re a little upset.)

Manager: “It’s just his culture.”

Me: *softly to my coworker* “Yes, I understand. Because we have uteruses, we absolutely cannot do simple addition!”

A Different Kind Of Cartographer

, , , , | Right | November 1, 2018

(The store where I work is very small and has lots of small breakable items, with rather narrow aisles just big enough for a wheelchair. One morning, a woman comes in pushing an oversized shopping cart, the kind used in hardware stores for lumber. She barrels it in through the door and into a display.)

Me: “Excuse me, ma’am? I’m afraid we don’t have the room for that cart in here.”

Customer: “What do you mean? I purposefully brought it here to shop!”

Me: “There’s just not enough room to maneuver it around.”

Customer: “Well, that’s ridiculous! I guess you don’t want my business.”

(With this, she left. I ran after her, asking her to take the cart, but she just flounced down the street and disappeared around the corner. The cart was blocking the entrance to the store, so I maneuvered it back outside, and temporarily left it on the sidewalk while I figured out what to do. I called our store owner, who arrived a half hour later. We decided to call the big box hardware store whose name was on the cart. It turned out the closest location was a seven-mile walk away. The owner called someone with a pickup to come get the cart, but while we waited, the local patrol cop came in to ask why there was a huge cart blocking the sidewalk. The cart ended up barely fitting in the pick-up truck. A few weeks later, that same cop came by to tell us that the woman had brought the same kind of giant cart to another downtown business, this time a jeweller. We started worrying that it was some sort of scam, but nothing was stolen in either case. Why she was walking a giant cart miles down the street to shop at tiny stores remains a mystery.)

Kicking Up A Desert Storm

, , , , | | Right | May 22, 2018

(A customer comes in. He is a short, stocky man, and very loud, but for the most part personable… until checkout comes up.)

Customer: “So, do you guys have a military discount?”

Me: “Sorry, sir, we do not have one.”

Customer: “Well, there should be one! I fought in Desert Storm. I deserve a discount for this!”

Me: “I really am sorry. The only discount we have is…”

(I explain the terms of our discount. The guy rifles through his wallet, and it turns out he has a discount card for our store.)

Me: “All right, that is 10% off!”

(He pays, complaining the whole time, but after I help him bag up his purchase…)

Customer: “So, if you’re not doing anything after work, I have a party I am going to…”

About To Start A Star Trek War, Part 5

, , , , , , | Working | April 27, 2018

(My husband and one of his coworkers have to go to DC for a special training course. During their downtime, they go to the Smithsonian. As they’re leaving, my husband stops by the gift shop to pick up a souvenir for me. He finds a pizza cutter that looks like the USS Enterprise and decides to buy it.)

Husband: “[Coworker], look!” *holds up pizza cutter* “Isn’t this cool? My wife is going to love this.”

Coworker: *confused* “But I thought you guys liked Star Wars?”

Husband: “Though she prefers Star Trek and I prefer Star Wars, we like both.”

Coworker: *shocked* “That’s heresy! You’re not supposed to like BOTH!”

(He said she persisted with, “You can’t like both! You’re not supposed to like both!” until they got back to the hotel and went to their rooms. When he relayed the story to me, we both had a good laugh about it. I’ll never understand people who don’t believe that you can like both franchises.)

About To Start A Star Trek War, Part 4
About To Start A Star Trek War, Part 3
About To Start A Star Trek War, Part 2

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