Ensuring That They Can’t Be Insured

, , , | Right | June 21, 2017

(I work in an eye doctor’s office, selling eyeglasses. This happens entirely too often.)

Customer: “Do you take my insurance?”

Me: ” Well, what’s your insurance?”

Customer:” I don’t know…”

Me: “Well, do you have your card on you?”

Customer: ” No, why would I need that?”

Burn Your Return

, , , , , | Right | June 18, 2017

Customer: “I would like to return these pants.”

Me: “Okay, do you have your receipt?”

Customer: “Yes, I do.” *hands the receipt to me* “I’m returning them because the girl blew her nose and picked up a receipt off the floor and didn’t wash her hands. I think they are contaminated.  They are dirty now. You need to train your employees to be sanitary.”

Me: “Aren’t you the woman who used to come in the dry cleaners I used to work at and always complain and try to get a free order? Then I went to working at [Local Drug Store] and you had issues there, too. Let me tell you something. We are sales associates who try to do our jobs and make other people happy. But you are one customer who I know well, and nothing satisfies you.”

Customer: “I want to see a manager.”

(Manager comes up to the register.)

Manager: “How may I help you?”

Customer: “This employee is back-talking me.”

Manager: *holding up the pants* “What is your reason for returning this now? Let me tell you something, miss. Every week, you are in here returning something, sometimes more than once a week.”

Customer: “Well, your sales associates are disrespectful and this item was touched by someone who didn’t wash their hands after they rang me up and they blew their nose. They also picked up a slip off the floor. I can’t shop in a store so dirty.”

Manager: “I can return the pants, but honestly, I don’t like to lose customers. In your case, however, your returns are far outweighing your purchases and we feel you are abusing our return policy. This is the last return we are processing for you. I am asking you to not come back in this store, as you’ve had a history of harassing associates.”

(The customer took the completed return and left, clearly in shock. That’s the last time I saw the Watertown Retail Bully ever around my area.)

Driving Home The Point

, , , , | Working | June 6, 2017

(I, my aunt, and a family friend all carpool out to eat at a restaurant that usually provides good service and great food. Our friend orders a glass of wine.)

Waitress: “Here’s your wine. You’re not driving tonight, are you?”

Friend: “Oh, no, we all came in one car and I’m not the driver. No worries, dear!”

Waitress: “Okay.”

(We figure that’s the end of it, but then we get our meals.)

Friend: “That glass of wine was so good! Could I get another one, please?”

Waitress: “Oooookay, but that’s your last one for the night, okay?”

(Our friend looks upset, so at this point I decide to step in.)

Me: “[Waitress], I really appreciate what you’re doing here; drunk driving is a serious issue. However, as we’ve already told you, she is not the driver tonight, so please just get her what she asks.”

Waitress: “Hey. You drink, you drive, you lose!”

Me: “She’s not driving! Listen to us! We all came in one car and it’s her–” *point to my aunt* “–that’s driving us all home. No one at this table is getting behind any wheel after drinking alcohol, okay?”

(The waitress wordlessly walked away, but our friend still looked a little embarrassed. We reassured her that she was fine and decided not to push the issue with a manager. After we paid and left, I glanced behind us as we were getting in the car and saw the same waitress watching us all get in to make sure our friend wasn’t driving! I just shook my head and decided not to upset our friend any more by telling her.)

Unfiltered Story #87836

, , | Unfiltered | May 31, 2017

I work in a large retail chain in the electronics department. All the new release movies (DVD and Blu-Ray) are stocked on the front endcaps in the middle of the entertainment section, so that they’re blatantly visible upon entering the department. While older movies are scattered around by genre or price and can be tough to find, the new releases are literally right in front of the department and clearly marked on the shelf as such

I’m at the kiosk and the phone rings, it’s a customer asking a question about a tablet trade in, which we don’t handle (that’s done through another department). While I’m explaining this, an older woman already with a scowl on her face walks up. I give her the universal 1 minute finger, mute the phone, and tell her I’ll be with her in a second.

The gentleman on the phone then proceeds to ask several questions about newer tablets, including if other stores in the chain have them in stock, etc. It’s becoming a rather long phone call, but since this is info I do have, and he called first, I’m not simply going to hang up on him.

The woman walks back over at me and glares. “That’s longer than a second!”

I mute the phone, apologize, explain I wasn’t expecting this to be a long phone call and I’ll be with her in just one moment.

As I stand up, I see another customer at the kiosk and begin reaching for my radio to call for backup as I still cant get off the phone.

Woman glares harder. “Are you alone over here?!? Is there someone else who can help me, I’ve been waiting!”

Now already HOLDING the radio, I tell her “give me just a moment” (she glares again) as I call for assistance.

Another employee comes over, who she IGNORES OUTRIGHT to continue to stare daggers at me. My coworker then helps another customer. I finally get off the phone.

Me: “Sorry, I apologize for that, how can I help you?”

Customer: “I’m looking for (newly released movie)” Glare.

Me: On DVD or Blu-Ray?”

Customer muttering “Not Blu-Ray!”

I’m not sure I heard her correctly,so I doublecheck “So you want the DVD then?

“Yes!”

I walk about 10 steps past where she’s been staring daggers at me, get the disc off the very top front of the shelf, turn around and hand it to her with a smile.

“Here you go, have a nice day.”

She looked set to explode.

Had she just looked around for five seconds instead of fuming at me for helping the person who called before she even entered the building, she’d have been out 10 minutes ago.

In Massachusetts It’s Pronounced Any Way They Want

, , , | Right | May 29, 2017

Customer: “Hello, I’ll take a medium decaf ‘cup of chino.’”

Me: “Medium decaf cappuccino?”

Customer: “Yes, ‘cup of chino.’” *I turn around to make her drink* “Where are you from?”

Me: “I’m from Cape Cod. How about you?”

Customer: “Oh, I thought you were foreign. It’s pronounced ‘cup of chino,’ honey, not ‘cappuccino.’”