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MLK, FYI

, , , , , | Working | June 17, 2026

Back in the day, my company announced a new holiday, MLK Day (MLK Day wasn’t new, but my company recognizing it as a paid holiday was!).

I work from home, and sometime mid-day (on MLK Day) popped in just to check my email. I noticed a WFH coworker was “green” in whatever we used for Teams back in the day (some long-forgotten instant messaging client). So, I messaged her.

Me: “Hey, you know today’s a holiday, right?”

Coworker: “Ha ha, very funny.”

Me: “No, seriously. It’s MLK Day. Here.”

I sent her a link to the company memo.

Coworker: “Son of a b****! I’ve been working all day! I was wondering why everything was so quiet!”

Fast forward one year, and I was WFH. I was so engrossed in completing a project that was so close to completion that it was almost a jump-scare when I got an IM from that same coworker.

Coworker: “You know it’s MLK day, right?”

Me: “Oh my God! You’re right! And I didn’t even notice why it was so quiet!”

She retired about ten years ago. Almost every year, on MLK Day, one of us will text the other:

Coworker: “Hey, you know today’s a holiday, right?”

Arguing Over A Poultry Sum

, , , , , , | Right | June 17, 2026

I used to work at a grocery store that had a policy of “if the price on the shelf is different than what it rings up at the register, you get it for free”. 

A lady came in one day and bought a package of frozen breaded chicken patties. They were pre-packaged and included a big orange “$2.99” price sticker in the corner (the sticker was put on by the distributor, before it even got to our store). That week, they were on sale for $2.50.

Customer: “I should get these free!”

Me: “What do you mean?”

Customer: “The sign says it’s supposed to be $2.99! You’re charging me $2.50! That’s different, so I get it free!”

Me: “But you’re being charged less than the signed price?”

Customer: “Don’t matter. Different is different.”

I call over my manager, who listens to the customer complaint and tries to reason with her. Eventually:

Manager: “Ma’am, we both know what you’re trying to do here. The only price change I will authorize here is allowing you to pay the sticker price you’re oh-so-adamantly trying to uphold. So, $2.99 plus tax comes to…”

Customer: “—Fine! I’ll pay your d*** price, but you know I’m right! I’m gonna write in and tell them all about y’all!”

I guess she did write in because a month later the signs had been changed to “if the price on the shelf is higher than what it rings up at the register, you get it for free”. Cue a bunch of other customers directing some mockery of the sign at me, asking who would argue for a lower price at the checkout?

I hated that policy…

Steaking Your Claim

, , , , , , | Right | June 17, 2026

After I left active-duty service, serving on board a ship, all I wanted to do was drive, so in 1999, I got a driving job delivering meat in Southern California. It was a tough job, dealing with traffic, and my schedule was always tight with sixteen to twenty deliveries each day to local markets.

I was mostly given inner-city routes with markets with limited space for mid-size delivery trucks.

One of my weekly stops was a small market owned and run by an Iraqi immigrant. I will call him “Ali”.

Ali was always scheduled to be my fifth or sixth stop and would always complain to me why I would show up that late (after 9 AM each time). He said he wanted to be the first one of the day.

I told him I knew he opened each day after 8:00 AM each weekday and that I start my route at about 6:15 AM, plus I don’t schedule my route. If he wanted to make sure he was the first delivery of the day, he would have to call “Steve”, our delivery route supervisor.

Ali, in fact, called Steve because the very next week I received special instructions that read: “Make sure Ali’s Market is your first delivery of the day.” I had my normal amount of stops that day, about eighteen, and I knew they all would be pushed back at least two hours because I knew Ali would not open until 8 AM, and he would not open the rear door until an hour later (the rear door was for deliveries and trash bin access).

I began driving at my usual time. I arrived at Ali’s market fifteen minutes later. Ali’s market is closed, I have my orders, and I will make sure Ali’s market is the first one of the day. I park and wait.

8 AM came, and Ali showed up. He drove his old Benz around the back of my truck, parked, and walked inside through the back door. I wait for him to open the front door, and he ignores me. He was busy pretending to supervise the cashier, intentionally ignoring me, so I walked to the meat counter at the back. The guy tells me he was not allowed to take deliveries, that I had to wait for Mr. Ali. At this point, I could have gone to make two or three deliveries and then return, but I had my very specific order.

As I was walking towards the front to exit the market, I grabbed a newspaper, paid for it, and then told Ali, who was just standing there looking at me, “Let me know when you are ready to take your order, you know where I parked.”

Ali didn’t say a word; he was apparently taking revenge for all these years for his small city market not being the #1 priority of a meat distributor who delivered beef, pork, chicken, cheese, and other refrigerated products from over twelve distribution points throughout the United States.

Steve arrived at his desk right after 10 AM. The first thing he saw on his computer screen was an alert of my truck sitting inert for four hours. He called me all in a rage, demanding I explain to him why my truck was sitting for all that time, and I explained that I was following his order to make sure I deliver to Ali’s market first.

Steve hung up and called Ali. Whatever Steve told Ali made Ali get his whiny butt out of his crappy little market and take delivery of his meat order, about fourteen boxes of product, if I recall correctly.

I then began to rush through the rest of my stops, not wasting time at all, and at the end of my day, I was the last driver back to the warehouse. I got an extra $80 on overtime because Ali cried for not being the first delivery of the day.

I never returned to see Ali again. Apparently, we dropped his whiny butt as a customer.

Ale Never Learn

, , , | Right | June 17, 2026

I’ll out myself on this one!

About ten years ago, I had a group of friends who would meet once a month at a bar for some beers. When we met in June, one of the beers on tap was a summer shandy (beer mixed with lemonade). I was intrigued, so I got one… And hated it.

When the server asked how everything was, I mentioned it, but figured I’d just drink it since it was my mistake. I was grateful when the server offered to get me something else. So, I went with my go-to, a stout.

I think that was the first time I ever had an item replaced when I was out, unless the server/kitchen had made an error on my order. It never dawned on me that simply not liking what I ordered was sufficient reason to get something else.

Fast forward a month, and I had a Groundhog Day moment.

I looked over the beers on tap. Saw the summer shandy and thought… That sounds interesting. So, I ordered it.

As soon as I took my first sip, my memory of the previous month flooded back. I totally intended to suck it up since this really was my bad. The server, however, happened to be at the table when I took that first sip and noticed my grimace.

He asked if I wanted something else. I explained my brain fart and told him it’s okay, but he insisted. So I got my stout again. He got a good tip.

Never made that mistake again! You can teach an old dog new tricks!

Paw-ning Off Responsibility

, , , , , | Related | June 17, 2026

My brother calls me at night, which means he needs something.

Brother: “Can you look after my dog this weekend?”

Me: “You ask me to do that so many weekends that my kids are going to think it’s our dog.”

Brother: “I can’t help it. I have an important trip.”

Me: “An important trip that you couldn’t plan for and arrange pet boarding?”

Brother: “It happened last minute.”

Me: “An important trip on the same weekend as Coachella?”

Brother: “Uh…”

Me: “Look, your dog is cute and my kids love him, but it’s obvious you got a dog because he looks good on your Instagram, not because you were serious about looking after a dog. I’ll take him this weekend, but if I see a single photo on your socials about you being at Coachella this weekend, I’m keeping the dog forever.”

Brother: “…”

Me: “…”

Brother: “I’ll ask Mom and Dad.” *Click.*

A few months later, I did indeed end up ‘inheriting’ the dog, as having to look after a loving and living being was far too inconvenient to the festival season…