They Were Never Going To Pay So Now You Have To

, , , , | Right | July 29, 2021

I had a group of four teenage boys come in right as the lunch rush was beginning. They were laughing and joking with each other, which made it hard to get their actual orders put in, and led to the line backing up as they took up my register. Finally, I got all of their orders in the system.

Me: “Okay, your price is [Price]. Cash or card?”

The kid who had been the spokesman for the group had turned back towards his group, and all four of them started walking away at that point.

Me: “Sir? Sir! Kid, you still need to pay!”

Nothing. All four of them just wandered off to go sit at a table.

Me: *To the kitchen* “Cancel the order.”

I cancelled it out in the system and then moved on to handle the next customer. We got through the line and everything had died down somewhat, and then one of the teens came up.

Teen: “Hey! Where’s our food?”

Me: “You never paid, so we never made it.”

Teen: “We pay afterward.”

Me: “No, you pay now or you don’t get food.”

He made a face at me and stormed back to the table. They continued to sit around, glaring up at the registers every so often, before they went over to the condiment counter and made a mess with the sauces and knocked over a stack of trays, and then they all stomped out.

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Leaving A Lasting Impression

, , , , , , | Right | CREDIT: Artsy_Trashbin | July 25, 2021

Back in my high school days, when my friends and I were sixteen to eighteen, we went to a tiny diner out of town. All of us worked in the service industry so we would tip pretty decently. I think the bill came to around $80, and I just put in a $100 in the bill book and we left.

After we got in the car and drove a few miles, my friend asked if we thought it was enough that she only tipped our waitress $15. I expressed that I’d tipped her about $20 already, after which my other friend chimed in that she’d left a twenty on the table. We laughed it off and said we probably made her day with the over 65% tip.

Three years later, we were passing through that town and we decided to stop by that same diner. Lo and behold, the waitress was there and she remembered us! She mentioned that she was lowkey confused at the amount of cash left after the tip my friend handed to her but was grateful as it helped her buy her son a birthday present. It’s just amazing how she remembered after three years.

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You Get An F In Responsible Parenting

, , , , , | Legal | July 10, 2021

Every time the schools closes, a load of teenagers like to congregate outside of our office. They are often loud, and they smoke, drink, and leave rubbish everywhere. Recently, they have started to bring in skateboards and use our carpark as a park to play in. 

After several cars were damaged, security started to chase them out time and again, but they come back, often worse. This time, “someone” has sprayed graffiti over the front of the building. The police are called and catch a few of them still hiding on the grounds.

I get there as one of the mothers arrives. Instead of being a decent parent, she is screaming at the policewoman.

Woman: “He didn’t do anything! It was the others.”

Police: “I’m sorry, but he has spray paint in his bag that matches the damage. Did you give it to him?”

Woman: “Well, yeah, but that’s for his school work. He was probably just carrying it for someone.”

I do a double-take at that particular lack of common sense, and then I recognise the kid as the one who threw things at my car the other day while swearing at me. This is my chance to set him straight.

Me: “Oh, excuse me, officer, but if you look around the back, I saw this one smoking something that I’m guessing is illegal. I imagine you can trace the spit back to his DNA or something.”

Police: “Thank you, sir. Whereabouts?”

As I explained, the mother started to scream obscenities at me, eventually having to be restrained and arrested herself. The kid, on the other hand, seemed to accept his fate.

I ended up working for the company for many years. Shortly after I left, I heard that that same kid got a job there working as one of the security guards he used to try so hard to evade.

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Certifiably, Positively Unintelligent

, , , , , | Right | CREDIT: McFlubberpants | June 29, 2021

I work at a computer store at the returns desk. It often functions as a customer service desk, but technically there is no customer service desk as the members of staff are expected to be able to help with every aspect of their respective department; everyone’s customer service. I HATE working the returns desk, but I am allowed to be very flexible with our return policy within reason.

An hour before my shift ends, a teenager comes up to my desk hoping to return some computer parts, including RAM, a motherboard, and a CPU. He doesn’t have the receipts; however, receipts are not required as long as I can find the transactions in my Point Of Sales system. Thankfully, he has an account, and I am able to find the RAM and motherboard. I am able to give him a refund on the RAM with no issue. However, the motherboard is about fifty days old. Our return policy is thirty days, but I am feeling nice. He’s a kid, after all, and I remember how confusing I found the world when I was his age.

Me: “I can’t give you your money back, but you can exchange the motherboard for a new one or get a gift card.”

Teen: “Well, I can’t have a gift card. My dad will get mad.”

Me: “Okay, but I can’t give your money back. You are well over the return period, so it’s either a gift card or an exchange.”

Teen: “I guess I’ll get a new motherboard, then.”

Me: “Which one do you want?”

Teen: “The same one, I guess.”

At this point, I realize that I have forgotten why he wanted to return it. It isn’t required anymore, as any open product returned is sent back to the distributor for inspection, anyway. Turns out his computer wasn’t working after he put it all together, so he needs new stuff.

Teen: “Yeah, I don’t know why it’s not working.”

Me: “Okay, did you want to go look around for other stuff, or did you want me to call a salesman over to grab you another motherboard?”

Teen: “Just give me a new one. Now, are you going to refund me for the CPU?”

I haven’t gotten to the CPU yet, as I am still pretty new to returns and I am doing them one at a time to make sure I don’t mess up. Of course, I have to be careful about returns, making sure the item is the correct one and all that, but I have to be EXTRA careful with CPU returns. So, I open up the package to do my checks and I instantly realize why this customer’s computer isn’t working.

For those not in the know, the CPU is a small square chip that essentially acts as a computer’s brain. It’s a super important and extremely fragile piece of equipment. Depending on the brand of CPU, there may or may not be pins on the bottom that are essential for the functionality of both the CPU and the rest of the computer. They are extremely easy to bend and break. However, it’s also extremely easy to NOT bend or break them, so there really isn’t a good reason for someone to damage a CPU. This kid’s CPU looks like he took a hammer to it.

Me: “Well, this is why your computer isn’t working.”

Teen: “What?”

Me: “The pins are smashed. Nothing in the computer can work with damage like this.”

Teen: “Oh. Well, can I return it?”

I don’t want to say anything yet because I feel bad for the kid, but we are unlikely to take it back due to the damage and because he clearly bought it over thirty days ago as I have yet to find the receipt for the CPU. It is a pretty expensive CPU, so I am hoping that management will make an exception and let him exchange it.

Me: “I’m not finding the CPU under your account. Is there another name it could be under?”

Teen: “We could try my dad’s; his name is [Dad].”

I look up his name and no account shows up.

Me: “Uh, there’s no account under your father’s name.”

Teen: “Oh, he doesn’t have an account. I’m the only one who shops here.”

I realize that I’m dealing with a teenager who is slightly stupider than your average teenager. However, I keep my composure and keep moving forward. In a last-ditch effort, I check the transactions based on the CPU’s serial number. We have to manually attach transactions to accounts, and sometimes the cashiers neglect to do that for any number of reasons.

However, when I scan the serial number, nothing pops up. That is weird.

Me: “Did you buy this at this location or a different location?”

Teen: “Different location.”

I admit I should have asked that sooner so I could’ve pulled up the remote search window from the get-go. However, when I pull it up, it shows that he has never made any purchase at any of our other locations. He has only ever shopped at my store’s location.

Me: “Which [Computer Store] location did you buy this from?”

Teen: “Oh, I didn’t buy this from [Computer Store]. I bought this from [Massive Online Retailer].”

I just look at him silently. I don’t know how I got to this point. Why did he think we would take his CPU that he bought from [Retailer]?

Me: “Why are you trying to get a refund for a product you didn’t even buy from here?”

Teen: “What do you mean?”

Me: “You didn’t give us the money for this. You gave it to [Retailer]. Therefore, we don’t have money to give back to you. That’s at [Retailer].”

Teen: “So? I want my money back.”

Me: “Your money isn’t here. Your money is at [Retailer]. If you want your money, you need go to [Retailer].”

Teen: “So, you can’t take care of it?”

Me: “No. You did not give us money for that CPU. That CPU has no monetary value here that I can give back to you.”

Teen: “Can I exchange it?”

Me: “I’m afraid not. We don’t do trade-ins.”

Teen: “No, I want to exchange it.”

Internally, I’m banging my head against a wall. How could a teenager not understand the concept that a return can only go back to where he originally bought it from?

Me: “In order to do an exchange, you would’ve needed to buy this product here or at one of our other locations, but you didn’t. You bought it at [Retailer]. There is nothing more I can do for you. You need to send this back to [Retailer].”

Teen: “So you’re not going to help me?”

Me: “No.”

He leaves, and I am relieved that he eventually understood. Or so I thought, because not even a minute later, he comes back with my manager.

Teen: “He wouldn’t let me return this and was mean to me! I want a refund!”

Manager: “I’m sorry about that, sir. Do you have your receipt?”

Teen: “No, but I bought last month from [Retailer].”

Manager: “Why would I give you money for something that you didn’t even buy from us?”

Teen: “Are you saying you won’t give me a refund?”

Manager: “There is no refund to give, and there’s nothing I can do for you.”

The teen then storms off to a salesman.

Teen: “They were mean to me, called me names, and won’t give me a refund for my item!”

Salesman: “That’s not my department. It’s their decision when it comes to refunds.”

The teen then storms off and tries this routine over and over again, each time getting more and more upset over the next twenty minutes, until he is quite literally ugly crying to the store’s general manager about how horrible everyone was to him and how we won’t give him a refund for his CPU. The general manager then asks him to wait and comes to me.

General Manager: “Why won’t you give him a refund for his CPU? At this point, I don’t really care how old it is.”

Me: “He didn’t buy from here. He bought from [Retailer]. Ask him.”

The general manager did just that. Eventually, the teen left, tears in his eyes and without a refund. He later left me a survey review saying that I made fun of him, threw his items on the floor, and refused to give him a refund. We have cameras. My general manager had that review dismissed.

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Loyalty, Thy Name Is Dog

, , , , , , , | Legal | June 16, 2021

Police came and pulled a student out of my class, much to the interest of his classmates. He was informed that he was needed at his home immediately but was given no other information. The cops loaded the boy into the back of the cruiser, while his classmates looked on, and they went to the boy’s house.

When they arrived, this was the scene that greeted him. A group of cops was standing at the gate to the backyard, one with his sidearm drawn and pointing into the backyard. The boy was brought forward and he saw two men sitting in the tree in the backyard with his dog at the base watching them and growling softly.

Apparently, one of the men, actually a teenager, had hopped the fence and broken into the house and then proceeded to help himself to whatever took his fancy. As the burglar started to exit the house, a big white dog came charging out, barking at full volume, charging the teen into the backyard and up the tree. The dog had managed to close his jaws on the rear pocket of the teen’s jeans and turn out the entire panel; his wallet was located in this panel.

The dog heard the cops approaching as they responded to a neighbor reporting the break-in and had slunk back into his ambush spot. The cops saw the teen in the tree and one jumped the fence to arrest him. Out came the dog again, barking at full volume. The officer ended up in the same tree as the teen.

The other officers were trying to decide what to do when, as it’s a small town, one was sent to collect the boy from school. The officer with the drawn sidearm was getting set to “end the situation” when the boy appeared. The boy was asked to control the situation, which he did. He walked into the backyard and called the dog to his side. The dog looked over his shoulder, wagged his tail at seeing his owner, and turned back to continue growling at the men in the tree, all the while scooting backward toward the boy.

When the dog reached the boy, he was sent into the garage where the boy closed the door behind him. He turned to the cops and asked, “What’s the problem?”

The teen was arrested and hauled off and the cops, impressed with the display, actually offered to buy the dog. It seems the dog would let you enter but wouldn’t let you leave.

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