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Gun Controlling The Situation, Part 3

, , , , , | Right | May 2, 2022

I was working at a burger place around 1984 in the drive-thru. The weather was dry and not too cold. It was after 10:00 pm, so the dining room was closed. A bus arrived.

Normally, a bus coming is good news. It keeps us busy for a while, making the time pass quicker. In this case, with the closed dining room, it was different. The manager was troubled, but she couldn’t reopen the dining room. The bus wouldn’t fit in our drive-thru, so the people got out, lined up, and walked through. The manager helped them with their orders, and I did my normal thing of collecting payment and handing out food.

Then, the guy with the gun came. He wasn’t going to wait for forty or so people to get through the line, so he drove in past them. While his food was being made and I did my thing, none of us being paid enough to deal with the gun, the manager called the state police, who had a barracks across the street.

They nailed him as he left. Turned out it was a BB gun, but still.

Related:
Gun Controlling The Situation, Part 2
Gun Controlling The Situation

Baby-Back

, , , , , , , , | Right | April 28, 2022

I am checking out at an outdoor retailer, and I hand over my dividend card to get credit for the purchase.

Cashier: “Huh, [My Last Name]. I’ve only ever seen that name once. That was my fourth-grade teacher, but she left to have a baby.”

Me: “Oh, yeah? Did you grow up in [Town]?”

Cashier: “Yeah, how’d you know?”

Me: *Waves* “Hi, I’m the baby!”

Got To The Meat Of The Issue

, , , , | Right | April 22, 2022

I’ve had a particularly bad day at work. With five hours still left to go, I decide to treat myself and use a delivery app to order some food from a popular chain. I order two $1 cheeseburgers and select “no mustard” and “no ketchup” since I feel they use too much, and I have some packets if I end up wanting it.

I place my order and wait impatiently. It takes a while since it’s busy hours for the app, but about forty-five minutes later, I finally get my food. I take a seat and take out my first burger and something feels… off. It feels really light.

I unwrap it and find… no burger, just buns with mustard, onions, and pickles. Angry, I throw it back in the bag and open the app, prepared to go full “Can I talk to your manager?” on whoever made such an idiotic mistake. As I’m combing through the app looking for the “Help” button, I realize who, exactly, made the idiotic mistake.

It was me.

When trying to hit “no mustard” after “no ketchup,” it turns out I hit the “NO MEAT” option just below it and didn’t notice. I call the restaurant, unsure whether to laugh or cry, and ask if there is anything that can be done. I can hear the lady trying not to laugh as she says that since there was no mistake on their part and the food was made how I ordered it, there is nothing they can do.

At least I have my fries.

With This Customer, There’s Something Else That Should Stay Zipped

, , , , , | Right | April 21, 2022

My husband and I are at the grocery store and get into the checkout line after picking out our items. There are two customers in front of us: one with a bigger order that the bagger has almost finished putting into the customer’s reusable bags, and then another who only has a few items. The bagger finishes with the first customer’s order and is handing off the cart to her when the customer, an elderly lady who had been chatting with her friend, lashes out.

Customer: “What?! You have to zip every bag! I don’t care if it’s not refrigerated; every bag has to be zipped! Don’t you know anything?!

By the time she finishes yelling and harrumphs off with her cart and friend, the customer between us and her has been checked out, and the cashier has moved on to our order, pushing our reusable bags down the counter to the bagger. I move up toward the credit card machine and look at the bagger, who is clearly still shaking off the encounter with Ms. Must-Be-Zipped.

Me: *To the bagger* “Don’t worry; our bags don’t have zippers on them.”

We were all masked, but I could tell she smiled under the mask, and I heard laughs from at least three cashiers around us! I made sure (as always) to thank the cashier and the bagger each personally for their help.

That Poor Child

, , , , , , | Right | April 20, 2022

I worked as a manager in a busy Boston shopping and tourist spot in the mid-1990s. The shop was three floors: two above ground, open to the public, and a floor below ground for employees accessible through two locked doors and a narrow spiral staircase. Outside of the door on the top level were public restrooms.

It was a very busy summer afternoon with at least 100 people in the store. A little boy standing in line with his family told his dad he had to pee. Dad ignored him. The boy told him several times, and still, Dad didn’t react. He got to the register where I was helping to expedite the checkout process.

Dad: “Do you have a bathroom?”

Me: “There is a public restroom in the hallway upstairs, just outside of the store exit.”

Dad: “No. He needs your bathroom. He can’t wait.”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but our employee bathrooms are not accessible on this floor, and for safety reasons, I cannot bring you below. The public restrooms are just upstairs, though.”

Dad: “Are you telling me you are ignoring the needs of a little boy due to ‘safety’?”

He did finger quotes as he said this.

Me: “Yes, sir, that’s exactly what I’m saying.”

It went on for a few more seconds until the dad grabbed the kid who desperately needed to pee at this point and left to use the restroom. I checked out the rest of his family, who were embarrassed by the confrontation, and I was in the middle of checking out the next person in line when Dad came back into the store, dragging his child, who was crying and in wet pants. The father started screaming at me.

Dad: “He pissed himself! Are you happy, you dumb b****? This is all your fault! He pissed himself like a f****** baby!”

At this point, the customer who I was checking out spoke up.

Customer: “Are you joking? Your child told you he had to pee while we were still standing back there—” *gestures to where the line is stretched back at least ten people away* “—and you did nothing. You tried to bully this poor woman into breaking rules instead of just saying thank you and taking your kid to the bathroom. And now you’re humiliating him at the same time as trying to blame her? Your bathroom emergency was not her fault!”

It was a great moment made better when the dad started arguing with the customer. He started threatening violence, so one of my employees grabbed an officer patrolling outside to intervene. The officer told the angry dad:

Officer: “Your lack of planning does not constitute an emergency for anyone else.”