Unfiltered Story #149681

, , , | Unfiltered | May 11, 2019

(We get these calls from U.S. Citizens, on the regular)

Me: Good morning [Government office], this is [Name], how can I help you?

Caller: Yeah, uh.. I’m going to be traveling there in the next few months, I was wondering if you could help me..?

(Because we get MANY of these calls, I already know the questions, but I still play along)

Me: Well hopefully I have the answers to your questions, what do you need help with?

Caller:  I live in [U.S. state] and I was wonderin’ if I need my passport to get into Hawaii.

Me: Well, you DO need a passport of some sort of identification to get through TSA but to get INTO Hawaii, you won’t.

Caller: But… I mean, don’t you check passports to get into Hawaii?

Me:  Even though we’re out in the middle of the ocean, Hawaii is part of the United States…. you don’t need a passport.

Caller: ….Are you sure?

Me: I’m pretty positive.  We ARE the U.S.

Caller: …Oh… ok… well, what about my [significant other]?

Me: Are they a U.S. citizen?

Caller: No they came up from [any foreign country] and cleared in from [U.S. airport], will they need their passport to get into Hawaii?

Me:  They’ve already been checked and cleared at another U.S. port, again… Hawaii is still the U.S., they don’t need a passport, they are already here, right?

Caller: Well, no… we’re in [U.S. state], we’re not in Hawaii yet…

(At this point, I repeat Hawaii is part of the U.S., tell them to have a good day and hang up)

Unfiltered Story #149671

, , , | Unfiltered | May 10, 2019

Currently I’m a Retired Hotel Manager..
Back in the 1990s, while managing a Hotel in Waikiki, I was paged to meet a guest at the front desk regarding a complaint regarding our F&B Director. As I had greeted the guest at the front desk, and escorted her to talk in private at my office she shared her complaint stating: ” I don’t know how to tell you this, but your F&B Director has an very foul breath odor which reflects badly on your hotel and you need to tell him to do something about his foul breath.”  I had apologized to the guest, thanked her for her concerns regarding our F&B Director and offered her a complimentary dinner at one of our restaurants. I did have a meeting with our F&B Director regarding correcting his personal hygiene. Our F&B Director is always the well best dresser in nice looking suit & tie, but without good personal hygiene, it is a big embarrassment to our hotel brand.
Arsenio

Your Strong Opinion Is Not Strong Enough

, , , , , , | Healthy | May 1, 2019

(My one-and-a-half-year-old needs a TB test — for the curious, it turns out negative. She’s always been very strong, and I know it’s going to be tricky to get her to hold still for the jab, so I offer to help the technician.)

Me: “She’s pretty strong; would you like me to help hold her?”

Tech: *eyes rolling and voice dripping with sarcasm* “I’m just sure she is. Every parent says that.”

Me: *stepping back* “Okay, have fun.”

(For the next few minutes, the tech finds himself unable to do the quick little jab because my daughter is able to fight him off. Finally, he admits defeat.)

Tech: “Could you hold her, please?”

Me: *sickly sweet* “I’d be happy to.”

(I wrapped my arms and legs around her tightly, and it was still a struggle, but the tech administered the test. If he’d just humored me instead of being condescending, it would have been much easier for him!)

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Won’t Have To Fight Him Tooth And Nail Over It

, , , , , | Right | January 15, 2019

(I work at a hardware store in the paint department. One day this customer comes up to me with a cart full of different caulking and a piece of molding.)

Customer: “How can I attach this to above my garage? Which is the best to use?”

Me: “Well, you can use [construction adhesive] to provide a better hold?”

Customer: “Will it stay there forever if I use that product?”

Me: “Well, uh, no? But it will last a long time if you’ve used it in con–“

Customer: “I don’t want it if it won’t!”

Me: “Have you considered using a nail? Then just going over the gaps with a—“

Customer: “Like [Construction Adhesive Brand]?”

Me: “No, like an actual nail that you use a hammer for.”

Customer: “Oh, that’s perfect! Forgot actual nails existed!”

(He walked away toward nails with the molding, and left twenty bottles of caulking in a cart for me to deal with. Not cool, man, not cool.)

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Unfiltered Story #110697

, , | Unfiltered | May 14, 2018

So while working I had what we called a floor phone where we answered customer questions on products.  This also happened in 2005.

Me:  Hello this is <store>, <name> speaking.  How may i help you?

Customer:  Hello I just a wireless router from your store and now it is not working.

Me: Okay what the brand of your router.

Customer : XYZ brand.

Me: Does the computer you have have a wireless card?

Customer : Yes it ZYX laptop and it built in.

Me: Okay can explain to me what you have done?

Customer: Yes I took the router of the box and put it on the table and won’t work.

Me: Ma’am did you plug it in at all and set it up?

Customer: Not it is wireless so I shouldn’t have to plug it in at all.  Why doesn’t it work out of the box.

Me: Ma’am I recommend you come in take advantage of having a tech come out to your place to set it up for you.

Phone hangs up there.