Know When To Hold ‘Em And When To Fold ‘Em

, , , , , | Right | March 22, 2018

(I work on the tills at a well-known cheap clothing shop in the UK. I am packing the clothes that a customer has just bought into her bags.)

Customer: “No, no, stop that at once!”

Me: “What is the problem?”

Customer: “You’re packing that bag too haphazardly! My clothes will be wrinkled and ruined when I get them home!”

(At this shop, we are literally trained in how to pack bags to ensure that the clothes are folded neatly and the heavy items are on the bottom and the light ones are on the top. I have been following this training to the letter. I start to pack the bag exactly the same way as I was before, just slower.)

Customer: “There. That’s better! You’re actually folding the clothes now!”

A Cents-less Amount Of Confusion

, , , , , , , | Working | March 20, 2018

(I supervise the registers at a popular home goods store. One day, two employees are running the customer service registers, where people can also check out, and I’m directing traffic and basically cleaning up the messes that are everywhere. My two coworkers are [Cashier #1], a 19-year-old who has run a register for six months or so, and [Cashier #2], a 30-something who has worked for the company longer than I have and is technically my peer, though I’m always teaching her things. I’m finishing up with one customer when I realize that both my coworkers are standing by the same register.)

Me: “What’s going on? Maybe I can help.”

Cashier #2: “I can’t figure out the change to give her. I put it in wrong.”

(I look at the receipt that’s sitting on the counter. It says that the customer bought one item, the total was $6.28, and the customer paid $6.30.)

Me: “How much money did she actually give you?”

Cashier #2: “$6.35.”

Me: *not sure I heard that right* “So, she gave you five cents more than you put in the cash register?”

Cashier #2: “Yes.”

Me: “Then you give her five cents more than the cash register tells you to give.”

Cashier #2: *blank look*

Me: “Did you give her the two cents from the receipt?”

Cashier #2: “No, because I knew it wasn’t right!”

Me: “Okay, well, she gave you five cents more than the receipt says she gave you, so you give her five cents more than the register says to give her.”

Cashier #2: *same blank look*

Me: “Seven cents.”

(In the end, I have to reach into her register to pull the change out for the poor customer. After she leaves, the other cashier drops this line.)

Cashier #1: “I couldn’t figure it out, either, so I told her just to void the transaction.”

Me: “Wait, what? Did we re-ring it?”

Cashier #1: “I don’t know.”

(We counted the cashier’s drawer and, sure enough, it was over by $6.28. We still had the receipt from the return, so we were able to re-ring the purchase to even out her drawer and our inventory. The worst part is that not only did two grown women not know how to “fix” a five-cent mistake, but the older one is actually a teacher by day!)

The Future Is Out Of Apples

, , , , , | Right | March 19, 2018

(I’m a cashier at an express checkout. My coworker is there to let me out for my break. It’s not uncommon for customers to comment on the year — 1982, for example — if the purchase is around $20.)

Me: “Your total is [total].”

Customer: “Ah, what a wonderful year.” *pays and leaves*

Coworker: “Wait, what was his total?”

Me: “$63.78.”

Some Informational Baggage

, , , , , | Right | March 15, 2018

(England has just introduced a mandatory charge for carrier bags to larger businesses.)

Customer: *to my colleague* “This is ridiculous. Companies are just going to take advantage of this and it won’t make any difference.”

Me: “Actually, sir, the same law requires we donate all revenue, after VAT, to charity. We have our own foundation which donates to major charities, as well as taking submissions from lesser-known ones, so it is likely any revenue we make from bags will go to this. Furthermore, the charge reduced the use of bags in Wales to a fifth and has proven to be successful.”

(Both are in a stunned silence.)

Colleague: “Where did you learn that?”

Me: “[Variety Store] had huge posters next to the tills boasting the fact about Wales, and the charity point is on the cards warning about the charge.”

(The customer looked at the one I was pointing at, looking rather embarrassed.)

Should Have “Checked” Before Using

, , , , | Right | March 15, 2018

(It is back before many lower-end stores started putting in credit card machines. Debit cards are sometimes referred to as “check cards.”)

Me: “That’ll be $10.60.”

(The customer hands me a debit card.)

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry. We only take cash or check.”

Customer: “Yes. It’s a check card.”

Me: “I’m sorry; I’m afraid we don’t take debit cards.”

Customer: “You said you take checks.”

Me: “Yes, we do, but we don’t take debit cards.”

Customer: “This is a check card.”

Me: “Yes, but I’m afraid we have no way of processing cards.”

Customer: “It works the same as a check.”

Me: “The bank may process it like a check, but we have no way to process it at all.”

Customer: “The bank says it works like a check. It is a check card and you take checks!”

Me: “I’m sorry, but we don’t take cards of any kind. We only take cash and paper checks.”


Me: “A card requires some type of machine for us to swipe the card in. We have no way of doing that. I’m sorry, but you need to pay with either cash or a paper check.”

Customer: *stomps away while screaming* “IT’S A CHECK CARD! IT WORKS THE SAME AS A CHECK! THE BANK SAID SO!”

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