Your Professor Is Not Professor. X

, , , | Learning | August 16, 2017

(During every lecture, our professor gives us a two question quiz on paper, which you hand in at the end. You would think after successfully completing thirteen years of school, students would know to put their name on anything they are handing in, but alas, they apparently have not learned. At the end of lecture:)

Professor: “Make sure you put your name on it! I do hold it up to the light and try to feel your psychic signature, but if that doesn’t work… it goes straight in the bin.”

Life Lessons

, , , , | Hopeless | August 9, 2017

I am a college sophomore. I am back home for winter break so I decide to visit my old high school to catch up with some of my former teachers. There was one teacher in particular who had made an extremely significant mark on my life when I was younger and I am excited to see her. She’s one of those really energetic teachers who jumps on desks and stuff. She’s teaching a class when I show up so I wait for the bell to ring.

As soon as she sees me in the doorway, she actually SCREAMS my last name and sprints across the room to give me a hug. Her next English class starts to filter in, and to my surprise, she skips the lesson and asks me to talk to them about college instead. We have a long and fun lesson where I assure them of the merits of learning MLA and proper writing skills, which pleases the teacher immensely.

After the class we have a long private discussion about life and politics and such, and she gives me some much-needed advice. I was a bit of a rebel in high school and didn’t get very good grades, but now I’m about to graduate college having been on the dean’s list almost every semester and already working in my intended field. It all goes to show what an impact some teachers can have on your life long after you leave their class.

Both Sound Inappropriate

, , , , | Learning | August 9, 2017

(We are talking about low-level disruption, largely because the teachers are sick of it.)

Teacher: “Off-topic discussions, teachers stroke students—”

Student: “Teachers stroke students?”

(The class laughs.)

Teacher: “Teachers SLASH students.”

Me: “Teachers slash students?”

(Now that was an off-topic discussion.)

A Testing Set Of Circumstances

, , | CT, USA | Learning | July 11, 2017

We have an impossible physics teacher. Everyone hates him, but he always specifically targets me. He always give us Scantron tests, which I always fail. This one, however, is the worst, with questions terribly phrased.

When I point this out to him and ask what to do, he simply tells me to “figure it out.”

There is even one question that asks about the velocity of a bicycle, and all the answers are about a rock rolling down a hill. The test is a total disaster, and he refuses to do anything about it.

At the end of the class, one of my classmates asks if he can keep a copy of the test to help him study for the final, and the teacher says no. So, he ends up stealing a copy, and during lunch most of the class get together and mark everything that is wrong with the test to give to the vice principal.

She was beside herself that the test was like that, and forced the teacher to give us all an extra 50 points on the test. It was the only one I passed all year.

Graded A Bee Plus

, , , , , , | Learning | June 15, 2017

(During my senior year of high school, I sign up to take a class called ‘Preschool Lab.’ It is a class where we teach pre-schoolers between the ages of three to five, and create weekly lesson plans. This class is mainly for students who are either planning on going into early childhood education or are thinking about it. Although this class is a lot of fun and I enjoy working with the children and seeing them grow, the teacher can come off as rude every once in a while if we do something that is beyond her expectations, especially when it comes to their art projects. It is the first day of preschool class during the spring semester and we have two new students who have just turned three years old and are also twins. They are the youngest while the other students are between the ages of four and five. A lot of my classmates and teachers are frustrated with the twins because they do their own thing but they begin to become attached to me and only want to work with me. One day we are working on creating bumblebees and I am helping one of the twins create hers. She puts one eye near the top of the paper and the other eye near the nose. Since my teacher likes all of the projects to be the exact same way and “perfect,” I open my mouth to correct her but when she smiles proudly and is so excited that she put the eyes on by herself, I don’t have the heart to tell her it is wrong. I don’t think it will be a big deal, since she did everything else correctly, so I decide to praise her.)

Me: “[Twin #1]! I love your bumblebee. It’s so good! Well done!”

(As I say this, I notice the classmate next to me look over at it and frown, then get up to talk to the teacher. The twin begins laughing and turns around to show her sister, who also did the eyes a little unevenly but is also really proud of herself. When I hear my teacher clear her throat behind me, I look up and to my surprise, she looks furious.)

Teacher: “[Classmate], help [Twin #1] and [Twin #2] fix the eyes while I talk to [My Name] outside.”

(My classmate tries to help the twins fix their artwork but they immediately put their hands on their artwork to prevent her and start to cry. When I get in the hallway, my teacher glares at me and I know what is about to happen.)

Teacher: “[My Name], you know all of the pre-schooler’s projects have to be exactly the same. Why on earth would you encourage those twins to do their projects incorrectly?”

Me: “They are proud of their artwork and I wasn’t going to discourage them just because it isn’t the same as the other classmates.”

Teacher: “But I expect you to! If the parents saw that their artwork were different from the other students, they will start to think their children are stupid and can’t do a simple task!”

(I have met the twins’ parents multiple times and I know for a fact they would want me to encourage their children, no matter how different their work turns out from their classmates.)

Me: “I’m sorry but they were proud of themselves for finishing their artwork and when [Classmate] tried to correct them, they got upset. Not every student’s artwork has to be the exactly the same as each other and it doesn’t mean they are stupid. I’m not going to discourage them over a little mistake when they did everything else correctly.”

Teacher: *sighs* “I don’t think the twins are adjusting to the preschool. I think it’s time for me to talk to the parents to consider pulling them out and when they see their bumblebees I’m sure they will see where I’m coming from. In the future, [My Name], make sure that EVERY project is exactly the same as the other students and that they are perfect. I’m afraid I’m going to have to deduct points from you today for not following instructions.”

(When we go back into the classroom, I notice the twins are still crying and refusing to let my classmate fix their bees, and when my teacher instructs my classmate to let it go, she moves on to the next kid. When I sit back down next to the twins, they show me their bees again and I smile at them and tell them they did a very good job while ignoring the glares my classmate and teacher are giving me. When the class is over, my teacher pulls the twins’ parents aside to talk to them about how the twins aren’t adjusting, but when they see their parents, the twins grab their artwork and run over to them.)

Twin #1: “Mommy, Daddy! Look, I made a bee!”

Twin #2: “Look at my bumblebee, Mommy and Daddy!”

(The parents look at the bumblebees and look at the teacher, and back at the twins, and say:)

Mother: “Oh, [Twin #1] and [Twin #2], these are beautiful bees! I love the way the eyes are!”

Father: “Wow! These are perfect bees and are going right on our fridge! Good job, girls!”

Teacher: “But do you see why I don’t think the girls are ready for preschool? See how uneven the eyes are compared to the other student’s bees?”

Father: “Of course they are going to be different from the other students! They just turned three. It’s not going to be perfect but that doesn’t mean they aren’t ready for preschool!”

Mother: “We are very proud of our girls for attempting it and we want our daughter’s artwork to stand out from the other students. If you don’t believe in our children like we do then I don’t think this is the right preschool for us.”

Father: “Come on, girls! How about we take you out for a little ice cream for doing a good job today at preschool?”

(Before my teacher could open her mouth to argue, the parents grabbed their stuff and left the classroom. Surprisingly the twins did come back the next day and by the end of the semester, they were probably the most creative students out of the entire class. Even though my teacher never apologized to me or gave me my points back, the twins still insisted to only work with me and she never again criticized me or deducted points from me for letting them do their own thing!)

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