Don’t Bank On The Rank

, , , , | Working | December 7, 2018

Back in the early 2000s I was in the Territorial Army, the UK equivalent of the National Guard. I served for around five years or so before being honourably discharged. One Christmas I put my name down to work as staff for the officers’ and NCOs’ annual dinner.

During the dinner, I ended up working behind the bar in the officers’ mess. One of our “clients” for the evening was a young officer I knew well enough to consider a personal friend. He had just been promoted from Lieutenant to Captain, and so was spending his evening buying drinks for his fellow officers, and having drinks bought for him.

At one point during the evening, this officer staggered up to the bar. I could see that he was very drunk. “Hi, [My Name]!” he slurred, smiling at me. He ordered another drink for himself. “Are you sure that’s wise, sir?” I asked. My officer friend smiled and said it would be fine. I gave him his drink.

A few minutes later, the duty sergeant, who was behind the bar with me, took me aside for a “chat.” He told me that I must never question an officer, that I should have just given him his drink without question. “But sergeant, he can hardly stand!” I protested. The sergeant nodded sadly. “I can see that,” he said. “But you’re a private, and he’s a newly-promoted captain.” I sighed, shrugged and said, “Okay, sergeant.”

The next morning I learnt what had happened to my officer friend. He was leaving the officers’ mess, tripped, fell down a flight of stairs, and ended up in hospital with a fractured skull.

I learnt two things that night: 1. Just because someone wears a rank it doesn’t mean they always behave responsibly or are always right. 2. Rules are often necessary to create order, but sometimes, rules are complete bulls***.

Unfiltered Story #124568

, , | Unfiltered | October 29, 2018

(I work at a military facility listening to radios and answering phones. One day I got the strangest call I’ve ever received in three years on the job…)

Me: “Good morning, (military facility) this is (my name) speaking. How may I help you?”

(Very old) Caller: “Hello, I live in (next town over) and I have an apointment with Dr. Taylor today. I’m on an oxygen tank so I won’t be able to make it in.”

(note: I have no idea who Dr. Taylor is, I have never heard of him and we definitely don’t have a medical facility at our base.)

Me: “Uh… I’m sorry Ma’am, this is (military facility).”

Caller: “Yes, and I can’t make it in to see Dr. Taylor today because I’m on oxygen! I need to reschedule my appointment!”

Me: “I’m sorry Ma’am, but you’re going to have to call your doctor’s office. This is (military facility). We help mariners and deal with search and rescue….”

Caller: “Oh, so Dr. Taylor doesn’t pick up his messages here??”

Me: “Um….no.”

Caller: “Well that’s weird, he must have just stopped. Well thanks for your help young lady, I’ll try to find another number for him….” *Click*

Coworker: “….why would any doctor pick up their messages at a search and rescue base?”

Unfiltered Story #122350

, , , , | Unfiltered | October 5, 2018

(I am doing an online/web-call training with my manager and supervisor.  Supervisor is manning the desk and has to leave to answer the front desk phone)

Supervisor:  OMG I just got the dumbest question ever.

Manager:  What Happened?

Supervisor:  Guest is due to checkout and wanted to know if she needed to extend another night if she had to pay for it.

Me:  Let me get this straight, she wants to stay an extra night for free just because she doesn’t want to drive due to the snow that we all knew was coming over 4 days ago.

Supervisor:  Yes, and she got irate when I told her that she had to pay, since she is saying she doesn’t have any extra money.

Manager and Me:  She should have planned ahead better.

Code Blue: Lazy Coworker!

, , , | Working | September 25, 2018

(I work on a Navy ship. I go into my work-center one morning and see something I never even imagined I’d ever see. The filters for electronic equipment I am responsible for have turned BLUE over the weekend. It turns out my coworkers had to repaint a door and sanded it down in the work-center first; thus, the blue paint dust got sucked into my equipment’s filters. Cleaning the filters falls under a specific maintenance plan, and this one is a monthly “check.” However, by the rules, I can slip in an extra one if the need arises, as long as I tell the work-center supervisor.)

Me: “Hey, [Supervisor]. My equipment is… blue. I’m going to do the M1 check on it.”

Supervisor: “Okay. Thanks for the heads up.”

(Some time later:)

Coworker: “Hey, [My Name]… That check was scheduled for me this week, anyway.”

Me: “Was it? Okay, well, it’s done now. I wasn’t going to leave it with blue filters.”

Coworker: “Well… you’re not going to do the rest of my checks, too?”

Me: “Seriously?”

Coworker: “Yeah, you should do the rest of my checks, too!”

(Yes, my coworker was annoyed that I didn’t do the rest of his work for him. He didn’t care that the job needed to be done immediately — obviously dirty filters are an electronic safety issue! He just felt I should have done the rest of his work for him, too.)

The Lone Bay State

, , , , , | Right | September 13, 2018

(My mother works in Massachusetts, processing tuition paperwork for soldiers attending college, so she receives a lot of calls not only from soldiers but also from their families. Her supervisor is originally from Texas, and she relates this story to me one day.)

Supervisor: “You’ve reached the education department. How may I help you?”

Out-Of-State Caller: *excited* “Ooh! So that’s what a Massachusetts accent sounds like!”

(They would also frequently get callers mispronouncing Worcester as “War-chester.” It’s “wuss-stir,” or “wuss-da” with a Boston accent.)

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