Drink Responsibly, Work Less So

, , , , | Working | February 19, 2020

Years ago, I worked in the liquor department of a national chain and the assistant manager called me on my day off to see if I could work.

“Nope,” I said gleefully. “I’m on my third beer; you know the law.” He grumbled, but he understood.

The next day, I was talking to one of the non-liquor clerks and told her about it. Her face lit up and she said, “That’s great! I’m using that the next time they call me!”

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An Absolut Idiot

, , , | Right | February 15, 2020

(I work in a liquor store on a boat that sails between Sweden and Finland. The customer in this story is Swedish.)

Customer: “Do you have Swedish alcohol?”

Me: “Certainly. What are you looking for?”

Customer: “Swedish alcohol.”

Me: “Ah, yes, but what kind of product are you looking for, more specifically? Spirits? Schnapps? Beer?”

Customer: “It has to be Swedish.”

Me: “But—”

Customer: “From Sweden.”

Me: *screaming inwardly* “Let’s go look at our selection…”

(After showing him a range of assorted Swedish brands, I return to my till. Ten minutes later, I see the customer paying for a large bottle of vodka, named after its country of origin — which is not Sweden.)

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Hopefully, Wine Isn’t The Reason She Has Them To Begin With

, , | Right | February 10, 2020

(I work for a government-run alcohol store in Finland that has a monopoly to sell alcohol here. Finnish law says that if you look under 30 years old and are buying age-restricted items like alcohol or cigarettes, the cashier is required to ask ID. One evening, I am at the register and have a customer who is buying a bottle of wine. To me, she looks under 30 so I ask for ID.)

Me: “Can I see your ID?”

Customer: “Excuse me?”

Me: “May I see your ID, please?”

Customer: “But I have these here.” *pointing to her two children in stroller*

Me: “Yeah, but I still need to see ID.”

Customer: “But I don’t have ID with me.”

Me: “Then I can’t sell this to you.”

Customer: “Why?”

Me: “Because you look under thirty and don’t have ID with you to prove your age.”

Customer: “But I have these!” *again pointing at her children*

Me: “Children are not an acceptable form of ID, you know?”

(After a while, the customer left without her wine.)

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Customers You Will Always Remember

, , , , | Right | January 8, 2020

(I am working the register at a large liquor store when a woman with a few items in her cart comes up. I give my standard greeting and start ringing up her items.)

Customer: “Do you guys have any deals going on?”

Me: “Yes, they’re all either marked with large signs on the endcaps or with hanging tags in the aisles.”

Customer: “Can’t you just tell me what they are?”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but I don’t have all the sale items memorized.”

Customer: “What are you, new? I work retail, too, and I know my whole store’s inventory and all the sales.”

Me: *in my head* “Well, la-di-fricken-da, good for you!” *out loud* “Well, that’s very impressive, ma’am, but we have over 1000 SKUs, 100 of them or more can be on sale at any time, and the sales change weekly.”

Customer: “That’s no excuse for not knowing your products!”

Me: “I’m very sorry that I can’t help you, but even most of the managers here don’t know everything item or everything that’s on sale every week. Is there anything else I can help you with?”

Customer: “Learn your sales!” *storms out of the store*

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Unfiltered Story #180388

, , | Unfiltered | December 21, 2019

I work in a small liquor store where all of the small sized bottles are behind the counter and the larger bottles are in kept in the aisles where customers can easily access them.

Me: Hello, how are you?

Customer: Tired.

Me: I’m sorry to hear that, what would you like tonight sir?

Customer: Just give me a small Jack Daniels (rude tone)

Me: The pint sir? (only “small” size we carry)

Customer: I guess, how much is it?

Me: 16.99 plus tax.

Customer: Well how much is the fifth? ( still with a very nasty tone)

Me: 25.99 plus tax sir (still cheerful)

Customer: so REALLY 26.00

Me: Basically.

Customer: Just give me that.

Me: Okay sir it is going to be in the left aisle on the left hand side. (pointing)

Customer: You mean i actually have to go get it?

I should note here that i keep small .99 cent mini bottles on the counter and people have tried to pocket them if i turn my back. This man isn’t elderly or disabled.

Me: Yes sir it is only about 20 ft down the aisle. (my voice is flat now, losing patience)

Customer: Really? (confused tone)

I go through this once a week with this guy. He always has an attitude and I would normally grab the guy his bottle but his tone is always so rude and he is one of those who throws the money on the counter when my hand is extended. Respect is earned not just given.