Closing The Door On Humanity

, , , , | Right | August 17, 2018

(I’m heading into the grocery story where there are two sets of sliding doors with the carts located in the middle. As I walk through the first doors I notice a cart parked blocking the interior doors. Inside the cart are tools and a tool box. Just inside the doors, a man is setting up a ladder and checking the automatic door sensor. I move to the side, get a cart, and wipe down the handle with the provided anti-bacterial wipes. By the time I finish this, the man has removed the ladder and is moving the cart away from the door.)

Me: “Can I enter through this door now?”

Maintenance Man: “Yes, ma’am, I’ve just finished my work.”

Me: “Thank you!”

Maintenance Man: “I don’t mean to take up your time, but I wanted to tell you that I’ve been here for an hour and you’re the first person to ask me if it’s okay to use this door.”

Me: *incredulously* “Really?!”

Maintenance Man: “I’ve had people push past me to get in and one woman even cussed at me when I told her she needed to use the other door.”

(He points to the “exit” door which is literally ten feet away.)

Me: “Well, thank you very much for fixing the door!”

(I left to do my shopping, wondering why people can’t just be nice!)

It’s A Running Problem

, , , , | Right | August 17, 2018

(I’m volunteering for a local race, packing up and handing out runner kits at a local community center. There’s a sign on the front desk with a bright red arrow pointing to the gym for kit pick-up. I’m hanging another sign nearby when a runner comes in, and walks right up to the front desk.)

Runner: “Where do I pick up my race kit?”

Front Desk: “Just to the right in the gym. There will be a sign right out front.”

Runner: *walks off in that general direction, having still not noticed either of the five-foot signs*

Me: “I thought the signs were big enough to be noticed, but I guess not.”

Front Desk: “He’s the third one today.”

Elevating Ridiculousness

, , , , | Right | August 16, 2018

(I work the customer service desk at a very large mall.)

Customer: “Where is [Store]?”

Me: “Second floor, down the hallway to the left.”

Customer: “How would I get to the second floor?”

Me: *gestures to elevators about twenty feet in front of us* “Those elevators right there.”

Customer: “What elevators? How do I get to the elevators?”

Me: “They’re right there, sir. Just go through the doors and it’ll take you right up.”

Customer: “Hmph! I guess I’ll have to take the stairs, then!” *walks back in opposite direction of elevators*

Someone Rescue Me From These Dumb Customers

, , , , , | Right | August 15, 2018

(I work ocean rescue in Florida, and we wear neon green shirts with red writing all over them loudly stating that we are OCEAN RESCUE, and listing where we are located, etc. I am visiting my friend in Chicago and while shopping at a store, I am wearing the aforementioned brightly-coloured shirt. A very obnoxious woman comes up and hits me with her cart.)

Lady: “Do you work here?”

(I didn’t think someone could be so blind and stupid because the uniform for that store is a black and blue shirt.)


Me: *finally figuring out she’s serious* “No—”

(She shoves her cart into me again, so angrily I grab the cart and say:)

Me: “Lady! You must be the dumb one! What part of ‘OCEAN RESCUE’ means that I work here? And if you hit me with your cart again, I will find someone who works here and file charges against you!”

(The lady grumbled to herself, and an associate finally walked over and asked if something was wrong. I relayed the entire story to her, and she asked if she could do anything for me. I told her thank you but no, I would just be on my way. It still bewilders me how stupid and unaware people are.)

Needs To Adopt Some Knowledge On The Subject

, , , , | Right | August 15, 2018

(I volunteer at a local animal shelter once per week. Since I worked part-time there last summer, the employees and I are on very good terms, so they don’t mind me offering advice to customers and getting them set up with the proper assistance. On this day, a woman I’d estimate to be about 60 comes into the shelter and stops in front of me while I’m folding laundry.)

Me: “Hi. Do you need any help?”

Customer: “Yes, I’m here to pick up Mack.”

(Mack is a very cute German Shepherd mix puppy we are accepting applications for; with puppies we tend to accept more than one applicant and then choose the best a day or two after the puppy is made available.)

Me: “Oh, um, do you mean you’d like to meet him outside the kennel?”

Customer: “No, I’m here to pick him up.”

Me: “Um… One moment, please.”

(I go and get [Employee], who runs the dog team.)

Employee: “So, I hear you’re interested in Mack?”

Woman: “Yes, I’d like to bring him home.”

Employee: “I’m sorry, but we’re not reviewing applications until tomorrow due to the high interest in him.”

Woman: “Applications?”

Employee: “Do… Do you have an application in on him?”

Woman: “Application?”

(It turned out the woman had no idea she needed to apply to adopt a dog! I later found out she had come by to try and adopt before with similar results. She didn’t get Mack, but she did fill out an application for another dog, so I guess she figured it out eventually. We all found the whole thing funny more than annoying, since she’s hardly the first one to make that mistake!)

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