Can We Just Look Around And Ruin Your Evening?

, , , | | Right | August 22, 2019

(I’m the last one to leave after closing. As I’m locking the front door behind me on my way out, a middle-aged couple approaches. The store is completely dark, the “closed” sign is up on the door, and there is no one left inside.)

Customer: “Oh, are you closed?”

Me: “Yes, we closed about twenty minutes ago.”

Customer: “Can we just come in and look around for a few minutes?” 

Me: “Unfortunately, that’s not possible; we’ve already shut down the registers.”

Customer: “We aren’t looking to buy anything! We just want to look around!”

Me: “We’re closed. I can’t let you in. I need to leave now. I have somewhere to be.”

(They continued to stand there, staring at the door, as I walked away. I kept an eye on them as I got into my car, and saw them try the door once or twice, then look at the hours sign next to the door, and then look at their phones before finally walking away. I made sure that they were long gone before I drove away.)

Yanya, Meet Janya

, , , , | | Right | August 22, 2019

Me: “Can I have your name, please?”

Caller: “Tanya.”

Me: “Is that Tanya with a Y, or Tanja with a J?”

Caller: “Tanya with a T.”

He’s Ring Out Of Luck

, , , | | Right | August 21, 2019

(I’m working the closing shift on a Sunday night. Sunday nights are usually dead since we are located out in the middle of nowhere, and all but one of the tills have been pulled at this point. My coworker is running the cash and there is a line of three people while I straighten up items in the cosmetics area. All of a sudden, a man comes up to the cosmetics counter and snaps his fingers at me as if I were a dog.)

Customer: “Hey, I need some help over here!”

(I fume silently, as I despise customers who act like this. I try to be polite, anyway, as we’ve had a change in management and frankly, the new store manager is an a** who fires people for nothing and I’m trying to stay on his good side until I find a new job.) 

Me: “Yes, sir, how can I help you?”

Customer: “I need you to ring me up; the line is too long.” *gestures to the line that has dwindled down to two people*

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but the front register is the only one with a till in it, so you’ll have to check out over there.”

(I smile politely and turn to go back to straightening up when I hear him scoff behind me.)

Customer: *leans towards me, trying to look threatening* “You’ve got to be kidding me! I guess I’ll have to put all of this stuff back, then, and go to a twenty-four-hour store, because I’m not waiting in line.”

Me: “I’m sorry about that, sir. If you’ll leave everything on the counter, I can go put it back for you.”

Customer: “Excuse me? I don’t think you understand.” *suddenly gives me a smug look as he throws his credit card on the counter* “I’m not going to another [Store].” 

(He doesn’t say anything after this and just continues to smile at me smugly. I’m honestly baffled at this point and just want to get back to straightening the area up so I can go home.)

Me: “Um… Okay? Well, let me know if you need help with anything else, then, because like I said, the front register is the only one working right now.”

(I quickly walk to the other end of the store to find a different area to fix and forget about the guy until the store closes and everyone is getting ready to leave. He is standing outside of the locked doors with his arms crossed, just glaring at us as we are getting ready to walk outside. He weirds my manager out enough that she calls the cops on him when she asks him to leave and he won’t. His reasoning?)

Customer: *pointing at me* “That b**** refused me service and I’m not leaving without my stuff!”

(Eventually, the cops came and convinced him to get lost. I actually got written up later for “refusing” the guy service, despite my many protests, and have since found a better job.)

Some Holes Aren’t Meant To Be Filled

, , , | | Right | August 21, 2019

(I overhear a conversation between a guy holding a box of donuts and the cashier. The customer brings the donuts to the counter.)

Customer: “Do you sell donut holes?”

Cashier: “I don’t think so. [Bakery] is a couple of blocks away; you should have better luck there.”

Customer: “Thanks. Do you sell any non-toxic glue?”

Cashier: “I know what you’re planning and let me tell you from experience: it isn’t going to work.”

Customer: *crestfallen* “Oh… I’ll just have these, then, please.”

(It took everything I had in me not to burst out laughing right there!)

Brushing Away The Sale

, , , , | | Right | August 21, 2019

(I work at an arts and crafts store that’s part of a national chain. I’m a cashier, not a manager or a supervisor. I’m walking through the store when a customer gets my attention.)

Customer: “Excuse me. These brushes are $24.99 this week, when last week they were only $12.49. Why is that?”

Me: “They must have been on sale last week. But it’s a regular sale, so they’ll be back on sale in a few weeks.”

Customer: “When, exactly?”

Me: “I’m not sure. It happens about once a month or so. But they don’t tell us when exactly it’s going to happen, sorry.”

Customer: “That’s a horrible business model.”

(I happened to agree, but all I could give her was a shrug. I don’t know why she thought complaining to a part-time, minimum-wage employee was going to convince the entire corporation to change its business model.)