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Probably Should’ve Seen That Coming

, , , , , | Healthy Working | May 18, 2022

I work in an optometrist’s office.

Customer: “Hi. You do glasses repairs, right? The wire snapped. Can you repair it now?”

She takes off her glasses and hands them to me. She has half-frames that use something like a fishing wire to hold the lens inside the frame, and one side has snapped. Hot glue is holding the lens to the frame, but it’s clearly just a temporary fix.

Me: “Oh, yeah, this just needs a new wire fed through. It’s a fifteen-minute job.”

Customer: “Great.”

She then sits at one of the seats, apparently content in waiting

Me: “Uh. Ma’am, you can leave and come back? If you like, you can give me your phone number and I’ll call you when I’m done.”

Customer: “You have my glasses.”

Me: “Yep, I’m just fixing them now. But you don’t need to wait.”

Customer: “I can’t even see the doorway.”

Me: “Oh!”

It actually took twenty-five minutes. The customer waited patiently, paid properly, and then left through the door without any problems.

Isn’t This The Plot To An Adult Film Or Something?

, , , , , , | Right Working | May 18, 2022

Decades ago, I used to drive for a number of local pizzerias in town. One was family-owned and they had their twelve-year-old daughter answer phones and take orders. Unfortunately, she had a habit of transposing numbers and getting addresses wrong.

One night, I had a late delivery to an older part of town that often had older houses converted into a number of apartments for rent. When I arrived, the lights were out on this old house, but I opened the door and started searching for apartment four. As it was dark and there only seemed to be three doors on the main floor, I went upstairs and saw a room with a light on at the end of the hallway. I knocked on the door.

It swung open to reveal this HUGE biker-type guy in the middle of making love to a woman! They slowly turned toward me in the doorway, and all I could think to do was ask:

Me: “Did you order a pizza?”

It was when he grabbed the huge hunting knife on his nightstand that I figured the answer was “No.”

It turned out that the owners’ daughter had transposed the address numbers again and I had accidentally “broken into” someone’s home!

The Great Resignation, Part 2

, , , , | Working | May 17, 2022

I was working as a fast-food cashier at my first real job. Usually, whenever I ran low on change the manager would tell me to “make it work” and “round up or down.” I hated that, especially because if my drawer was low, I had to return the money. (I didn’t know I had rights.) One day all the managers were in a meeting and I was running low on quarters, I timidly asked if someone could get me some.

Manager: “No. Just make it work. Use dimes or nickels.”

I take a few more orders while asking if the customers happened to have any quarters. Finally, I’m down to one last quarter in the drawer. A customer orders, she has something like ninety cents in change owed to her.

Me: “I’m sorry, but do you have an extra dime? I’m out of quarters and don’t have enough to give you change.”

Customer: “How can you be out of f****** quarters!? Just get your manager!”

Me: “They’re over there. They’re all in a meeting right now and can’t give me any change.”

Customer: “Fine! Just give me whatever the f*** you do have then! Hurry up!”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, but again I’m out of quarters.”

I hand her ninety cents in one quarter, all my dimes, and a ton of nickels.

Customer: “What the f*** is this s***?! How dare you give me that much change!? I’m going to get you fired you stupid little b****!”

She goes to my managers, slams the money on the table, and yells at them for what I gave her. The manager refunded her money, gave her the order for free, and yelled at me for “not telling them I was low on quarters” and “how dare I give change like that to a customer” and “if you ever do that again you will be fired!”

A few months later I walked out while on shift, two coworkers walked out the same day when they found out I quit. Then over the next two weeks, almost every single employee that wasn’t a manager walked out, quit, or gave their two weeks notice. It’s been seven years and that fast food joint is still so understaffed that they hand out fliers begging people to apply.

The Great Resignation

Just Pay Your Bills, Dude

, , , , , | Right | May 17, 2022

I was working on-site for a client for several months. He then started questioning every point of the invoice.

Client: “I didn’t see you on Wednesday, so I am not going to pay you for it.”

Me: “I was here; you didn’t see me because you weren’t in the office on Wednesday.”

It was at this point that I decided to cease our relationship.

Pointing Out A Customer’s Own Stupidity Makes You The Rude One

, , , , | Right | May 13, 2022

It is a little after seven in the morning. I have just finished getting the cashier area set up for the day. It is important to note that our counter is very long, but there’s only one place to pay. The other side of the counter used to be used for loaner cars before the company pulled the plug on that. I keep that window closed at all times, and I have put up a sign saying to use the other window along with an arrow pointing to where the customer is supposed to be.

Not a lot of people read this sign. Because of where my computer is, I cannot see if a customer is at the counter unless they’re where they’re supposed to be. I can also see the parts counter from my desk.

This morning, I’m sitting at my desk reading my emails when I notice a customer at the parts counter. A moment later, a second customer gets in line behind the first customer. I keep an eye on the parts counter to see if the customer has to pay. The first customer leaves without paying and the second customer approaches the parts counter. I see them pointing to me, so I get up and go over to where the card reader is. The customer then goes over to the other side where the sign with the arrow is.

Me: “Sir, over here.”

The guy huffs but walks over to my window.

Customer: “I’m picking up a car.”

Me: “What was the name?”

Customer: *Mumbles*

Me: “What was that?”

Customer: “[Customer].”

I look through our finished tickets and pull his out.

Me: “Okay, it doesn’t look like you owe anything today. I just need you to sign here and here.”

I mark where I need him to sign and hand him the papers with a pen. He only signs in one spot.

Me: “Up here, as well.”

He signs and throws the pen down. We have a cup for used pens sitting on the customer’s side of the glass, but I decide not to press him on it.

Me: “Okay, and this is your copy and your keys. Have a good day.”

Customer: “What’s your name?”

Me: “[My Name].”

The customer leaves but not before complaining to the manager. A few minutes later, the manager comes over.

Manager: “That guy that was just here said you were very rude to him. What did you do?”

Me: “I asked him to move over here and sign stuff. He didn’t owe anything.”

Manager: “That’s it?”

Me: “Yeah. I mean, if he was standing where I can’t see before he got in the parts line, then I guess he thought I was ignoring him, but that’s what the sign is for.”

Manager: “Maybe you need a bigger sign.”