Go Fund Me But In Real Life

, , , , | Right | February 21, 2019

(The pet salon where I work has a different monthly spa special you can add to your dog’s groom for an additional fee. This month we are partnering with a rescue to raise money for vet bills for a dog who broke his leg. We have a jar in the lobby guests can put change into if they don’t want to buy a spa, but still want to donate.)

Teenager: *comes in to pick up a dog*

Me: “Okay, your total is $59.”

(The teenager paid with $63, but when I handed him back the $3 and a $1 from the drawer, he didn’t say anything and took it, which was unusual because people tend to overpay like that to tip the groomer. I went back to get the dog, and when I came out, the guy had his entire hand in the donation jar! He pulled it out as soon as I approached, but I couldn’t see any money in his hand, so I couldn’t outright accuse him of stealing. Pretty sure he did, because he grabbed his dog and left as fast as possible.)

They’re Not Much Nicer By Seventeen, Either

, , , , | Right | February 13, 2019

(I work for a small but successful company that specialises in organizing sweet seventeens — the equivalent of sweet sixteens in the US. The owners of the company are a young married couple, and they routinely perform in the parties as magician and host. On this day I am accompanying them in a meeting with a client, who is a girl about to have her “extra special” sweet seventeen party. No, the parents are not there. They gave her a blank check to organise her own party.)

Girl: *sitting there with her arms crossed* “So, what games will we have at my party?”

Female Owner: “Well, we can have a dancing competition where—“

Girl: *cuts off my boss mid-sentence, rolling her eyes, sighing, and waving a hand* “Next!”

Male Owner: “A cake eating competition is really popular these days, and—“

Girl: *rolls her eyes and waves a hand again* “Ew! My guests? Their clothes are expensive. I’m sure you’re not paying for dry-cleaning if cake gets on them.”

(My eyes go wide at the girl’s rudeness, but my bosses have had a previous meeting with her and are familiar with her attitude. They keep quiet and continue in this manner for a while, until they start discussing having a magic show at the party.)

Girl: *looks my male boss up and down* “You’re the magician? Don’t you have someone else?”

Male Owner: “I’m the only magician we have. Don’t worry; I’ve been performing in parties since I was younger than you are.”

Girl: “You’re going to wear a suit, right? Can you fit in a suit? You’re kind of fat.”

Male Owner: *fake laugh* “I can fit in a suit. I wore one to our wedding.” *gestures to his wife*

Girl: *looks at both of them, snorts* “You married him? Why?!”

(After that, my bosses sent me out of the room because they could see my face was red from anger. I didn’t come back until the meeting was over, but I was told that the girl continued making snide comments about how my female boss made a huge mistake marrying her husband.)

Evading Tax, One Dollar At A Time

, , , , , | Right | January 28, 2019

(I’m a cashier at a dollar store. Two teenagers, who have been causing a bit of a ruckus, finally check out.)

Teen #1: *pointing to a chocolate bar* “That’s a dollar, right?”

Me: “Yes.”

Teen #1: *pointing to another chocolate bar* “And this is 50 cents, right?”

Me: “No… it’s a dollar. Your total is $3.50.”

Teen #2: “So, it’s not all a dollar! You’re cheating us!”

Me: *sighs* “There are mandatory taxes on these products.”

Teen #1: “I’m under 18. I don’t pay taxes.”

Me: *not having time for their games* “Pay or I’ll get my manager.”

(They paid without protest and left. Whose life is so sad that they have to go and bug people working in a dollar store?)

Wassup My Nina

, , , , , , | Right | January 15, 2019

(It’s 2001. I’m a Hispanic woman in her twenties. Because I have naturally blond hair, people often mistake me for a tanned white lady. I get a phone call from a customer wanting to know if we have a certain item in stock. I put her on hold and call my coworker, Nina, since she knows more about the inventory than I do. She’s a bit hard of hearing, so I have to raise the volume of my voice a little.)

Me: “Hey, Nina!”

Nina: *meekly* “Yeah?”

Me: “Do we have any [popular item] left?”

Nina: “Let me check.”

(She checks the back. While I’m waiting, two African American twin ladies who appear to be in their late teens approach.)

Me: “How can I help you, ladies?”

Teen #1: “Cut the BS, you b****! How dare you say that word?!”

Me: *confused but keeping it together* “What word? If I accidentally said something that offended you, I apologize.”

Teen #2: “Cut the s***, already! You can’t say that thing accidentally!”

Me: I have to warn you that your continued use of profanity will force security to escort you out.”

Teen #1: “You can’t force us to do anything, you d*** racist!”

Teen #2: “We demand a discount and your a** fired!”

(One of my managers overhears and intervenes.)

Manager: “I’m sure we can solve this in a civilized manner.”

(The two customers keep saying that I used racial slurs and raised my voice. I try telling my side of the story but they keep interrupting me and calling me a white b****.)

Manager: “I really doubt [My Name] would do such a thing, and she’s actually—“

Teen #1: “An entitled, white b****!”

(I’m surprised I haven’t lunged at them by now, since I’m known to have a temper. While they are still shouting, I see an elderly African American man walking toward us with a nice suit. He doesn’t seem very happy.)

Man: “What in the name of the merciful Lord is going on here?!”

Teen #2: “This gold-digging tramp used the N-word out loud!”

Man: *to me* “Is that so, young lady?”

Me: No! I was just calling for my coworker who is hard of hearing and is named Nina!

(At this point Nina exits the back room. She is clearly Korean.)

Manager: “That’s her.”

Man: “I see.” *to the teens* “I didn’t spend my youth during the Civil Rights movement so you could act like a pair of entitled brats! Now, apologize to this nice lady and kiss your birthday money goodbye. You clearly don’t deserve it. If it were up to me I would send you job options. Good Heavens, your parents spoiled you rotten!”

Me: “By the way girls, I’m Hispanic. My advice to you is to stay in school and clean your ears.”

(The girls apologized. The grandfather laughed and dragged the girls out by their ears, after he bought a nice suit for church. After Nina told me we had the item, I resumed the call from earlier.)

Total Coneheads

, , , , , , | Right | January 13, 2019

(“Coning” — grabbing the ice-cream by the cream and not the cone, while filming the drive-thru staff’s reaction– at fast food restaurants is popular and there are two ways we handle it. Some employees find it hilarious and others get annoyed because we often have to clean up the mess. Some would even refuse to give the ice cream if the customer made a move to grab it from the top.)

Customer #1: “Four vanilla ice creams.”

(I’m incredibly wary because I can see via camera they are four young teenagers.)

Me: “Okay, that’ll be $[total]. Please pull up to the first window.”

(Once they pull up and hand me the money, I can see they have a camera in the passenger’s seat. I nod at my manager, who is a friend of mine, in case there is any trouble.)

Me: “Here’s your change. And your ice cream.” *[Customer #1] goes to grab from the top and I pull away* “Just to let you know we do have the right to refuse service to anyone we feel will cause a disturbance. Now, I will give you this cone and you will take it from the BOTTOM and turn off your camera or I will call the police.”

Customer #2: “This is public property; I can film you!”

Me: “ACTUALLY, it’s private property open to the public, so we CAN ask you to stop filming, and I’m a minor and I don’t consent to getting filmed.”

(The four teens look at each other, clearly never expecting me to know this much about law.)

Me: “Now, will you take this cone from the bottom? You’ve already paid for it; might as well take it.”

(The customer reaches for the cone from the bottom and does the same for the rest while the passenger turns off the camera — after I make him show me the screen to prove he deleted the footage.)

Me: “Have a great day.”

Customer #2: “Hey, dude, let’s go to [Popular Hamburger Place across the road] and do it there.”

(I had a friend who worked the drive-thru there and texted her to watch out for those guys and reminded her of what to say. Needless to say, those guys weren’t getting any ice cream that day.)

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