A Cent-less Waste Of Time, Part 2

, , , , , | Right | August 13, 2020

I am shopping for a couple of items in a supermarket chain with only one till open. I am happy to see only one person ahead of me — an old man in his sixties — and he seems to be done. However, he then unbags his goods and takes out his receipt.

Old Man: “I’ve been overcharged!”

The staff member looks at his goods and runs them through manually as they are all half-price discounts, and the amount tallies with what was on the receipt.

Old Man: “I’ve still been overcharged!”

I start looking at his goods and add up to the clearly-labeled price to £2.79, which is what is on the receipt. The man starts complaining even more that he is being ripped off, and three more staff arrive, but nobody can figure out what is wrong.

Old Man: “I should have been charged £2.60!”

Bear in mind that one of the items is 49p and all the rest are round numbers. By now, there is a long queue and I am sick of this bickering. I speak to one of the staff.

Me: “If he causing all this grief over 19p, then take this 20p coin from my pocket!”

I turn to the man with it.

Me: “Take it and please leave because the rest of us want to finish our shopping.”

Old Man: “No, I want my money from them.”

I pointed out that he was getting his items half-price or better, but he still argued that he was being ripped off. The staff sadly then gave in and gave him 19p from the till. I just hope I cheered them up when I shouted, “Miserable git!” at the man as he left.

A Cent-less Waste Of Time

Hey, Mister, Where You Headed? Are You In A Hurry?

, , , , , , | Working | August 13, 2020

Years ago, I used to make a regular run between two cities for the company I worked for. Frequently, I picked up hitchhikers. 

Hitchhiker: “Where are you headed?”

Me: “[City].”

Hitchhiker: “Great! The [Bus Company] driver knows me and he was being an a**hole and stranded me here. When do you expect to get to [City]?”

Me: “[Time].”

Hitchhiker: “Are you sure?”

Me: “Oh, yeah. I know my route pretty well.”

Hitchhiker: *Laughing* “We’ll beat the bus back. I’ll go talk to the station master when we arrive and I’ll tell him what the jerk did. The proof will be my luggage on the bus.”

I used to drive like a bat out of h***, so I beat the bus by about an hour. My return trip was 225 miles and we passed the bus on the highway before reaching the town. I don’t know how it turned out, as I dropped him off at the depot when we got in.

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Not Very Closed-Minded, Part 39

, , , | Right | August 13, 2020

The store I work at closes at 11:00 pm. Even though it’s been like that for years, people still show up at the last minute. Many times, we’ve had to turn people away because we’re closed and ready to go home. It’s a small store, so all the registers are right next to the front door. It’s 11:10, so, of course, we have already turned the sliding door off. I am pulling the very last cash drawer when suddenly someone starts forcing the doors open.

Customer: “Can I get a bottle of booze?”

Me: “No, sir, we closed ten minutes ago.”

Customer: “Why?”

Me: “Because we close at 11:00.”

Customer: “Since when?”

Me: “Six years ago.”

Customer: “How was I supposed to know you were closed?”

Me: “You had to forcibly open the sliding doors that were turned off.”

Customer: “Whatever. You’re a b****, anyway.”

Me: “I’m okay with that. You still need to leave.”

Customer: “Fine.”

He mumbled something about bad customer service on his way out.

Not Very Closed Minded, Part 38
Not Very Closed Minded, Part 37
Not Very Closed Minded, Part 36
Not Very Closed Minded, Part 35
Not Very Closed Minded, Part 34

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Mom Sets Another Unrealistic Expectation

, , , , | Related | August 12, 2020

My mother has a bad habit of changing subjects mid-conversation and then getting upset that we haven’t followed along with her train of thought. 

We are talking about a recent illness outbreak that is not very far from us. She then mentions that they had a lady come out to care for my invalid father, that she didn’t wear a mask, and that she mentioned that she had been to the outbreak hotspot that day so they had made a complaint to the care providers.

Mother: “She recently had a baby; she should have known better. She named him Joe. Joe! Joe’s got lung cancer that’s gone to his brain.”

I am horrified to hear that about a baby.

Me: “Oh, my God! Was he born with it?”

Mum: “What are you talking about?”

Me: “Was the baby born with cancer?”

Mum looks at me as if I am the dumbest person on earth and talks to me the same way.

Mum: “No, you remember Joe, your sister’s stupid ex-husband? That’s who I am talking about. You’re as bad as your father; he never listens to me, either.

Me: “What did you expect? One moment you are talking about a baby named Joe and the next you tell me that Joe has cancer. I couldn’t tell that you were talking about two different people.”

Mum just shrugged. She can’t understand how we get so frustrated with her when she does things like this. It makes sense to her, so why wouldn’t it make sense to others?

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An Obvious Sign Of Laziness

, , , , , , | Right | August 12, 2020

Customer: “So, that sign over there says you need the store card to get the sale price.”

Me: “Yes?”

Customer: “Does that mean I have to have the card?”

Me: *Slowly, disbelieving* “If the sign says you need the card… do you need the card?”

Customer: *In a “duh” voice* “Yeah?!”

Me: “Yes.”

Customer: “That’s not fair! I’m not from here! I don’t have the card!”

Me: “You can fill out the form to get the card at the customer service desk.”

Customer: “No, that’s idiotic! I can’t be bothered to go to all that trouble! And I don’t want to go the trouble of carrying your stupid card around!”

Me: “Then I’m afraid you’ll have to pay full price, sir.”

Customer: “Well, how was I supposed to know that?!”

Me: “That’s what the sign is there for.”

Customer: “No! That’s too confusing!”

Me: “You’re right. We really should have a sign that explains it.”

He slams the package of cheese he’s been asking about down on my counter before walking away.

Customer: “F****** smarta** motherf*****!”

I got written up for that, but I’d do it again ten times out of ten.

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