Not The Same Man Coming Out

, , , , , | Right | April 4, 2020

I am working in a sandwich shop. We have no problem letting people use the bathroom. 

One time, a man enters the restaurant. He has a large and thick beard on his face that makes us assume he is homeless. He goes directly to our bathroom. I am busy serving another customer so I don’t see him clearly when he gets out of the bathroom, but something is off.

His beard has disappeared!

He shaved his face and there is now hair all over the sink and on the floor.

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Not What Is Meant By Giving A Voice To Minorities

, , , , , | Right | April 3, 2020

(I am a white male working at a well-known fast food franchise in a predominately-black area. I am working the drive-thru order and payment window. A car pulls up to the speaker box and I talk into my headset.)

Me: “Welcome to [Store]. Can I take your order?”

Customer: “I’ll take a [order].”

Me: “That will be [price]. First window, please.”

(So far, it seems like a standard order. The customer drives around. The customer is a black woman. Before I can even repeat the price, she looks up with a shocked expression.)

Customer: “YOU’RE NOT BLACK!”

(I am speechless.)

Customer: “You sound black on the box! WHY DO YOU SOUND BLACK?!”

(I do not know what else to say except:)

Me: “That will be [price].”

(The customer pays and then drives off to pick up her food. Then, she starts talking to herself.)

Customer: “Shouldn’t be making himself sound black like that. He’s not black.”

(My coworkers at the food window told me later that she told them to tell me to stop pretending to be black.)

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Thy Cup Runneth Over With Laziness

, , , | Right | April 2, 2020

(I’m working in the window of the drive thru.)

Me: “Here’s your coffee and change, sir. Have a nice day!” 

Customer: “Thanks! Hey, can you throw this cup away? I forgot to do it at the garbage cans back there.” 

Me: “Sorry, we’re not allowed to take garbage through the window for health and safety reasons.” 

Customer: “Darn! Oh, well, thanks again.”

(The customer drives off. Ten minutes later, a customer drives past the speaker without ordering, and I don’t think anything of it until I see the same customer driving past the window.)

Customer: “Hey! Sorry! Just wanted to throw my cup away!” 

(Instead of using one of the trash cans conveniently located in front of the store, he decided instead to wait ten minutes in the drive-thru lane just to throw away his cup.)

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A Support Shirt Results In A Show Of Support

, , , , , | Right | April 1, 2020

(I’m a male and I work in the electronics section of a bulk store. I am helping in the clothing section one night. I wear tank-top-style compression undershirts because they’re moisture-wicking and where we live regularly reaches 120+ degrees Fahrenheit and even after 10:00 pm can still be over 115 degrees.

I move and the strap over my shoulder cuts into my cut arm a bit, so I reach through my sleeve to readjust it when a lady, I’m guessing between 35 and 45 years old, walks up and puts her hand on my shoulder.)

Customer: “I just wanted you to know that until I saw you adjust your bra strap I never would’ve guessed you were trans. You look very convincing as a man!”

(She walked away. I relayed the message to my coworkers and we all had a laugh, trying to figure out how she thought I was a biological female.

I’m glad she was trying to be supportive but for the next several weeks I am questioning if I somehow redeveloped the feminine physique I had in high school and lost when I put on 45 pounds within two months of graduating.)

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You Could Keep Going West But That’s The Long Way Round

, , , , | Right | March 31, 2020

(I am hosting at the end of the night on a Saturday, about thirty minutes before we close, when this customer walks in. He looks a little worse for wear and very confused.)

Me: “Evening, sir, how can I help you?”

Customer: “Uh… can I use the restroom?”

(Normally, our policy is to only allow paying customers to use the restrooms, but since it’s late and he doesn’t appear to mean any harm, I allow it. He returns a few minutes later.)

Customer: “You might be able to help me with this. I’m on a trip.”

Me: “That’s great, sir. How can I help?”

Customer: “Which way is Florida?”

Me: *confused pause* “Florida?”

Customer: “Yes, I’m a little lost. Which way is it?”

Me: “Well, if you get on the interstate heading east, I suppose you’ll get there eventually.”

Customer: “Go west?”

Me: “East.”

Customer: “Ah, thanks.” *mutters* “Must’ve been going the wrong way…”

(The customer left. A few of my coworkers came over to see if I was okay after he left, because I had dropped down under the host stand to hide how I was crying with laughter. We’re located in Louisiana. How far in the wrong direction did he go?)

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