Kid Earns A High Five

, , , , | Friendly | October 16, 2017

(The young son of one of our regulars is the cutest thing. He goes up to my coworker with a pack of cards that we give away for free, as a promotion for a game his dad plays, and he says, in his tiny voice:)

Kid: “Is it okay I took this? It says ‘thirteen plus.’ I’m five.”

Coworker: “That’s okay; we won’t tell.”

(We both had a good laugh at his seriousness. Ah, the logic of a five-year-old.)

Pokémon Gold And Old

, , , , , | Right | October 6, 2017

(I am working in the gaming department. A couple and their young son of about six are looking for a game.)

Me: *to the kid* “What’s your favorite game?”

Kid: “Uh… I dunno.”

Me: “My favorite game is Pokémon.”

Kid: “No, it’s not!”

Me: “What do you mean?”

Kid: *defiantly* “Grown-ups can’t play video games.”

Chauvinism Is Soooo Fourth-Generation Console

, , , , , , | Right | October 6, 2017

(I’m working in the gaming department of an electronics store. At this time, our store’s gaming department is ranked #1 in the company, due in no small part to a female coworker who is very knowledgeable, skilled at selling, and personable. However, this situation plays out several times.)

Coworker: “[My Name], can you see if that group of customers needs anything? I asked them, and they said no, but I think it’s because I’m a girl.”

Me: “No problem.”

(I walk over to the group of teenage boys.)

Me: “Hey, guys, is there anything I can help you with?”

Customer: “Yeah, we’re wondering if [Game] is any good.”

Me: “You know what? I haven’t had a chance to play that one yet. But I do have a coworker that has, and knows everything about it. I’ll be right back.”

Customer: “Thanks!”

Me: *returning with my female coworker* “[Coworker], these guys had a question about [Game]. Can you help them?”

Customer: “Uh…” *silence, embarrassment*

(That coworker ended up getting a job in the gaming industry. To this day, I’m convinced that I will never know as much about games as her.)

Make Love, Not Warcraft, Fifth Expansion

, , , , , , , | Romantic | October 5, 2017

I am 18, and have a boyfriend who is addicted to World of Warcraft. Sometimes his addiction gets the better of him.

We are standing in the kitchen talking about something, and in the middle of my sentence, he leaves the kitchen and walks into our bedroom, where the computer is, where he proceeds to sit for about ten minutes.

He then comes out, and asks if I had been saying something before he left the kitchen.

It turns out he had gotten an idea about WoW, and had to go play it right that second. He hadn’t even heard a word I said.

Grand Theft Innocence, Part 14

, , , , | Right | October 2, 2017

(I’m a regular at a video game store. While I don’t know all of the games, I’m familiar with popular franchises. I’m hanging out at the store and talking to the manager when a woman and her young son, maybe ten, come in.)

Mother: “What game were you looking for?”

Son:Grand Theft Auto! The newest one!”

(The manager gets a pained look on her face. I step aside from the counter as they go to buy the game.)

Manager: “Is this all today?”

Mother: “Yeah, I guess.”

Manager: “I’ll need to check your ID.”

Mother: “What for? I’m only buying it.”

Manager: “Ma’am, it’s rated Mature. Store policy says I have to ask for your ID to make sure you can buy this.”

Mother: “Oh, hold on…”

(As she’s getting her ID out, I speak up.)

Me: “Ma’am, do you even know what this game is?”

Mother: “No, it’s for my kid. I don’t play video games.”

Me: “I’ll warn you that it’s incredibly violent, and has offensive language and content.”

Mother: “Oh? Like what?”

(The kid is glaring at me now, but I continue.)

Me: “There’s the option of buying prostitutes off of street corners, or visiting a strip club and getting a private dance. Plus, there are characters that will use profanity.”

Mother: “WHAT?!” *turns to her son* “YOU SAID IT WAS ABOUT STOPPING CRIMINALS!”

Son: “She’s lying! She doesn’t play video games; she’s a f***ing GIRL!”

(The woman drags her still-yelling son out of the store. My manager looks at me.)

Manager: “Hey, [My Name], want a job here?”

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