It’s Time To Borrow A New Excuse

, , , , | Right | June 21, 2017

(Our library policy is that you must either provide your library card or a form of photo ID to check out items or use a computer. A patron comes in, selects a few DVDs, and comes up to the front counter.)

Patron: “And I don’t have my library card or my ID, so just look me up by my last name.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but we’re going to need either your library card or your photo ID to check out your items.”

Patron: “You know who I am! I’m in every day! Why can’t you just check me out?”

Me: “I’m sorry; it’s our policy.”

Patron: *points at a new coworker who has only been working a few weeks at this point* “Well, SHE checks me out all the time without my card! Isn’t that right?”

Coworker: *deer-in-headlights look* “Uh…”

Me: “I’m afraid it’s against our policy. Would you like me to hold your DVDs for you, and you can check them out the next time you come in with your card?”

Patron: *angrily throws the DVDs across the counter at me* “Never mind!” *storms out*

(The coworker was apologetic, saying she’d never seen this woman before and had no idea what she’s talking about. Sadly, this isn’t the first time someone has used the “but so-and-so lets me check out without a card” excuse, and it’s unlikely to be the last…)

A Model Racist

, , , , | Right | June 19, 2017

(My mother, my sister, and I are at a store to upgrade my phone. A lady in her 30s and what I assume is her mother walk in and ask to see a model for the new IPhone 6. Worker #1, who is a black man in is 20s, is told by Worker #2 that since they already have a model out, he can’t bring out a second one. Worker #1 tells the woman that he cannot show her the model at this time, and she and her mother go and browse the store. Five minutes later, a black man in his 60s comes up and asks also to see a model of the IPhone 6. Since the other model has been put back, Worker #1 shows it to him. After the man leaves, the lady and her mother storm back up to the counter.)

Customer: “I knew you were a racist!”

Worker #1: “Excuse me, ma’am?”

Customer: “I saw you give that BLACK man the model and not me! Does your manager know its staff is comprised of racists?! I DEMAND to see the manager and have you fired!”

(Worker #1 seems quite shaken up about this, and turns towards the manager, who is helping me and my family upgrade my phone.)

Worker #1: “[Manager] can you come here for a moment?”

Manager: “Excuse me, ladies.”

(The manager walks over and we can hear her trying to explain the situation to the customer, but the customer continues to argue and starts to raise her voice. My sister and I are trying our best to ignore her, but my mother decides to butt in when the lady starts to verbally attack the young man.)

Mother: “Oh, for the love of god! Would you just calm down?! This is obviously not his fault and you are disturbing the peace!”

Customer: “Stay out of this; this isn’t any of your business!”

Mother: “I think you made it EVERYONE’S business when you started screaming like a lunatic!”

(The woman and her mother leave in a huff, grumbling to each other. My mother turns to Worker #1.)

My Mother: “Don’t worry, dear, you did nothing wrong. You seem like an excellent young man, and she was a crazy b****.”

(Worker #1 chuckles and says thank you, and the manager comes back to help us. A tiny, old woman that was standing at the back of the store comes up to the counters and speaks to my mother.)

Old Woman: “Thank you for doing that; she was driving me insane!”

Only Pill They Need Is A Chill Pill

, , , , , | Right | June 16, 2017

(My store usually opens at 10 every morning, except for Sunday on which we open at 1. In order to open the store I have to be there by 12, which sometimes leads to people trying to open the door before realizing we’re closed. Today I show up early and happen to watch someone make their way to the door and try to open it, before heading back to his car. Once his car is running I get out and make my way to the door to open it, but notice the man has gotten out of the car and is following me. Not wanting him to try to follow me inside I turn and smile.)

Me: *smiling brightly* “Hi.”

Customer: “Hi, are you opening?

Me: “Not for another hour, sir.”

Customer: “Oh. Well, can I just run in and grab something real quick?”

Me: “Um… sorry, but we can’t let anyone in the store before we’re open.”

Customer: “But you’re right here! I just need some pills.”

(This is pretty common. As an ‘adult novelty’ store, we sell ‘Herbal Supplements.’)

Me: *still smiling* “Like I said, I can’t let anyone in the store, but if you come back in an hour—”

Customer: *interrupting and starting to yell* “BUT YOU’RE RIGHT F***ING HERE! I DON’T UNDERSTAND WHY YOU CAN’T LET ME GET MY F***ING PILLS!”

Me: *taken back by the sudden flip* “W-well, we’re not—”

Customer: *interrupting again* “LISTEN HERE, YOU LITTLE B****, JUST OPEN THE F***ING DOOR!”

(Just as the customer starts walking towards me, the cop car that tends to patrol the area since we’ve had a few break-ins in the shopping center pulls up.)

Cop: “Is there a problem here?”

Customer: *calming down just a bit* “Yeah, this person’s not letting me in her store!”

Cop: *turning to me* “Are you guys even open yet?”

Me: “No! We don’t open for another hour!”

Customer: “But you’re here, and I just want my pills!”

Me: *fed up, and more confident thanks to the cop* “Well, the credit card machine’s not booted up, I’m not logged into the system, there’s no cash in the till, and it’ll take an hour to even get ready to even take your payment!”

Customer: “But… but… UGH, FINE! But I’m calling your corporate to complain!” *storms off as the cop and I share a look*

(I later learned he did actually complain, but were met with not only laughter, but a ban from our stores for aggressive actions towards a sales rep!)

A Few Shades Of Grey Short

, , , , | Right | June 16, 2017

(An older lady customer with grey hair is being served by my coworker. I come within earshot just in time to witness this:)

Customer: *points to her head* “Just because there’s grey out here doesn’t mean there’s no more grey inside you know! I don’t appreciate being treated like I’m addled! I can think for myself, you know! My brain does still work!”

Coworker: *clearly taken aback* “Of course. I… I wasn’t trying to imply… I’m sorry, ma’am…”

(I’m wondering what the heck my coworker could possibly have said to set this woman off so badly, but she’s not done ranting yet… By this point my coworker has rung through the purchase: one book. We always ask if people want a bag when it’s a small purchase because a lot of people don’t; they’ll just carry it or put it in their own bag.)

Coworker: “So your total is [amount]. Would you like a bag for that?”

Customer: *looks incredulous* “Would I like a bag?! This is just ridiculous! I have NEVER had such horrible service in here! What is going on today?! Of COURSE I would like a bag! What ELSE am I supposed to do?!”

Coworker: “Well, some people have their own bags…”

Customer: *takes a big step back so we can clearly see all of her over the counter, and spreads her arms out wide in the air* “Do I LOOK like I have a bag?! Honestly! This is just ridiculous! I cannot BELIEVE the service in here today!”

Coworker: *handing over the now bagged book* “Here you go. Have a nice day, ma’am.”

Customer: “You, too.”

(Despite still sounding annoyed, she sounded sincere enough when she said “you, too”, which just made the whole thing even stranger. My coworker and I just looked at each other in disbelief as she left.)

You’ll Be The Prints-able One Day

, , , , , | Learning | June 12, 2017

(As part of our degree program we are required to go on a total of three placements, the first of which must be in a school. For my first placement I am put in a grade seven classroom. The kids have just started learning how to use a computer program that allows them to make bridges. In addition to there being a placement student (me) in the class, there is also an EA. This woman is crazy. She is seriously always two seconds away from being raging pissed. The students fear this woman; they find her hilarious, but are respectful. The students are assigned to use this pretty neat bridge building program to make a bridge that follows certain criteria. If they are able to successfully create said bridge, they are to print it out and hand it in and head outside. All is going well with the world, until this one kid, that is. Obviously, despite knowing how to use computers, he was never taught the proper etiquette. By that, I mean if your document doesn’t come out the first time you click print, don’t just keep clicking it fifty million times. However, he doesn’t know this. Not until the EA from hell goes over to the printer to see why it is going nuts.)

EA: “WHOSE BRIDGE IS THIS?! ONE! THAT’S HOW MANY COPIES YOU NEED TO PRINT! JUST ONE! WHOSE IS THIS, HUH? I WANT AN ANSWER NOW!”

(I notice the student responsible as his face turns the colour of snow and I’m pretty sure I can see the sweat drops from where I stand. I discreetly slink over, hands in pockets, and without making eye contact drop a little advice.)

Me: “So for future notice, if it doesn’t print the first time, just give it a minute, all right?”

Kid: “Uh… yeah… um…” *sweats*

Me: “I would suggest slowly making your way outside now and uh… don’t make any sudden moves.”

Kid: “But my… ?”

Me: *smiles* “Unless you want to go fetch it yourself, I’d suggest leaving it to me.”

(The kid then walked out of class like he was miming a burglar from an old black and white film. I then went up to the EA, who was so pissed at this point that she was spitting all over the place, pretended I had no clue who would do such a thing, snuck one of the fifty sheets, put the kid’s name on it, and slipped it into the middle of the pile. I’m pretty sure it was this incident that made me suddenly become this kid’s hero. And I can assure you this kid never clicked that print button more than once. In fact, I think he was afraid of the printer for a while.)

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