Time Waits For No Pizza

, , , , , | Right | July 15, 2018

We have a system at our franchise where everyone who calls in or orders online gets a call-back before we make their pizzas. No exceptions. Even phone orders.

A timed order comes in to be picked up at four pm. No problem. Then, a few moments later, it is voided: “Did not answer, could not confirm. Do not make.”

The boss recognises the lady — she’s a regular — so on the off chance this was just a mistake, we make the pizzas but put them in the cooler, ready to go in.

Four pm rolls around, and she’s not there. Four fifteen, not there. We are about to use the pizzas for other orders when she comes in at about 4:25. When we explain we don’t have the pizzas in because of lack of confirmation, she gets upset — not at us, mind you, but at the situation. She has a birthday party! She’s in a hurry!

I explain that pizzas were made, and we can have her order ready in seven minutes. After a few moments of reassurance, she departs, to return in “exactly seven minutes.”

The pizzas come out — we bumped them ahead of a few others — we cut them, box them up, and put them on the heater as fast as we can. By now it is about 4:35.

And we wait… and wait… Finally, at around five, she strolls in, just as I am about to mark the pizzas for “immediate sale.”

So much for being in a hurry.

Everyone Gets Fired

, , , , , | Working | July 15, 2018

I work at a big fast food chain. A coworker who works the front counter is annoyed by our slower work speed in the back, due one of the deep fryer elements being stuck half out of the oil. They decide to come see why we are slower.

Seeing the lid on the fryer, which is an obvious sign that it has a fault, the coworker decides to turn it on without asking why it is off and covered, and walks away without telling anyone the fryer is now on.

A few minutes pass, and now smoke is seen coming out from under the lid. [Coworker #2] decides to take the lid off to see why. That causes the fryer to burst into flames. Seeing the danger, [Coworker #2] grabs the nearby fire blanket and covers the fire…

…only to see the blanket also catch fire, as it’s out of date and has not been inspected in years. [Coworker #3] sees this happen and grabs the nearby extinguisher for oil fires and empties it all on the flames…

…only to see them still burning, as the extinguisher — like the blanket — is also out of date and has not been inspected in years. [Coworker #3] then grabs another extinguisher and empties it on the flames, with no effect ,due to the same problem as the blanket and first extinguisher.

The fire brigade arrives and finally puts out the fire. In the end, [Coworker #1], who started the whole thing, doesn’t get in any trouble, and the store gets regular checks on all its fire prevention equipment.

That’s Some Truly Wonderful Bulls***

, , , , , , | Friendly | July 15, 2018

My husband’s sister was going to be nearby on business, so my husband and I decided we would drive to the city where she was staying to take her out for dinner. About 15 minutes before we arrived, I told my husband this rather long story about two women who bump into each other after not seeing each other for a few years.

The first woman was telling the second all the (rather unbelievable) things that had been happening in her life and after each one, the second woman would say, “Wow! That’s wonderful!” When the first woman finally asked the second what she had been doing lately, the second replied that she’d been going to charm school. “Oh, really? What do they teach you in charm school?” “They teach us to say, ‘Wow! That’s wonderful!’ instead of, ‘Bulls***.’”

Hubby chuckled at the joke and that was the end of it, or so he thought.

We were sitting there enjoying a meal and listening to my sister-in-law go on and on about her wonderful son — think the male version of the Princess Ballerina Astronaut. When she finally slowed down enough to draw breath, I commented, “Wow! That’s wonderful!”

Poor hubby snorted milk out his nose halfway across the restaurant.

The Snow Comes Down And The Writing Goes Up

, , , , , , | Working | July 14, 2018

I was working overnight shift at a 24-hour call center. My typical commute was about 25 minutes. About an hour and a half before my usual departure time, we were hit with an unexpected, terrible ice storm, making the roads nearly impassable and disabling traffic signals. Knowing that if I was to arrive at work anywhere near on time, I was going to have to leave extra early, I set out. The main roads were practically standstill so I took back roads as much as possible, but even with such an early start I was late arriving. While I was driving, it was announced on the news that the city was in a state of emergency and, unless it was imperative that a person needed to drive, it was advised to stay off the roads. I was already halfway there, so it would have been just as bad to turn back. Although I’d called on the way to advise on the conditions and my slow progress, and only a few of us who were scheduled that night were able to make it in, all of us late, we were all written up the following day for being tardy, or for not showing up. We collectively filed a grievance.

About a week later we were informed that the write-ups were to be removed from our files. It seems the HR review determined that since it took the day shift workers hours to get home, they could not have expected us to be able to make the drive any faster to work, and they were wrong to require that we be there at all when the city was shut down, as we were not considered critical employees. Each of us who did show up that night actually ended up with a commendation and small bonus!


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From Hogwarts To Middle-Earth Before They Give Up

, , , , , , | Learning | July 13, 2018

In my freshman year of high school, my biology teacher believed that if you were reading in class you were being distracted, regardless of whether or not you had finished your work. I am a bit of a bookworm, so I always have a book with me for when I finish my work. Every time I did this, she would stand behind me and then grab my book. Sometimes she gave it back at the end of class, and sometimes I had to wait a week.

One day I was reading the first Harry Potter book, and she took the book away. I then took out the second book, and this repeated until the end of class when I was on the seventh book. I didn’t get my books back until Friday, but I brought Lord of the Rings the next day.

Eventually she just started sending me out of the room.

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