Oreover And Over And Over

, , | Right | April 18, 2018

(I work stocking at a grocery store.)

Customer: “Where are those new Oreos?”

Me: “The Winter Oreos or the White Fudge?”

Customer: “Not those…The round ones with cream filling.”

Me: “Sir, all of our Oreos are round with cream filling.”

Customer: “Not those… The oblong kind with cream in the middle.”

Me: “We don’t have those, sir.”

Customer: “But I saw them on TV!”

Me: “Sorry, sir. We don’t have those yet.”

Customer: “But they were on TV!”

Me: *sigh* “Well, sir. We don’t have them in our warehouse yet.”

Customer: “But I saw them on TV!”

Doesn’t Have The Power(ball) To Change

, , , , | Right | April 18, 2018

(I’m working the lottery counter at customer service. A customer comes up with a Powerball slip and when my lotto rejects it, I realize it’s an old slip.)

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but this is an old Powerball slip. They changed the game, so you’ll need to fill out a new one.”

Customer: “New slip?”

Me: “Yeah, they didn’t say anything about changing the game, but the numbers are different. There are more up top and less down bottom.”

Customer: *stares at me with a slightly irritated expression*

Me: “We have new slips right over on the counter, so all you need to do is fill out a new one.”

(The customer steps back, stomps to the side, and tears his old Powerball slip it half, tossing it onto the floor and walking away.)

Me: “Or you could do that.”

Last Year, Year Last

, , , | Right | April 18, 2018

Customer: “I have an extended warranty for my shredder here.”

Me: “Okay.” *I look at receipt* “Um, this is from 2006.”

Customer: “No, it’s from 2009.”

Me: “Nope, this is from 2006. See the date here, how it says, ‘09/01/06’? That means it was purchased on September 1, 2006.”

Customer: “No, the ‘09’ is the year. The year is listed first.”

Me: “No, the year is last.” *I grab a recently-printed receipt to show her* “See?”

Customer: “Then it must have changed.”

Me: “It didn’t change. But, either way, even if this was from 2009, it’s still too long ago; the extended warranty is only good for an extra year.”

Customer: “No! This shredder is warrantied for five years, so this gives me six years total! So, even if it was purchased in 2006, you can still use it! It’s good for six years!”

Me: “2006 was nine years ago. It’s 2015.”

Customer: “It doesn’t matter! It’s from 2009!”

Me: “Well, I’m sorry, but it’s not. It’s from 2006. I haven’t even actually seen these warranty pamphlets, and I’ve been working here for seven years.”

Customer: “Well, that’s weird, because it’s from 2009!”

Me: “I don’t know what else to tell you… because it’s from 2006.”

Customer: “I don’t know what else to tell you, either, because it’s from 2009! The year is listed first!”

Nearby Associate: “No, the year is always last. I’ve actually never seen the year listed first. Anywhere.”

You’re Sew Racist!

, , , , | Right | April 18, 2018

(The dry cleaner where I work does onsite alterations with a seamstress on duty. The various sewing machines are clearly visible from the outside.)

Customer: “Oh my! You do sewing!”

(I get this often, and it’s usually from customers confirming said fact or expressing that they are pleased that we do it. My coworker is sewing a garment now.)

Customer: “Do you have a seamstress here?”

Me: “Yes, she is right there.”

(Keep in mind that the customer has looked at her.)

Customer: *to [Coworker]* “So, you do sewing?”

Coworker: “Yes, ma’am, all types.”

Customer: “Where are you from?”

Coworker: “Poland. I immigrated 30 years ago!”

Customer: “Well, are you sure you can handle simple tasks?”

Coworker: *looks at me, unsure what to do*

Me: *getting angry* “Ma’am, her birth country has nothing to do with her exemplary sewing skills.”

Customer: “There is no reason for you to get nasty with me.”

Me: “Ma’am, there is no reason to question her abilities based on her country of origin.”

Customer: “Well! I am new to the area and wanted to find a dry cleaner, but I see I will not be using this one!

Me & Coworker: *almost at the same time* “That’s fine!”

Very Closed Minded

, , | Right | April 18, 2018

(My friend and I both work in gastro-service in this town. We spend the evening at another local cafe. When we finish up, we notice we’re the last customers left, so we decide to pay quickly as we know how annoying it can be to wait around for just two customers.)

Me: *paying at the till* “By the way, when do you guys close?”

Server: “Oh, at 9:00 pm, so not for another two hours.”

My Friend: “Oh, good! We thought we’d already overstayed the closing time and you were just waiting for us to finally get out.” *laughs*

Server: “Oh, no, we would never do that! It’s fine for guests to stay longer; we’d just have to start cleaning up around other parts of the cafe.”

Me: “Sure, but it’s still bothersome to have people who just won’t leave.”

Server: “It’s fine, really. We’ve got a lot of things to get done; we wouldn’t throw anyone out just because it’s closing time.”

Me: “Listen, we both work in gastro-service, too. We know how it feels.”

Server: “Oh! Oh, thank God. I couldn’t think of another nice way to answer this without sounding patronising.”

(We stayed for another half-hour, chatting about our work and the troubles you sometimes get with customers. The server seemed really relieved we weren’t going to make any trouble.)

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