They Need To Be Set Straight

, , , , | Working | February 16, 2018

(I’m a customer, wandering around the mall with my husband to kill time while my phone is being repaired. I pass a kiosk that is selling hair-straightening devices. A worker spots me.)

Worker #1: “Hi! We’ve got a great deal today!”

Me: “No, thanks.” *keeps walking*

Worker #1: “Imagine no-damage, straight, shiny hair!”

Me: *over my shoulder* “No, thanks.”

(Later, I’m heading back to pick up my phone and I pass the same kiosk. The worker now has a coworker with them.)

Worker #2: “Hey! We can get rid of those curls for you!”

Me: “No, thanks!”

Worker #2: “No one wants curls!”

Me: “No!”

([Worker #2] then RUNS up behind me and tries to grab my hair. My husband blocks her, and I scream:)

Me: “DO NOT TOUCH ME! GET AWAY FROM ME!”

Worker #2: “Geez! No need to be so rude! I’m just trying to help you get rid of those ugly curls!”

Husband: “Who is going to help you get rid of your ugly personality?”

They “Fired” Themselves

, , , , | Working | February 14, 2018

(Not long before this story, I took over as store manager. A kiosk opens up in the mall directly outside of my department store. The salespeople are rude and loud, and they aggressively harass customers passing by. They escalate to actually coming into my store to try to sell to customers shopping inside. After several emails to the mall management about this issue go unanswered, I go speak to them myself.)

Me: “I have a written report of every incident. I’m not going to put up with this any longer.”

Mall Management: “Quit pretending this is a big deal. They are only there for six months. Work it out between you and them.”

Me: “This is your responsibility, not mine, to fix.”

Mall Management: “No, and frankly, I don’t want you coming back here to whine unless they set your store on fire!”

(I forward a complaint to my higher-ups, and instruct staff to alert us when there is an issue. I find out that one of the kiosk workers has been using the men’s room downstairs, but I am not allowed to bar them from doing so. The whole time, they are still harassing my customers from the kiosk, yelling into the store. Then, a few weeks later, a smoke alarm goes off. An employee responds to find a small fire, which he puts out with an extinguisher, but the fire department still has to respond. A half-hour later, I walk into the mall management office.)

Me: “I need to complain about the kiosk employees.”

Mall Management: “I told you not to bother me unless–“

(His eyes go wide. A fireman is walking in behind me.)

Me: “Right, and it turns out one of the employees was smoking in our bathroom, set off the smoke detector, panicked, and threw the cigarette into the waste paper basket, catching it on fire. Now, can we discuss how you are going to solve this and the costs incurred?”

(The kiosk’s lease was terminated.)

The Gift Card That Keeps On Giving, Part 7

, , , , | Right | February 14, 2018

(I am cashiering at my store, where we have a rewards program for cardholders.)

Me: “Hi there. Find everything all right today?”

Customer: “Yes, thank you!”

(As I scan the first item, she looks confused.)

Customer: “That shirt was supposed to be 50% off.”

(When we scan items into the computer, it will automatically take off any discounts that we are currently offering, and the item is showing up as full price.)

Me: “Okay, let me just go to where it’s hanging and take a look at the signage to confirm that.”

(I realize the sign we have is a little misleading, so I decide to give her 50% off, anyway, and scan the next item, which also appears at full price.)

Customer: “That one is 60% off.”

(My manager is watching and goes to check the sign.)

Me: “Sorry, looks like that one is just going to be full price today.”

Customer: “But the sign says it’s 60% off.”

Manager: “I’m sure the 60% off sign is for the shirts that are hanging directly underneath it, and not the one you have here, which was hanging several feet away.”

Customer: “Oh, okay, I guess. Also, can I use my rewards?”

Me: *glad she’s not making a fuss about the discount* “Sure! Just let me scan in the coupon for you.”

(When I scan it in, an error message pops up and tells me that the rewards code has already been used in a previous online order.)

Me: “Sorry, the computer is telling me you actually already used this reward.”

Customer: “But I didn’t use it. I didn’t buy anything with it.”

Me: “Well, the computer shows that it was used with an online order. Does that ring a bell?”

Customer: “No! I didn’t use it! I never made any online order!”

Manager: *annoyed at this point* “If you want to use the reward, you’re going to have to call our customer service line and dispute with them that you never used the code. There’s no way for us to just take the rewards money off of your purchase because you said you didn’t use it. Our computer tells us that the code was used.”

Customer: *also highly annoyed with us* “Fine. I’ll call them.” *pays for items and leaves, complaining to her friends that she never used the code*

Me: *to manager* “Yeah, the computer was definitely lying to me, and she was telling the truth. Not like she could have possibly forgotten she used the code.”

Related:
The Gift Card That Keeps On Giving, Part 6
The Gift Card That Keeps On Giving, Part 5
The Gift Card That Keeps On Giving, Part 4

Seven Years Bad Shopping Luck

, , , , , , | Working | January 30, 2018

(My mom and teenage sister are shopping at the mall. On the way out of a high-end store, the security alarm goes off and a loss prevention officer stops them. He makes them both walk through, one at a time, and my sister sets the alarm off.)

Mom: *looking at my sister with disappointment* “[Sister], you didn’t!”

Sister: “I didn’t take anything; I swear!”

(The officer makes her empty all of her pockets, which are, of course, empty, because she really didn’t take anything. He then has a sudden hunch, asks her to take her coat off, and then throws the coat through the sensors. The alarm goes off.)

Officer: “The good news is that I believe you. The bad news is that whoever sold you this coat is an idiot, because they never turned off the anti-theft device.”

(He was right. Apparently, they never turned off the device, and it took seven years of wearing that coat before anyone even noticed. Fortunately, the store was able to deactivate it for her so it didn’t happen again.)

His Comments Elevated Him To True Jerk Status

, , , , , , , | Right | January 26, 2018

After I got out of the military I took a temporary job working security at an outdoor mall.

I was actually required to wear a locator so the powers that be could see if I was walking around enough on my 12-hour shift.

My feet were horribly blistered from so much walking. So, I went to take an elevator to the second floor. This actually was part of my job, to look for vandalism.

When I pressed the button, I heard someone make a remark that I could tell was a snide one.

“I’m sorry, can I help you?” I asked.

“Nothing,” he responded, then said, “Lazy rent-a-cop.”

I responded, “Well, I’ve been walking for ten hours, on a twelve hour shift. My feet are blistered, and my knee is screaming. I’m a disabled veteran, so is it really a problem if I take an elevator?”

That shut him up. For the record, I am a disabled vet, though my knee injury was an operational one, not a combat one.

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