Two young women, possibly teenagers, are having a loud and animated conversation at my checkout lane.

Customer #1: “No, if they say you’re under arrest, you just say you’re over arrest. And then they have to let you go.”

Customer #2: “Oh, over arrest, like ‘I’m so over it’?”

Customer #1: “Exactly! It’s a secret hack, like those special fries at In-N-Out. My daddy is a lawyer, so I know these things…”

And off they went into the wild… with the ability to drive and vote…

I overheard this interaction at a coffee shop.

Customer: “Can I get the [sandwich]? No cheese.”

Cashier: “What kind?”

Customer: “What kind of what?”

Cashier: “We have white cheddar, Swiss, provolone, and pepper jack.”

Customer: “I said I didn’t want cheese on it.”

Cashier: “But what kind?”

Customer: “No cheese at all.”

Cashier: *Becoming flustered* “I understand that, ma’am, but I still have to put into the computer what kind of cheese you’re not getting.”

Related:
A Fun Twist On “Cheeseburger With No Cheese”

A family is looking at cameras in the electronics section. A three-year-old boy takes a picture of his dad. 

Boy: “Wow, what a pretty picture!”

He takes a picture of his mom.

Boy: “Wow, what a pretty camera!”

Me: *Failed attempt not to snort-laugh*

I overhear this conversation between a child and his father.

Child: “Hey, Dad, what does ‘misanthropic’ mean?”

Father: “It means someone who likes dogs more than humans.”

Child: “…Huh. I guess I’m misanthropic?”

Father: “Most people are, son. Most people are.”

I am checking out a customer who is here with her daughter and her mother, so three generations of women. The daughter — four years old — is having a great time talking to herself. The grandmother seems to be upset by this.

Grandma: “It’s totally inappropriate for her to have an imaginary friend, and I’m embarrassed by it!”

Mom: *To Grandma* “You get on your knees every night and talk to your sky friend and ask him to forgive you for gambling even though you play the lottery every week. She’s a four-year-old girl. What’s your excuse?”