Not Doing A B.A.M. Up Job

, , , , , , | Working | November 18, 2018

(I work at a franchise location of a national restaurant chain. After a looong renovation, it has finally reopened as a flagship store for the entire company. Because of this, our owner, district manager, marketing rep, etc. have been there every day during our busy period to help and to work out the kinks. Unfortunately, many of our old staff found other jobs during the six months we were closed, so most of our staff is new, and some are less than stellar employees. One morning, a newer employee calls to say he is going to be late, over two hours after his shift starts. He speaks to a manager with a common name, let’s say Dan. He keeps cutting Dan off and finally hangs up. He calls back a few minutes later, and our district manager — basically the highest authority other than the owners — answers. Our district manager is also named Dan.)

District Manager: “Thank you for calling [Store]; this is Dan.”


District Manager: “Yes, this is Dan. What’s up, [Employee]?”


District Manager: “No, you didn’t speak to me earlier… No, you really didn’t… No, I’m not messing with you,[Employee]; you didn’t talk to me… Yes, this is Dan, but I think I’d know if I’d spoken to you in the last ten minutes… You didn’t talk to me, man…”


District Manager: *perfectly calm* “I’m sorry, but there’s no one here named B****-A**-Motherf***er.” *hangs up*

(The district manager walks over to the other Dan, still completely calm, and says in a conversational tone of voice:)

District Manager: “[Employee] no longer works here.”

Triggering A Very Powerful Off Switch

, , , , | Working | November 13, 2018

(I work in a call center. Outside is a break room where people go to smoke. Sitting across from me is a guy sullenly eating a pizza. His phone starts to chime, and he hits a button to silence it. Again it happens, and then again.)

Coworker: “Hey, buddy! I’m on break! Can you shut off your—”

(He hasn’t finished the sentence when the guy stands up and throws his cell phone hard, past the smoking area, where it crashes hard into the pavement, shattering and splintering into pieces.)

Sullen Guy: “IT’S OFF NOW!” *walks inside without a word*

Office-Based Frustration On The Rise, As Coworkers’ Attachment To Incompetence Leads To Inability To Open Attachments

, , , , | Working | November 12, 2018

Me: “I completed the first draft of the user manual. Please find it attached to this email for review. It can also be accessed on the local company server at the following link: [link].”

Coworker: *reply all, CCing all sixteen people on the thread* “I am out of the country and I cannot access the local server; please send it as an attachment.”

Me: *directly to coworker with no one else CCd* “Hi. It’s possible you missed it, but I attached the draft to the previous email because I knew you were out of the country. In any case, I’ve attached it to this email, as well.”

(Several days later:)

Me: “Hi, all. Thank you for your feedback! Please find attached the second draft of the manual, incorporating your comments. It can also be accessed on the local company server at the following link: [link]. If everyone approves this draft I will release the finalized document.”

Coworker: *reply ALL again* “I’m still out of the country; attach the draft to the email! I can’t download from the local server!”

Me: *directly to coworker* “Here you go.”

(Ever since then, I always bold the phrase, “Please find attached…” If he replies to another huge thread asking for an attachment that I already sent, I’m going to start writing it in ALL CAPS, maybe in red. I don’t want to embarrass the dude, but he’s doing a pretty good job of it without my help.)

Managers Who Don’t Listen To Their Staff Are Late To Realize Their Own Folly

, , , , , | Working | November 10, 2018

(I work in a story in the mall. The store is pretty big, and we keep the gates closed when we’re not open, so whenever someone comes in for an opening shift, they have to buzz in and wait for a manager to come open the gate. Generally, opening shifts begin around 9:00, and the store opens at 10:00. Yesterday, my coworker was ten minutes late. Our manager spoke to her about it, and she promised that it wouldn’t happen again. Today, at 9:45 she buzzes to be let in. I witness the following interaction.)

Manager: “Come on, [Coworker]. We just talked about this. You can’t just come in whenever you feel like it.”

Coworker: “But—”

Manager: “I mean, five, even ten minutes, and I can look the other way, but it’s 9:45. It’s not fair to anyone else who’s opening.”

Coworker: “I’m not—”

Manager: “I don’t care, okay? You already had one warning, and the next day, you’re even later! You can’t do that. I’m going to have to write you up.”

Coworker: “It’s not—”

Manager: “What? What do you have to say for yourself?”

Coworker: “I’m not scheduled to open today. My shift doesn’t start until 10:00. I came in now so that I could be sure that I was early.”

Manager: *pause* “Next time, you should say so.”

A Mistake In Assigning The Mistakes

, , , , | Working | November 9, 2018

(I’m in my first job after college. I’ve been in the job for a little over a year. I have recently bought my first ever car and am, of course, ecstatic. Everyone keeps asking about the car because they know that I’ve been walking to work. I overhear a couple of coworkers talking about me and how, due to my excitement about having a car, I am not paying attention to my job and am making mistakes in my highly-detailed data-entry job. Later in the day, one of them has decided to confront me about these mistakes.)

Coworker: “I know you are excited about having a car, but you really need to calm down and pay attention, because you are making a lot of mistakes.”

Me: “Okay, can you tell me what mistakes I’ve made?”

(The coworker gives me a list of the three mistakes. After she leaves, I look them up. I then walk back to her office.)

Me: “Well… [Mistake #1] wasn’t me. That was done about three weeks before I even started this job. [Mistake #2] also wasn’t me. That was the week I was on vacation, so I wasn’t even here. [Mistake #3] was me, but that happened two weeks after I started the job.”

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