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We’re Beerly Acquaintances, Let Alone Friends

, , , | Right | September 23, 2021

I work in a small town’s only liquor store. Being a small town, we learn our regulars and know some of their names. I have one couple that comes in and the husband has somehow come to believe that we’re friends and this gives him an “in.” Because of that, he’s always asking for a discount which I never give.

They come in and the wife immediately makes eye contact and subtly shakes her head no, so I know I’m in for something.

Husband: “Can you do me a favor?”

Me: “Possibly.”

Husband: “I get paid tomorrow; can I get a six-pack now?”

Me: “If you have the money.”

Husband: “You won’t let me pay tomorrow?”

Me: “I absolutely am not risking my job for that.”

Husband: “What if I leave you my phone?”

Me: “Your six-pack is not worth my children’s food.”

This isn’t the only time someone’s tried to get credit here, but I haven’t seen them since.

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Great Babbling Babblu!

, , , , | Right | CREDIT: Cintanyervadasz | September 7, 2021

I was a university student working in a liquor store. We had many tourists come to buy Scotch of all types and prices.

One evening, an entourage of older tourists dropped in. One of them started yelling at us.

Customer: “Babblu! I need Babblu!”

There is no whisky named Babblu; however, we’re used to this, so my colleague and I showed the gentleman our selection of Balblair and asked which he’d like, explaining to him the different varieties and how they’re going to be the last generation of “year” statements, and so on.

My colleague and I are both young and female, which didn’t appeal to this guy. He stuck his nose up, alluding that we didn’t know as much as he did — false; combined, we know a lot — and even called himself a “whisky connoisseur.” He chose based on the price — the lowest — and wanted three. It came to about £112 which, in the grand scheme of things, wasn’t that much.

I asked whether he wanted a bag. He gruffed and refused, so I rung him up for the three whiskies, gave him the receipt, signed some tax forms, and thanked him.

He didn’t leave.

Customer: “Give me a bag.”

Me: “Oh, sorry, sir. You said you didn’t need one! It’s an extra 5p, but you can just put it in our charity box.”

Customer: “5p? You mean I’ve just come all the way from [Town] and bought hundreds of pounds of whisky, and you want me to pay 5p for a plastic bag?”

Me: “Yes, it’s the law here. If we don’t abide by the law, then our license could get revoked. It all goes to charity; we’ve chosen WaterAid so that people from the most deprived countries can get access to water.”

Customer: “But that’s disgraceful. I can’t believe you’re going to charge me 5p. I won’t stand for it! This is awful!”

Colleague: “It’s the law. Think about the future; plastic bag waste has gone down 80% since the price was introduced and the money all goes to charity.”

The old man LOST HIS MIND and screamed at us.

Customer: “Charity?! I’m a charity!”

He and his entourage stormed out, carrying the heavy weight of three Babblu whiskies between the three of them. I have since referred to Balblair as Babblu in his honour.

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Acting Age-Appropriate

, , , , | Right | August 6, 2021

I go to a local bottle shop that I’ve frequented before to pick out some wine, beers, and whisky.

While I am twenty-eight, people tend to mistake me for much, much younger. When I graduated university last year, many thought my “graduation” referred to high school. I have found, however, since getting new glasses and getting my hair cut, along with wearing sleeveless shirts — essentially showing off my arm tattoos — I’ve not been mistaken for a child any longer. This occurs while I am at the register, paying for my purchases.

A group of young guys comes into the store. Each is holding a skateboard and they are all kind of scruffy. One in particular is in the lead; the others appear to be following him.

Cashier: “Fellas, can I see your IDs, please?”

Lead Scruffy Guy: “What the h***? We haven’t even tried to buy anything yet!”

Cashier: “The minute you step into a bottle shop, you have to prove you’re old enough to be here. ID, please.”

They complain amongst themselves as I pay for my purchases. They focus their attention on me.

Lead Scruffy Guy: “Did he ask you for your ID?”

Me: “No.”

Lead Scruffy Guy: *Looking very angry* “Well, why not? That’s so unfair!”

Cashier: *Cutting across them* “Because she, unlike you, looks like she’s over twenty-five! Anyone who looks under needs to be ID’d. If you have no ID, I must ask you to leave.”

The guys look at me as if trying to judge my age. I look the lead guy right in the eye.

Me: “I’m twenty-eight.”

The guys start complaining, but seeing the cashier isn’t going to budge, they ultimately leave as none have ID on them and they cannot prove their ages. The cashier looks at me, seemingly mortified. 

Cashier: “I’m so sorry about that. I don’t mean to say that you look old, just…”

Me: “Mate, until recently, people have thought I’m still in high school! Trust me when I say that someone thinking I look my actual age is the biggest compliment I can get.”

The cashier just smiled at me, relieved that I wasn’t offended, and I left the shop with a cool story to tell my friends.

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How Dare You Buy Stuff We Have In Stock?!

, , , , , , , | Working | June 30, 2021

Due to the current health crisis, my husband and I have tried to figure out ways to limit the number of visits to various stores. We also enjoy having some beer on the weekend. Instead of going to the beer store once or twice a week, we decide to buy a month’s supply at a time. This happens while we’re checking out at the beer store.

Husband: *To the cashier* “Hi, I’ve got [number] cases here.”

Cashier: *Sucks her teeth and replies with an instant attitude* “You know, that only leaves us with [other number] of cases to sell to other customers.”

Husband: “Well, I’ll be putting this on a debit card.”

The transaction is completed. The cashier calls out to my husband as he is exiting the store.

Cashier: “And I don’t appreciate you coming in here when we are due to close in twenty minutes!”

I was shocked by the interaction when my husband told me. I have felt the attitude from that particular clerk before. I know the owner by sight and made a mental note to speak with him the next time I saw him around town. When I told him, he apologized to me and told me that his clients can buy however much of something that they want and can walk in with one minute until closing if they want. He told me that it was not the first complaint about that cashier and if there was one more, she would be gone. She must have had another complaint because I never saw her in the store again.

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Manager In (Need Of More) Training

, , , , , | Working | June 21, 2021

We have a manager-in-training (MIT) program where I work. Usually, people get promoted within the company from store level to a Third Key Manager and work their way up from there to assistant manager, store manager, etc. With our MIT program, we hire people from outside the company with previous management experience and fast-track them to be assistant managers. Since Texas has such strict liquor laws, it’s a serious position, even if it doesn’t seem like it from an outside perspective.

I’m a newly-promoted Third Key Manager when we get our new MIT. She’s in her mid- to late forties and has been a store manager of a home goods store for years before coming to us. She started in November, and now it’s mid-February.

Despite her experience, she’s been difficult to work with and doesn’t seem to be really retaining any information. I personally have had to walk her through the simplest procedures multiple times, not to mention the times our assistant manager and store manager have shown her the same things.

One morning, while I’m counting the highly stolen liquors in the store to confirm that nothing has been stolen in a week, she comes up to me.

MIT: “I’ve got a customer that needs a keg for Friday, but they want to pay for it now. Can we do that?”

Some of our smaller stores have people prepay for kegs because they have small beer coolers and can’t keep a lot of kegs on hand. Making people prepay makes sure the keg isn’t just left there. We’re a big store, though, and have a separate cooler just for kegs, so this is a weird request.

Me: “Wait, is the customer on the phone, or are they here in person?”

Only our main location can take payments over the phone.

MIT: “No, they’re here right now. We have three half kegs of [Beer], so they just want to pay now, since they’re here.”

Me: “I mean, since they’re here, they can pay now if they really want.”

MIT: “Okay! I’ll ring them up, then!”

A few hours pass and I finish up doing my counts when my MIT comes up to me again.

MIT: “So, you know how I sold that keg because I thought we had three of them in the cooler?”

Me: *Already with a sinking feeling* “Yeah, what about it? You checked to make sure that all three kegs weren’t already claimed, right?”

MIT: “Well, we don’t actually have any of the kegs that they want.”

Me: “What do you mean, we don’t have the kegs? Didn’t you double-check? You know that the inventory for kegs is always off and needs to be physically checked!”

I have personally informed her of this at least three different times, and I couldn’t tell you how many times other people have told her this, as well.

MIT: “It’s no big deal, right? We get keg deliveries on Thursday!”

We do NOT get [Beer] kegs in on Thursdays; we get them in on Fridays. So, when the customer showed up at 10:00 am for the keg — FOR HIS GRANDDAUGHTER’S WEDDING — guess who got screamed at for nearly twenty minutes before they fixed it by sending them to another store to pick up their keg and working magic to make sure neither store’s inventory was messed up in the process? Yeah, NOT the MIT!

The keg delivery came in less than an hour after the customers left.

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