Smells Like Teenage Dispirit

, , , , , , | Right | December 12, 2017

(I am a customer in a supermarket. There’s a group of five obnoxious teenagers — three girls and two boys — with a middle-aged woman at the checkout. They are being rowdy, and while staying somewhat close to the woman, they’re wandering around the aisle that connects all the checkouts, getting in people’s way, and shooting superior glares and smirks at the people they’re blocking. Most other customers aren’t even TRYING to get past the teenagers, and instead, are going all the way down an aisle and coming up another aisle that takes them closer to a checkout that’s away from the teenagers. The woman the teenagers are with isn’t scolding them, but she looks as though she’s been trying to make them behave but finally decided to stop wasting her breath. She looks very annoyed and VERY embarrassed by their behavior. I place my items on the conveyor belt, then bend down to place my hand-basket in the stack under the overhang of the conveyor belt. Someone had dropped a basket on the floor earlier on, so while I’m putting my basket away, I pick up the other basket, upright it, fold the handles down, then add it to the stack of baskets, as well. One of the teenage girls addresses me.)

Teenage Girl: “Why’d you do that?”

Me: “What do you mean?”

Teenage Girl: “Why’d you put it away? It wasn’t your basket.”

Me: “Because I did?”

Teenage Girl: “But why?”

Me: “Because it didn’t take any effort and it was the right thing to do.”

Mother: *loudly*That is how I raised you to be! I don’t know what the f*** happened!” *she waves her hands in exasperation*

Cashiers: *giggling*

(All of the teenagers suddenly looked mortified, shut up, stopped meandering into other people’s way, and stood calmly around the woman they were with.)

Weeding Them Out Early

, , , | Working | November 17, 2017

(I’m working a closing shift one night when a group of rowdy teenagers comes through the door. One of them approaches me:)

Teen: “Where’s the manager?”

Me: “That would be me.”

Teen: “We were just wondering: Do you have to pass a drug test to work here?”

Me: “What kind of drugs would we be testing for?”

Teen: “Weed!” *the whole group erupts in laughter, and the “spokesman” for the group high fives a few of them*

Me: “Actually, yes; there’s a brand-new policy stating that we do, in fact, have to test.”

Teen: *disheartened* “Dang.”

Me: “…”

Spelt Out How She Was Dealing With It

, , , , , | Related | November 4, 2017

(I’m in line when a mother and teenager join me. The teenager picks up some display biscuits.)

Daughter: “What the…? Spelt biscuits? What the heck are spelt biscuits?”

Mother: “Well, they are biscuits, made out of…”

Daughter: “I get that! Jeez! I mean, what the heck are spelt biscuits?!”

Mother: “Spelt is a kind of…”

Daughter: “I know! Gosh, Mom, gosh! Never mind, okay?!”

Mother: “Oh, I forgot something…” *leaves the line*

Daughter: “What? Mom, come back! Mom! I’m not staying here! If you won’t come back right now, I’m leaving without you! Mom! UGH! MOM!”

(By the time I was finished with the cashier, the mother still hadn’t returned and the daughter was still waiting. I really felt sorry for the girl; apparently, puberty hit her hard, and Mom knew exactly how to deal with it!)

Air Heads

, , , , , , | Friendly | October 26, 2017

(I am at the grocery store when two “stereotypical” teenage girls walk by. I catch this snippet of their conversation.)

Teenage Girl #1: “Oh, my God, like, have you ever wondered what air tastes like?”

Teenage Girl #2: “Like, I never have even thought of that. You’re, like, a total genius.”

Teenage Girl #1: “I’m, like, going to ask our science teacher this question. I bet he doesn’t know the answer, either!”

Teenage Girl #2: “Yeah, he’s going to have to totally admit you’re smart now! LOL!”

(I, too, was “laughing out loud,” but not for the same reason that they were.)

A Tale As Fold As Time

, , , , , | Working | October 25, 2017

(I am shopping with my sister and my best friend, and we pop into a popular clothing store. While my sister and friend are going through piles of clothes, I start folding them back into perfect piles. An employee is watching us from the corner, probably because teenagers either cause trouble or don’t end up buying anything. She walks by and asks how we are doing.)

Me: “We’re fine; I’m just folding clothes.”

Employee: “You know, you don’t have to do that.”

Me: “I know but I work in retail. It’s ingrained in me.”

(She was much nicer to us after that.)

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