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A Prime Reason To Just Let Them Stick To Their Worldview

, , , , , | Right | February 6, 2023

A customer comes in looking at a Nikon DSLR camera.

Me: “Hi! Do you have any questions, sir?”

He asks a couple of generic questions while looking at his iPad.

Customer: “Hmm… On Amazon, I can get an extra lens for $100.”

Manager: “We can match the price for you in-store.”

Customer: “Hmm… I think I would prefer to purchase it from Amazon because it’s free shipping.”

My manager and I look at each other.

Manager: “But… you could get it here. Now. For the same price.”

He gives us a dirty look.

Customer: “I don’t want any more help.”

Manager: “Well then, have a nice day, sir.”

As we walk away my, manager whispers to me:

Manager: “Never doubt the stupidity of the average consumer.”

There Are Two Kinds Of Customers… But Still Only Five Nuggets

, , , | Right | February 6, 2023

I used to work at a popular fast food chain. During orientation, I was told that at some point, I would be asked, “How many nuggets are in the five-piece?”

Sure enough, it happened twice.

The first time:

Customer #1: “How many nuggets are in the five-piece?”

Me: “Can you repeat that question, please?”

Customer #1: “How many nuggets are in the five… piece… Oh.”

As she heard herself, she hung her head.

Customer #1: “I’m so sorry. I’m exhausted.”

Fair enough; we all have those days!

The second time:

Customer #2: “How many nuggets are in the five-piece?”

Me: “Can you repeat that question, please?”

Customer #2: *Loudly and angrily* “I said, how… many… nuggets… are… in… the… five-piece?!”

Should I have told him there were four pieces?

Can’t Hear You Over The Sound Of Your Ovaries, Part 26

, , , , , | Right | February 6, 2023

Customer: “Can I speak to a man?”

Me: “I can help you with your query, sir.”

Customer: “No, I need a man. A woman wouldn’t understand.”

Me: “If I’m not the one to help you, then I can find someone who can.”

Customer: “I need to talk about things that were invented by men, so women wouldn’t understand.”

Me: “So, you’re saying men can only understand things invented by men? Does that mean women can only understand things made by women?”

Customer: “That’s right.”

Me: “Well then, I have some bad news for you, sir, since that means you shouldn’t know anything about circular saws, life rafts, fire escapes, coffee filters, windshield wipers, Wi-Fi, and space rocket propulsion systems!”

Can’t Hear You Over The Sound Of Your Ovaries, Part 25
Can’t Hear You Over The Sound Of Your Ovaries, Part 24
Can’t Hear You Over The Sound Of Your Ovaries, Part 23
Can’t Hear You Over The Sound Of Your Ovaries, Part 22
Can’t Hear You Over The Sound Of Your Ovaries, Part 21

Just Let Me Be Angry!

, , , , | Romantic | February 6, 2023

I have been dating my current girlfriend for about a year and a half. I consider myself to be pretty generous and thoughtful, but I’m not really a person who likes to gift flowers. I’ve gifted a few potted plants, but cut flowers? I just don’t like how they slowly die and wilt over the next few days, and then they just leave a mess.

My girlfriend did ask for flowers for Valentine’s Day, which I gave her, and she was happy.

However, at some point later, she is in a bad mood and decides that once is not enough for eighteen months of dating. We don’t live with each other.

I’m going about my day when I get a text from her.

Girlfriend: “We’ve been dating for over a year and you’ve only ever given me flowers once! Once!”

Me: “You’re right; I’m so inconsiderate. All I’ve ever given you is jewelry, fuel for your car, clothes, trips to restaurants, lots of homemade food, vacations to California and New York, and a $1,500 wig.”

Girlfriend: “This was supposed to make you look bad, but it ended up making me look bad!”

Me: “Yep.”

It’s A Pain To Be Poor

, , , , , , , , | Related | February 6, 2023

It has long been a complaint of service workers everywhere. A bad job plus no sick pay equals coming to work sick! That gets the spotlight often enough that some semblance of awareness circulates somewhere. What doesn’t get the spotlight so much are the injuries employees suffer from and still have to work through.

We visited family in Southern California for the holidays and had a lovely time. However, when we decided to visit the mall to explore, shop, and have dinner, we encountered a very injured employee that broke my heart.

At [Pizza Cookhouse], we encountered a young lady who was bustling about to the best of her abilities but walking with a very pronounced limp. Our request for a booth was granted, as Dad explained that Mom needed one due to pain from health issues related to a car accident.

The young lady was soon in quite a conversation with Mom, and it came out that the Friday before our visit, the young lady had been in a car accident, too. The recent rains had flooded the street, and her attempt to turn a corner had resulted in a terrible accident with another car that had hydroplaned and smashed into her. Her car had been totaled, and she had been hospitalized with internal bleeding.

The fact that she was working meant that the day after she had been released from the hospital, she was back on the floor, injuries and all. She was still on antibiotics to prevent an infection from her injuries (and, no doubt, a pain pill or two).

Mom, ever the empath, gave her specific advice on ways to manage her pain.

Our server did her absolute best throughout the time we were there, and she even retrieved some bread from a nearby restaurant when the kitchen had run out. Her limp slowly became more pronounced, but she stayed friendly and positive sounding — a herculean effort if ever I saw one — the entire time we were there.

My aunt is very well-to-do and generally kind, but she has no concept of the problems endured by people who struggle to make ends meet.

She could not understand why our server had come to work while injured.

I told her that many restaurants don’t offer sick pay and that the server we had probably just couldn’t afford to take injury time off. Since her accident didn’t happen in the restaurant, the company was under no obligation to give her any sort of compensation or time off. I pointed out the names of several restaurants that were under fire for exposing their guests to sick employees due to lack of sick pay.

My aunt chided me for “thinking negatively.”

I bit my tongue until it bled in an effort to not make a scene.

She did leave a generous tip before wandering out, but I was left with the feeling that no lessons had been learned. I wished there was something more I could have done for the poor server.