Customer: “I want a [sandwich] with [long list of extra ingredients].”

We make the sandwich for him, but he comes back without taking a bite. Instead, he has written out a list.

Customer: “Here is a list of things that I disliked about it. I also want you to save this sandwich in a box so that the highest-level manager sees it.”

The list contained over twenty items, including, “The cheese has melted in a way so that not all of the meat has been covered,” and, “The beef tasted like it came from a cow that was sad.”

We just threw the sandwich away, but we kept the list up on the notice board at the back to give everyone a good chuckle.

Related:
Sub-Standard Sub-Service, Part 8
Sub-Standard Sub-Service, Part 7
Sub-Standard Sub-Service, Part 6
Sub-Standard Sub-Service, Part 5
Sub-Standard Sub-Service, Part 4

I am working in a chain sandwich shop, inside a larger grocery store.

Customer: “I want a [sandwich], but no meat.”

Me: “Okay, so the vegetarian option?”

Customer: “Yeah, but no veggies.”

Me: “And cheese?”

Customer: “No cheese.”

Me: “Uh… okay, and dressings?”

Customer: “No dressings.”

Me: “Sir, I have to say, you’re just going to spend $7.25 on just bread.”

Customer: “Uh… I guess so, yeah, just bread. Can you toast it, please?”

Me: “Sir, why don’t you just go to [Grocery Store], which you are currently in, and buy an entire loaf of bread for like two bucks?”

Customer: “But then I’d have to toast it myself.”

Me: “Yes, but you’d have a lot more bread for less than a third of the cost.”

Customer: “That’s too much work.”

I hope he enjoyed his seven-dollar plain toasted bread roll.

I worked at a sandwich store in the early 1990s. The store did their own deliveries. An Army base was close by, and they were the majority of deliveries. We had this one regular guy who always had the same complaint.

Caller: “I didn’t get enough jalapeños!”

The next time he ordered, we put in one-and-a-half times the usual jalapeños without charging extra.

Caller: “You guys are either stupid or cheap! I still didn’t get enough jalapeños!”

After a few more complaints and rude words, I made his next order by pouring some of the jalapeño juice and tons of seeds from the jalapeño bin onto the bread.

The following week:

Caller: “Go light on jalapeños.”

CONTENT WARNING: Abusive Parenting

I am working at a sandwich shop. A woman walks in with her timid-looking teenage daughter.

Customer: “I’ll have the six-inch [sandwich].”

She completes her order and then pushes her daughter to the front.

Customer: “Order your sandwich.”

The daughter is unable to make eye contact, she’s visibly distressed, and she looks like she’s trying to mouth some words, but I can’t hear anything.

Me: “I’m so sorry, I didn’t catch that.”

The daughter suddenly starts crying and turns to leave. Her mother tries to get in her way.

Customer: “Oh, no, you don’t! Honestly, it’s a simple sandwich! Just order it! How are you not embarrassed to be this way?!”

Me: “If you know her order, ma’am, I can take it from you. Or she can write it down if—”

Customer: “No! She has to get over this ‘social anxiety’ thing! This is because these kids spend all their time on screens and never interacting with other actual humans!” *To her daughter* “Order your food, or you’ll get nothing.”

The daughter pauses, looks at me for a split second, starts crying again, and rushes to the exit.

Customer: “Ugh! Probably off to cry to her ‘friends’ on her K-Pop forums. Anyway, can I get an application form or a link to your online vacancies?”

Me: “Are you interested in applying for a job here, ma’am?

Customer: “Me?! Oh, God, no! It’s for my daughter! She needs to get a job out in the real world so she can get over her social cowardice!”

Me: “Ma’am, if her social anxiety is so bad that she can’t even order food, then I don’t think working in a place where she has to interact with strangers all day taking their food orders is going to be a good fit for her.”

Customer: “She’s never going to get over this ‘social anxiety’ nonsense if she doesn’t put in the work! If she stays comfortable all the time, she’ll never grow out of it!”

Me: “I’m not qualified to comment, but I don’t think she’ll enjoy working here.”

Customer: “Nonsense! It’s work; you’re not meant to enjoy it! Do you actually enjoy this job?”

Me: “Not at this very moment, no…”

CONTENT WARNING: Violence (Customer threatens/attempts to stab an employee)

I worked at a sandwich place located inside a mall, but not attached to any other stores. This is important, as there is another branch of the same chain located INSIDE of a store that is open later due to the store itself being open later.

I am counting down the drawer, thirty minutes past close, when I hear a tapping. I look at the door to find a lady smiling and waving at me.

I mouth through the door that we are closed and go back to counting. 

She bangs on the door more insistently, angry now. I go to the door, shout, “We are closed!”, and point to the hours.

She acts like she doesn’t hear, so I give her the benefit of the doubt and do what you should NEVER DO ESPECIALLY WHEN ALONE: I unlock the door to speak with her.

Customer: “Hi. I am so sorry, but I just called here and spoke to someone. You said you would be open until ten, so why are you closed?” 

Me: “Oh. You must have called elsewhere. We are never open past 8:30. I am just here counting the drawer.”

Customer: *Now irate* “No. I called here, and the man on the phone said you were open until ten!” 

Me: “I am going to stop you right there. We haven’t had a man working this restaurant at all today — just women — but also, we have never been open past 8:30 because the mall closes at eight.”

Customer: “So… who did I call, then?!“ 

I know I should have disengaged, but I am a helpful person, and this is my first management job, so I want to do the right thing.

Me: “I am sorry. You would know better than I would who you called. Perhaps call them back to find out their location so you can get your food?”

Customer: “No! They said they were open until ten, so you have to make my food for me!” 

Me: “No…? I cannot. Our systems are shut down, our food is put away, and everything is off. If it were, like, right at close, I could have helped you, but we’ve been closed for over forty-five minutes now.”

Customer: “You will make me my sandwiches because you should be open until ten like your other—”

I closed and locked the door at this and turned around.

The customer lost her s***, shaking and pounding the door. The customers leaving the chain store were concerned and tried to help the banshee, but she kept screaming.

I went to the back, locked myself in the office, and called security, getting worried that she might actually break the door down. On the cameras, I saw her leave finally, and I breathed a sigh of relief, letting security know. They still said they would send someone over to make sure it was safe for me to leave.

Security let themselves into the store mall side and let me know what had happened and that I could leave.

Apparently, the lady had a complete meltdown in the parking lot. She was hiding near the dumpster closest to the store, and she went to knife some poor cashier from one of the restaurants that were open later (a steak place), causing the cashier to lock all the customers inside for their safety and call security.

But that wasn’t the end of the story.

Apparently, before she got caught with the knife at the dumpster, the woman had slashed the tires of all the cars parked near the doorway, thinking one of them had to be mine.

The police arrested her and cleared the area for everyone to leave.

So never, ever open a door for someone past opening hours. You never know what could happen!

Related:
Not So Closed Minded, Part 38
Not So Closed Minded, Part 37
Not So Closed Minded, Part 36
Not So Closed Minded, Part 35
Not So Closed Minded, Part 34