Be Very Under-Weary

, , , , , | Right | February 15, 2019

(I work at a well-known UK department store in the menswear department. A customer comes to my desk clutching a pack of underpants, and it is immediately obvious that every single pair has been worn.)

Customer: “I’d like to return these.”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but we cannot exchange or refund underwear unless the packaging is intact.”

Customer: “What? Why?!”

Me: “It’s for hygiene reasons.”

Customer: “That’s ridiculous. I haven’t even worn these!”

(I know he is lying because the packet is open, and all of the underwear that would have been neatly folded inside when he bought them are messily shoved back into the packaging. There is also an overwhelming scent of strong laundry detergent.)

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but without the packaging and hygiene seal intact, I cannot refund or exchange this purchase. It does state this on your receipt, and you would have been informed of this when you bought them.”

(He demands to speak to a manager, who tells him exactly the same thing as I did until he leaves in a huff. I speak to my manager afterward about how ridiculous it is that people would be so disgusting as to try and return used underwear.)

Manager: “Well, at least he washed them before bringing them back. You’d be amazed by the number of people who bring in dirty ones to exchange.”

Trying To Motion That You Can’t Find The Lotion

, , | Right | February 15, 2019

(A woman approaches my coworker, but stops when she’s about fifteen feet away. He’s looking down at his inventory list and doesn’t realize she’s speaking to him right away.)

Customer: “Calamine lotion.” *pauses just a second* “Calamine lotion.”

Coworker: “Sorry, ma’am? Could you repeat that?”

Customer: *screaming* “CALAMINE LOTION!”

Coworker: “Sure, I just have to look up where that is in the store.” *starts to type it in on our store tablets*

Customer: “Ugh! I’ll find it MYSELF!”

(She just stormed off. We had a laugh about it afterward; I’m guessing she had one h*** of a rash!)

You Can’t Be Helped From Your Bottom To Your Top

, , | Right | February 14, 2019

(I am working in a different department than my usual one. It is a busy day, we have stock to put away, and one of the managers wants a few of us to move a few things around within the department. We are all busy working. A customer is shopping with his wife.)

Customer: *sighs, then shouts* “IS ANYONE GOING TO HELP ME?!”

Coworker: “Hi there. How can I help you today?”

Customer: “I need help finding a shirt to match these pants.”

(All of us stop what we are doing, and for about ten minutes, we help the other coworker find different options to pair with the pants. We probably find about ten different shirts. My coworker takes them up to the customer. The customer stands there going through everything.)

Customer: “No, no, no. Ugh, I guess I could try this one… No, no, no.”

(He picks all of the ones he wants to try and heads to the fitting room. I set him up in there with everything nicely folded on the bench. My manager then comes by and explains to us what he wants us to move and how he wanted us to set it all up. Meanwhile, the customer comes out of the fitting room with one of the shirts and the pants. All of my coworkers walk away and so does the manager. He proceeds to bring the items to the register.)

Me: “Hi there. How did everything go? I see you found something to pair with those pants. Are you ready to go or did you want to look around some more?”

Customer: *in a really rude voice* “I’m ready to go.”

Me: “Perfect.” *rings up all of the items* “It comes to $155; how would you like to pay?”

(The customer slides the chip into the machine while I fold and bag his clothes for him.)

Customer: “You know, I’m absolutely disgusted with the service here… I needed help and had to shout for it, and then you all were just standing around talking while I was trying things on.”

Me: “I’m sorry that you feel that way, sir.”

Customer: “It’s just disgusting. I expect better service from [Store]. You’re getting paid to be here; you should be working, not talking.”

Me: *losing my patience a bit* “Sir, we are just doing our job. There is a lot more to our job description aside from customer service, but all of us spent ten minutes looking for shirts for you to match those pants. We did our best.”

Customer: “I’m so disgusted. If your manager was here, I would love to tell him how you were all just standing around talking.”

Me: “Well, actually, our manager was standing there with us; again, we were discussing what needed to be moved around in the department, which is also in our job description, but if you would like me to call the manager down here, I can get him to explain it to you, as well.”

Customer: “No.”

(The customer gave me a dirty look, ripped the bag from my hand, and walked out of the store. I went into the fitting room to find every single shirt crumpled up in a ball on the floor.)

The Gift Card That Keeps On Taking

, , , , , , | Working | February 13, 2019

(I purchase two items at a department store, but the next day I decide I should really be saving money and decide to return them. On the day of my purchase:)

Me: “Just these two, please.”

Employee #1: “Because you’re spending $200, you get a $50 gift card to use at a later date!”

Me: “Okay, great. Thanks.”

(The next day, when I decide to go back and return my items:)

Me: “Hello, I’d like to return these two items I purchased yesterday.”

Employee #2: “Absolutely, let me help you with that. Okay, so, it looks like you’ll be getting $150 back.

Me: “Wait, what? I spent $200!”

Employee #2: “Oh, well, it says they gave you a $50 gift card for the future, so you get to keep that, and then the return is the remaining $150.”

Me: “What? No. I don’t want the gift card. Here, it is in the bag with the item. Take the gift card back and give me my $200 back!”

Employee #2: “We can’t refund the gift card.”

Me: “WHAT?!”

Employee #2: “Don’t worry! You still have the $50 to use in the future at any stores or online.”

Me: “I don’t want the $50 gift card. I want my money back!”

Employee #2: “Well, we don’t do that, so it is not an option.”

(We went in a circle for almost fifteen minutes until I stormed out and called corporate. They seemed perplexed by the employee’s behavior and told me they were going to refund me and to just go ahead and keep the items. All’s well that ends well, I guess.)

Stop! Or We’ll Stare Disapprovingly!

, , , , , , | Working | February 7, 2019

(We’re going through a busy spell at self-check, so my coworker and I manning the area are both running back and forth between customers while trying to keep an eye on all of them to prevent theft. Two men at a register have one item, but it’s from electronics and has an anti-theft tag, which they flag me down to remove. The policy is to remove it after they have asked and you see that it’s scanned. If they ask before they pay, you’re not supposed to argue or make them wait, just remove the tag as long as it’s been scanned. I have to help another customer, but the men have been at the register a while, and since I just finished helping that customer and my coworker is busy with a different customer, I go to check on them. Just as I get there…)

Me: “Is everything–”

Customer #1: *storms off, completely ignoring me*

Customer #2: *sheepishly smiles at me and starts to follow his friend*

(I look down and see their item still sitting on the bagging platform. Before I can do anything:)

Customer #1: *abruptly turns around, snatches the item off the platform, and storms back off*

Me: “Have a nice day?”

(As I say this, I’m glancing towards the register, having found it very odd that they would only purchase one item and then almost forget to take it. Sure enough, there’s a message on the card reader showing that their card was declined a couple times. I rush after them. As a cashier, I’m not allowed to go after customers myself.)

Me: “Security, that really tall guy by the door: theft!”

(Even though we’re a high-crime area, I guess due to violent reactions, security cannot actually detain anybody, nor can they follow them outside. All they can do is ask somebody to stop and see their receipt or turn over an item. The two men are almost to the door, so I am rushing, trying to get the guard to move quickly before they leave and there’s nothing more we can do.)

Security: *slowly scanning* “Those two?”

Me: “Yes, yes, the tall man in the brown jacket with the short man in the gray sweatshirt.”

Security: *finally starts after them, then quietly asks* “Sir? Sir, please?”

Customer #1: *continues walking at brusque pace and pays the guard absolutely no attention, walking right out of the store, his friend right behind him*

Security: *turns back to me and shrugs*

Me: “…”

(I just walk back to self-checkout. I’ve only been working a month or so and have not dealt with blatant theft like that before, so I catch my coworker, who is regularly stationed at self-check, tell her what happened, and ask what to do. She comes over to look at the register they left, which, fortunately, other customers have left alone.)

Coworker: “That’s a hundred-dollar item!”

Me: “I know; it sucks.”

Coworker: “And they just walked off with it… D***.”

(She printed out a receipt of the transaction thus far so she could take it to down to customer service where there’s usually a manager and give it to them to log. I later made sure to confirm with a manager that we couldn’t wait until after a transaction was finished to take off anti-theft tags if asked. I explained why I was asking, and the manager just shrugged and told me, yeah, remove the tag when asked. It just needs to be scanned first. I don’t particularly care because it’s a huge corporate business that pays their employees dirt, but it’s kind of a silly policy, though no more so than our security guards being there just for show.)

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