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Saved By Petty Revenge

, , , , | Learning | CREDIT: thatburghfan | November 18, 2022

When I was in college, I took a class called Conceptions of Human Existence. I was so, so lost. I like classes with facts, and if it had not been a required class, I would never have gone near this subject.

On the first test, I got a C- and I learned that nobody got a lower grade. This was an ominous sign that I was in trouble. I just could not absorb the vague, nebulous concepts being discussed.

It was like getting a test question, “Does our worldview affect the world or is it the opposite?” and being told my answer was wrong. How the heck should I know? It was complete and total frustration.

Around the halfway point of the semester, our professor was about ten minutes late to class. He came in just at the point when we were all getting up to leave.

Professor: “Please sit. This will be short. I’ve just left a meeting with the department chairperson, and I was denied tenure.”

We could tell he was angry about it. Then, the class was dismissed.

For the rest of the term, our classes just involved chatting about topics in the news and no actual assignments to do. I was left wondering what I could do to pull up my grade. With a week to go before the final exams, [Professor] let us know that we had to do a final exam. Great, should I have been taking notes during our class-wide chats? What the heck were we going to be tested on?

Professor: “Since I didn’t get tenure, I’m leaving the university after this semester. Your final exam will be a take-home essay, and you can choose one of three topics. The first is your feelings about the war on terrorism. The second is your feelings on the American healthcare system. And third, if you don’t like either of those topics, you can make up your own question and answer it. If you turn in anything that shows effort, you will be given an A. I do have to be able to defend my grades, so don’t just turn in a two-sentence piece of crap and think that’s worth an A. Put in some effort and get a guaranteed A. I am doing this for all the classes I teach this semester.”

That was his malicious compliance for being turned down for tenure. We did, in fact, all get an A.

I heard later from a student aide who worked in the office that the department head was mad about it but couldn’t do anything about it.

Final Exams Are Stressful; That’s The Nature Of The Beast

, , , , , , | Learning | November 15, 2022

It’s final exam time. I give an exam on a Thursday. One student doesn’t show up. Well, this happens. The student fails the course because they really needed some points from the final exam to get a passing grade, and that didn’t happen. I continue to grade all the things.

On Sunday night, I get an email from that same student with a question about a zero for a quiz grade from a few weeks before. They don’t say anything about the final exam, so I decide I’m obligated to acknowledge it.

Me: “You got a zero for the quiz because it was a closed-book take-home quiz, and you quoted the textbook and included page numbers. You can’t use a book; that’s cheating, and the consequence is a zero for the assignment. Also, you weren’t at the final exam, and therefore, you got a zero for it.”

Student: “I was very stressed out! I couldn’t come to the final. I will come tomorrow at 6:00 pm to take it.”

Me: “I’m not available tomorrow evening. Without discussing this in advance, I’m afraid no makeup exam is possible.”

The student then emails me, their advisor, and two other administrative people:

Student: “This email is to inform you that I am suing [My Name] because she didn’t grant me accommodations to retake my final exam.”

I don’t know what came of all this, but I did not get sued.

Guess You’ll Just Have To Find Someone Who Actually Works Here

, , , , , , | Right | CREDIT: Tallchick8 | November 14, 2022

When I was at university, I took a Woman’s Studies course. We had a paper to write about gender differences within the toy industry and early childhood development.

My childhood dream of spending three and a half hours in a toy store was way less fun when I realized it as an adult.

For our paper, we had to go to a toy store and make a detailed map of the entire store  — which sections were next to which other sections, etc. Then, we had to go and find two items in each section and rate them on four different criteria. Finally, we had to go and ask a store employee to give advice on what toy we should get for a fictional four-year-old boy/girl.

I went to a now bankrupt big box toy store. I had a clipboard, and I first went around and made a detailed map of the store. Then, I went back and created my itemized list and started categorizing two toys per section in each of the four criteria. As you can imagine, this took quite a while.

Occasionally, as I was doing my task, people would ask me questions. Since I had just made a map, I was able to answer quite a few of their questions.

Me: “The stuffed animals, ma’am? That’s aisle four, right next to the doll houses.”

Me: “You’re looking for a microscope? That would be in educational toys in the far right corner of the store, next to the grow-your-own crystal set.”

One customer asked:

Customer: “Where are the tricycles? And the bicycles?”

I promptly told them the difference between each section. They went to look and came back.

Customer: “Can you get me a different color from the back?”

Me: “Oh, I don’t actually work here. I’m just a student doing a project.”

They rolled their eyes and left in a huff, and I could tell that they thought I was just a lazy employee with a clipboard.

Wish You Could’ve Phoned It In, But No Phones Allowed

, , , , | Learning | November 13, 2022

I am taking accounting for my business degree, and my teacher is probably the most uptight teacher I have had in years. He is a stickler for language and has a “no phones allowed in class or you are buying me doughnuts” policy — the usual signs of a migraine-inducing professor.

This beginning-of-semester assignment takes the cake, though.

He tells everyone that we have a MANDATORY meeting all the way across town for a business convention and that we need to have a “very good reason to not attend”.

This meeting is an hour’s drive away at 6:00 pm. He keeps talking about how important it is, and I stress about dressing nice and appearing on time ready to answer questions.

The day comes.

I show up and there are a total of ten booths, most of them trying to advertise their tax companies to us.

I spend five minutes there and get my pamphlet and myself put on the grade, and then I leave.

I missed out on a lot of homework time for this.

His Career Is Over Before It Even Starts

, , , , | Learning | November 11, 2022

I attend university for animation. At the moment, I’m in my senior year, which means senior capstones are in full swing. Senior capstones (senior thesis films at some schools) are a big deal. We had to do official pitches for our films. Then, some were “nominated” and we had to assemble teams of ten students to work on films for the next year. 

It is a hefty process, and there was a mad scramble in the week we had to “recruit” or be recruited. A lot of films were not greenlit due to a lack of people, and a lot of students were either rejected from films or were on those teams that were dissolved too late to join another film.

Enter [Classmate]. During the “recruiting” week, [Classmate] was on one film and then jumped ship onto another. 

When the director/pitcher of the first film announced that they were no longer trying to be greenlit and had decided to try to let their team find new members in a group chat that all of the rising seniors were in, [Classmate] went into the group chat and publicly said:

Classmate: “Oh, no, I’m so sorry! I only switched films because the film I’m currently on had more opportunity for me to animate characters! Is there any way to rejoin your film if this one doesn’t work out?”

This was not received well by the group chat.

Fast forward to now. We are now two weeks into the new school year, in preproduction, and working on getting everything ready so we can actually begin animating. At this point, we have all received important information such as deliverables and assigned roles, and we generally have a lot of important work done on our films.

[Classmate] suddenly messages after months of inactivity in the group chat:

Classmate: “Is it possible to switch capstones?”

The ENTIRE chat immediately erupts in disbelief. Many people ask him how he has the audacity to be so disrespectful to ask this kind of question publicly.

The reason he has decided to try to jump ship (AGAIN)? The team he was on made a plot change that he didn’t like. 

Keep in mind that we have spent YEARS at this point having classes where almost all the professors have drilled one thing into our minds: “Your professional career doesn’t start when you leave [University]; it starts now. These are going to be your professional peers.” 

And yet, in a chat with over 300 people in it, here [Classmate] goes, advertising not once but TWICE that he is unreliable and will jump ship at the first sign of something not going the way he wants it to.

We’re barely two weeks into this year-long film, and [Classmate] has already managed to ruin his professional reputation among all of the students that are about to graduate, be his peers, and be people who can recommend him to jobs.