Must Have Been Red-Driving Hood

, , , , | Related | September 21, 2017

(In the drive-thru, we offer free, expired, plain doughnut holes to customers for their dogs. Often they are quite tough, as they are old. Note: a fresh doughnut hole only costs $.25.)

Customer: “Could I grab a doughnut hole for my dog?”

Me: “Sure thing.”

(He then gave the crusty doughnut hole to his elderly grandmother in the passenger seat and drove off.)

You’re Not Motivating Us To Help You Faster

, , , , | Right | September 21, 2017

(A car drives straight through our drive-thru without stopping at the order box. Keep in mind that we are timed for how fast we get cars through at the window. Once the customer is at the window:)

Customer: “Give me a small black, a turkey club, and two fruit explosion muffins.”

Me: “Certainly. But sir, I will ask that you please place your order at the order box on your future visits. It helps us ensure that you are not waiting in the drive-thru very long, and that we are able to get you through quicker.”

Customer: “That’s okay; I find this way helps you move faster.”

They Need A Rude Awakening

, , , | Right | September 21, 2017

(We have a two-lane drive-thru, so one lane has to cut off the other lane when driving through. I have just finished taking one lane’s order, and they begin to pull forward when they stop half-way, blocking the other lane’s path. A pedestrian walks up to the car and begins chatting to them. Soon, a line forms in both lanes, and cars are honking. It’s been several minutes, when I finally get onto the microphone and tell the car to pull forward as they are blocking traffic. At the window:)

Customer: “You really should be more considerate! It was really rude for you to tell me to move. And tell the cars behind me that they shouldn’t have honked at me!”

Me: *stunned*

That Joke Is More Than A Little Rough Around The Edges

, , , , | Right | September 19, 2017

(I work at a fast food coffee chain in Canada. Our coffee chain has gift cards that you can reload and swipe to pay. A customer is having trouble getting his to register, and on the third try, he yanks it roughly and it reads the card.)

Me: “Oh, hey! There you go; you got it!”

Customer: “Yep. It’s like a woman, you gotta be rough with it.”

Me: *long, stunned pause*

Customer: “Haha, just kidding!”

(My coworker and I are both women.)

¡Yo No Trabajo Aquí!

, , | Right | September 18, 2017

(I’m standing in line at a popular fast-food joint, in no way looking like a worker. I’m wearing capris, a t-shirt, and sneakers. I’m also fifteen, though I look like I’m twelve. Needless to say, I’m also standing on the side of the counter where the food is ordered, not where the workers are. A customer approaches me and begins to rattle off a long, complex order.)

Customer: “Did you get all that?”

Me: *doesn’t realize she was speaking to me* “Uh… no?”


Me: “I don’t work here.”

Customer: *pause* “…get me your supervisor.”

Me: “I don’t think you understand; I’m a customer, not a worker.”

Customer: “I need to talk to your manager. If they hire Mexican children, they should at least speak English!”

Me: “I don’t think you understand English. I. Don’t. Work. Here.” *at this point, I’ve given up being polite*

Customer: “Oh… I’m sorry.”

Me: “It’s cool.”

Customer: “So… can I get a burger?”

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