Thanks A Lot, Dad

, , , , , , , , | Related | November 26, 2020

I was laid off during the health crisis. I receive an offer for an even better-paying job, but it will take me out of the country and will take a long time to process my paperwork. As a result, I have to take another job to get me through the time period between the two positions.

The position I end up taking moves me from Michigan to Hawaii. The pay is substantially less than what I was making in Michigan but I figure that the experience working for the government is still very helpful for my career plans; plus, I get to live in a new place that few people get to experience.

While I know that living in Hawaii will come with its own unique drawbacks, the reality of the situation turns out to be worse than I anticipated. I’ve gone from having my own two-bedroom apartment to myself and putting thousands into my savings account every month to sharing a townhouse with two girls half my age who came to Hawaii to drink and party.

I am disappointed with the low pay rate offered by my subcontracting company. I manage to talk them up a little bit, but the rates they offer for mid- and senior-level positions are still unusually low for my field. I figure that not all contracts are created equal and maybe the government just isn’t paying them that much. Oh, how naively trusting I am. I talk about my pay rate with coworkers with fewer qualifications working lower roles and they ALL make more than me. It turns out that I have a really cheap staffing agency.

I still have plenty of savings, but I’m cutting costs to stay within my temporary budget because I’m trying to save my money. This also means that I am unable to return home for Thanksgiving.

All in all, I am really not liking life in Hawaii. I’m talking to my dad, griping about my life, and discussing holiday plans.

Me: “I’m going to splurge this week for Thanksgiving. Instead of my usual five-dollar frozen pizza, I’m going to splurge for a ten-dollar frozen pizza.”

Dad: “We’re going to be having yams, broccoli casserole, stuffing, prime rib… a pie…”

Me: “Well, Dad, I wish you a happy Thanksgiving and a hearty f**** you!”

My dad just laughed.

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Lei Lined With Entitlement

, , , | Right | November 18, 2020

I hurt my back the day before we go to Maui, and my mom offers to get my luggage while I sit by a small stand that’s selling flowered and beaded necklaces. The worker nods and smiles and talks to a lady walking up. The lady is about fifty and has a husband standing behind her.

Worker: “Hello, ma’am. Would you like to purchase a lei?”

Annoying Lady: “I want one beaded and one flowered.”

Worker: “Of course. The flowers come in five colors and the beaded is wood right here.”

The lady finds her items and walks back over.

Worker: “Your total is $25. Cash or card?”

Annoying Lady: *Yelling* “Are you kidding me?! Those two items should not be over $15. No, you will give them to me for $10.”

The worker steps back as the woman is in her face.

Worker: “I’m sorry, but that is the price and I cannot change it.”

Annoying Lady: “How dare you try to scam me out of my money?! My husband gave me $15 to spend. He works very hard. He is the CEO back home. Give it to me!”

She tries to take the necklace and starts to walk back.

Worker: “Ma’am, this is an airport. You think that you will not be caught on camera for shoplifting?”

She quickly drops the items and runs out of the section.

Worker: “Sorry you had to see that.”

Me: “It’s okay. It’s not your fault some people can be so entitled.”

She offered to give me a discount.

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Maybe It’s Mildly Spicy?

, , , | Right | November 6, 2020

I am working in the drive-thru section with my coworker. She is on the headset, taking a customer’s order.

Coworker: “Okay, I have you down for [order]. Would you like that mild or spicy?”

Customer: “Um… Is the mild spicy?”

Coworker: “Sorry?”

Customer: “Is the mild spicy?”

Coworker: “The mild is mild, and the spicy is spicy.”

Customer: “Oh… I’ll just have regular, then.”

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That’s Not At All Vague Or Creepy

, , , , , | Working | September 3, 2020

I’ve worked in this department store for several years, and I have had a number of customers approach me with “job offers” after I finish helping them. I’ve just ordered an item to be delivered to a young woman since the one in stock had a small defect.

Me: “That should arrive within two weeks, and here’s a copy of your order slip. Can I help you with anything else?”

Customer: “Just that, thank you. You do great customer service.”

Me: “Thank you!”

Cue the red flag that a lot of these people use.

Customer: “Are you satisfied with your job here?”

Me: “I enjoy it, yes. My hours are pretty flexible, so I can change them when my college schedule changes.”

Customer: “Oh, okay. Well, I was really impressed by your customer service, so if you wanted to earn more money, I’d love to give your number to my bosses. They’re not really hiring right now, but if I tell them about you I’m sure they’d consider it.”

Me: “For what kind of job?”

Customer: “Selling.”

Me: “Selling what?”

Customer: “Assets.”

Me: “What does the company do?”

Customer: “It sells assets to people.”

Me: “What kind of assets?”

Customer: “Assets.”

Me: “…”

As “tempting” as that was, I stuck it out with the store and got a new job by finishing my degree.

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Please Sub This Employee For Someone Competent

, , , , , | Working | June 29, 2020

I am third in line at a popular US sandwich shop. A man, [Customer #1], and a lady, [Customer #2], are in front of me. This particular place — not the chain, just this location — isn’t known for its speediness so I am very glad there isn’t a long line.

[Customer #1] orders a BMT. A new girl, [Employee #1], has to ask her manager what meats those are, but she eventually gets it.

Another employee, [Employee #2], a male in his twenties, skips [Customer #2] and asks what I want. I point to [Customer #2] and tell him to help her first. She orders two sandwiches; he gets the meat wrong on one of them and fixes it, all the time trying to get my attention and ask where I work, etc. He puts one of her sandwiches in the toaster and he starts working on mine.

[Customer #1] needs another sandwich, just a simple meatball and cheese, so the girl starts working on that. Finally, after it gets toasted, it gets moved up to in front of the veggies, but for some reason it’s not packed up and the customer just stands there waiting to pay. 

Meanwhile, [Customer #2]’s sandwich has been in the toaster way too long and is burned. She requests a replacement sandwich after the flirty guy just scrapes the charred blackness onto the sandwich. He keeps the meat and places fresh bread under the meat and tries to toast it. [Customer #2] again tells him no, that won’t work; she needs a completely new sandwich. He remakes it, messing up again on her meat order, finally gets it right, and puts hers and mine on the toaster tray.

I tell him to take mine off and he does, and then puts it back on. I tell him, “No, take mine off, and please finish both of their sandwiches before continuing to make mine.”

All this time, [Customer # 1]’s toasted meatball sandwich is still not wrapped up and is sitting — now cold — on the counter. [Customer #1] is finally able to pay and leave after new girl almost gives him one of [Customer #2]’s sandwiches.

I start thinking we’re finally getting somewhere. They start working on the veggies on mine, and [Employee #2] starts talking with the supervisor on duty who has stepped behind the till just to help the line move real quick — she was on her lunch — and he starts arguing with her on the best way to ring up [Customer #2].

That finally gets resolved while the rest of us customers stand around awkwardly and the supervisor leaves because she’s just fed up with how he was telling her off in front of everyone. When he gets to the last ingredient on my sandwich, oregano, and I’m excited to just get out of this place. The top of the container falls off and the entire contents of the jar are emptied onto my sandwich.

[Employee #2] tries to laugh it off and say, “Wasn’t that funny? I thought that was funny; don’t you think so? That’s never happened before. Jeez, that was hilarious.”

By this time, everyone in the line is rolling our eyes at each other and thinking, “Oh, my God, can this get any worse? Can you believe this?”

I go back to the beginning of the line to have my sandwich remade and I watch him carefully as he’s made at least three significant mistakes already. He doubles two of the meats on my BMT –the Sub of the Day — and it is intentional; he has no idea how much meat is supposed to be on it. But there is no way I am going to tell him otherwise at this point.

He leaves my sandwich and [Employee #1] finishes it. She does an amazing job. [Employee #2] rings me up, all the time talking about how people were giving [Employee #1] a hard time — no one was — and how she just needed to do it at her pace and she’d get it done. I was more thinking that he needed the help, not her.

Then, I notice before I pay that he’s rung me up for the full price; as the Sub of the Day, my sandwich should be almost two dollars cheaper than that. I tell him that, and he’s like, “What’s the Sub of the Day?”

It’s 7:30 pm by this time; they close in less than two hours. You’d think he would know what it was by now. But, I finally get my extra-meat sandwich for the correct price and practically run out of the shop.

It took them thirty minutes for two people to make four sandwiches correctly, and the person on her first day completed more sandwiches and they were done correctly than the “experienced” guy who was supposed to train her.

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