Wireless, Clueless, Hopeless, Part 44

, , , , | Right | CREDIT: msgbubba | August 3, 2021

A few years ago, I was working as tech support for a security system company.

Me: “Tech support, this is [My Name]. How can I help?”

Customer: “I was just looking to get help with setting up my cameras.”

Me: “I would definitely be happy to help. First, you are going to need to go to the camera and press and hold the WPS button until the LED is flashing blue.”

Customer: “Okay, the little light is flashing.”

Me: “Okay. Now I need you to go to your router and press and hold the button for three seconds.”

Customer: “My what?”

Me: “Your router — it’s the box for your Internet.”

Customer: “But I ordered the Wi-Fi.”

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Customer: “I ordered the Wi-Fi; this system was supposed to have Wi-Fi.”

Me: *Facepalm* “Yes, the system is Wi-Fi capable, but you need to have Internet for it to work.”

Customer: “But is supposed to have Wi-Fi; that’s what I paid for.”

We go back and forth like this for a few minutes

Me: “Ma’am, you will need to get Internet for the cameras to work.”

Customer: “Then I just want to send them back.”

Me: “Sure thing. I will mail you a return label and you can send them back in the same box.”

Customer: “And could you cancel the Wi-Fi?”

Me: *Facepalm* “Yes, I’ll cancel the Wi-Fi.”

Customer: “Thank you.” *Click*

Me: *Long sigh*

Related:
Wireless, Clueless, Hopeless, Part 43
Wireless, Clueless, Hopeless, Part 42
Wireless, Clueless, Hopeless, Part 41
Wireless, Clueless, Hopeless, Part 40
Wireless, Clueless, Hopeless, Part 39

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His Sexism Is Making Him Deaf

, , , , | Right | August 2, 2021

I work as a tech support rep. I am one of the more tenured people at this center, and other reps often come to me for help. I know what I am doing, but I have the unfortunate affliction of being female.

Me: “Your ticket has been closed. Your issue is a known issue. There is no estimated time of resolution, but we have enough reports that this is regarded as an ongoing issue and our backend teams will continue to work on it.”

Customer: “Okay, but I’d like to hear it from a tech.”

Me: “Sir, I am a tech.”

Customer: “Yes, but I want to hear it from a tech.”

Me: “Sir, I am a tech support representative. You are speaking to a tech.”

Customer: “Well, I just want to hear it from a tech.”

Me: “I. AM. A. TECH. You want to speak to a tech, and you are currently speaking to a tech, which is me.”

Customer: “I just want to hear it from a tech!”

Me: *Giving up* “Fine. I’ll have someone call you.”

I turn to a male coworker.

Me: “[Coworker], can you call this guy? I don’t want to make it sound like I’m being a drama queen, but he wants to hear it from a male. He keeps asking for a tech and refuses to believe I am one.”

Later:

Coworker: “Yeah, you were right. He was sexist.”

There’s no funny ending, no comeuppance. It’s just another story about the often-infuriating experience of someone assuming I don’t know anything because I’m a woman.

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Not Even A Remote Chance Of That Working

, , , | Right | CREDIT: DeciduousEmu | July 31, 2021

I get a tech support call from a remote sales rep.

Me: “IT, how can I help you?”

Sales Representative: “I haven’t been able to get email for a couple of days now on my laptop.”

Me: “Okay, I’ll start a remote session. Accept the prompt when it pops up.”

Sales Representative: “I don’t have my laptop right now. It’s in the trunk of my car.”

Me: “Well, go get it.”

Sales Representative: “I can’t. I’m driving down the interstate. Can’t you remotely start the laptop and fix it for me?”

Me: *Long pause* “No. We can’t do that. You need to be on your laptop, logged in, and connected to the VPN for us to provide any assistance. Drive safe.”

I hung up and pondered how this sales rep can even function as an independent adult.

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When It’s Just Not App-ening

, , , | Right | July 30, 2021

I work IT for a retail company.

Caller: “When I download the app, it says I need to trust it.”

Me: “Yes, when you first download it, you have to trust it to be able to sign in. This is a [Company]-specific app, so technically, the developer is untrusted.”

Caller: “So, what do I do?”

Me: “On your phone, go to Settings, General, [Company], [Company Certificate], and then when you click on that, it’ll give you an option to trust it.”

Caller: “My phone is saying not to trust it, so what do I do?”

Me: “You have to trust it.”

Caller: “But my phone says not to. Do I have to trust it?”

Me: “If you want to be able to use the app.”

Caller: “Well, my phone says not to.”

Me: “Yes, it might, because the app was developed [Company]-side, so technically, it’s not trusted because it’s not a known developer. It’s a safe app; you just have to tell your phone that, which is why you have to trust it.”

Caller: “But my phone says not to.”

Me: *Head-desk* “I understand that, but in order to use the app, you have to trust it.”

Caller: “Well, are you sure?”

Me: “Yes.”

Caller: “Okay, I trusted it. Now it’s not going to delete stuff, is it?”

Me: “Um… well, not unless you tell it to?”

Caller: “No, I have storage on my phone like pictures and stuff, and this isn’t going to take that space, is it?”

Me: “Well, it’s going to take some space because it’s an app that needs to store data, but it’s not going to delete things.”

Caller: “So, it won’t delete my pictures?”

Me: “If the phone runs into storage issues, it should let you know and request that you move or delete things. But the app will not randomly start deleting your pictures.”

Caller: “Are you sure? And since I trusted it, it’s not going to steal my contacts, is it?”

Me: “Um, no.”

Caller: “I’m sorry to keep asking, but it’s just that fifteen years ago, someone hacked payroll and got all our information and I’m nervous about them getting stuff from my phone.” 

I am thinking, “Well, this isn’t fifteen years ago, and this has nothing to do with payroll, and how does that equate to deleting your pictures?”

Me: “No, this won’t steal your information.”

Caller: “Are you sure I have to trust it? And is it going to take up storage space?”

Me: “If you want to use the app, you need to keep it trusted. There will be some storage space used, yes.”

Caller: “Well, I pay for storage each month, so what happens if I go over with this?”

Me: “You might have to pay for extra space at that point, then, which you might be able to get reimbursed, but that’s something you’d have to clear with your manager. Or you can talk to your manager to see if you can get a [Company] iPad or cell phone.”

Caller: “I can get a company-owned device? I didn’t know that was an option!”

Me: “Well, it has to go through your manager and there has to be a valid business use case for it, but you’d have to talk to them.”

Caller: “I didn’t know we had company phones.”

Me: “They’re not handed out to everyone and it is still on a case-by-case basis that has to go through your manager.”

Caller: “So, I have to talk to my manager?”

Me: “If you want to see about getting a company phone. You do have the app installed on your current phone so you’ll be able to use it.”

Caller: “It won’t delete my info, will it?”

Me: “No.”

User: “Well, I guess I’ll go check in with my manager. Have a good night!”

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This Is Literally Rule Number One Of The Internet

, , , , | Working | July 30, 2021

I work in IT for a retail company. I’ve been recently helping support some of our backend retail systems, so I’ve been doing more tickets and queue work than being on the phones.

One thing that we stress through the company is to NEVER SHARE YOUR PASSWORD. Unfortunately, that doesn’t stop people from doing it, and when we find out about it, there’s paperwork and resetting and frustration because users don’t understand why security is reaching out to lecture them.

I get a ticket for an issue with a system; it’s actually a known break that is actively being worked on.

User: “I can’t sign into [System]. It keeps telling me my credentials are incorrect even though I know they’re correct. My username is [Username] and here’s my password: [password].”

I actually stare at the ticket for a minute, trying to see if I am reading what I think I am reading. Then, I burst out laughing in our team meeting. I have to explain what has me laughing, which gets everyone else going.

Coworker #1: “Oh, come on. You’ll need to create a second ticket without the password and then send a request to security to get the initial incident removed from the system. Then let the user know they’ll need to reset their password. If they say no or don’t respond, just go expire it.”

I send a message to the user through our chat system.

Me: “Hi! I wanted to reach out regarding your incident [incident]. You included your password in the incident, which is a security violation. You’ll need to reset your password immediately.”

User: “Hi, [My Name]. I included it because I wanted to know if there was a reason why I am having so much trouble getting into [System]. But noted!”

Me: “Please don’t share your password with anyone or in incidents; for security reasons this is not allowed. There is an issue with [System] currently that this is related to. A new incident was created for your initial report as the security team will need to delete the original one. You will still need to change your password.”

User: “Okay, thanks!”

The number of people who willingly want to share their passwords scares me, honestly. I’ve had a couple of times where I’ve been tempted to use their password to do something (non-malicious and reversible) just to prove the point of why we don’t share passwords.

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