Checked Out Before They Checked In

, , , | Right | October 19, 2018

(I work as a graveyard shift receptionist in a small hotel. Our hotel also has some rooms that feature a jacuzzi. This happens in winter, in which most days are quiet, but occasionally, on special days, we will have all the rooms sold out. It is Valentine’s Day and all of the rooms were occupied before my shift started. Most couples just leave when I tell them we do not have a room, while some scream at me before leaving. Then came this couple.)

Male Customer: “I need one room, with a jacuzzi.”

Me: “Sorry, sir, we are all sold out for today.”

(He pauses and pulls out his phone, then resumes.)

Male Customer: “We have a reservation!”

(All the customers with reservations are checked in, so it is impossible for him to have a reservation today. I ask him for ID to check in our system in case there is a system error; I will  need to call the website if such an error exists. It turns out his reservation was made one minute ago, and the check-in time is clearly stated there: the same day, but 12 hours later. Again I work on the graveyard shift and it is midnight.)

Me: “Sir, your check in time for the reservation is 12 hours from now. It is clearly written on the website where you reserved the room.”

(He checks his phone again.)

Male Customer: “But I need one room.”

Me: “Sorry, sir. It is Valentine’s Day and all the rooms are sold.”

Male Customer: “How much?”

(I tell him the price and repeat that all the rooms are sold.)

Male Customer: “But I need one room!”

(He pulls money out and starts to push it at me.)

Me: “Sir, we have no rooms available. All the rooms are occupied.”

(I push the money back but he pushes back with more money. This pushing game goes on for minutes. I keep telling him in many different ways that we have no rooms, in case he does not know English very well, but they both understand English.)

Male Customer: “You can have all of this! Just give me a room!”

(Suddenly I realize that he thinks I am lying for tips. We have a very strict policy against this. I show him our shelf with all the registration cards to prove that I am not lying and all rooms are occupied. Then the silent female customer joins in for the game.)

Female Customer: “Can you tell somebody to get out and give us the room? We will pay you a large tip.”

Me: “Sorry, miss, I cannot do that. They are our customers.”

Male Customer: “But I want a room with a jacuzzi! Get me the room now!”

Female Customer: “We are customers, too. Now, what are you going to do?”

Me: “Again, I am sorry. We do not have any rooms available right now. Your check in time is 12 hours from now. I can inform my coworkers to allow you check in a few hours earlier, if we have rooms at that time. You are free to call us to check.”

(I hand them our business card, but they do not even look at it.)

Female Customer: “We can check in earlier? GREAT! I will do it. I want to check in now.”

(I start running out of patience, but I still remain as polite as possible. Suddenly, the male customer starts yelling.)

Male Customer: “GET ME YOUR MANAGER!”

(Since I am the only person in the office now, I tell them that I am the manager.)

Male Customer: “THEN GIVE ME A ROOM!”

Me: “Sir, we do not have a room at this moment, and please keep your voice down; people are sleeping.”

Male Customer: “GET ME YOUR BOSS! WHO IS THE OWNER?”

(My boss has instructed me to never get him for the customer, nor give out his information. I tell him my boss is not here.)

Female Customer: “CALL HIM!”

(I am tired and I do not know what else I can do to get them to understand the situation. I call my boss. Luckily, he rarely sleeps on my shift.)

Boss: *on the phone* “Kick them out, now.”

Me: “I am sorry. My boss wants you to leave now.”

Male Customer: “Fine…”

(Just as I thought it is finally over, they backed off to the corner of the lobby and started kissing and cuddling. After many requests to leave and then threatening to call to the police, they finally left.)

Third Party Gets Third-World Slurs

, , , , | Right | October 16, 2018

(We have a lot of issues with third-party reservations at the hotel. We encourage people NOT to book with them because they’re going to screw it up one way or another eventually. This is one of those cases. The guest is not irate with me by any means; she knows the fault is with the third party, but she decides she is going to yell at this person over the phone in my lobby like it is that individual’s fault. She’s cursing and using racial slurs because most call centers with third-party agents are overseas. We have children in the lobby. So, I address her on the issue — I hate racists — very calmly because yelling back at her doesn’t do anything but make it worse.)

Guest: “I want to speak with your manager!”

Me: *points to the manager on duty sign, with my name under it*

Guest: “Well, I want to speak with corporate! Give me their number!”

Me: *gives her the number*

Guest: “You’re in for it now!”

(She gets on the phone with corporate, in front of me, on speaker as if their answer to this is going to surprise me, and of course, they call me to get my side of it. She’s getting pretty frustrated because no one seems to be on her side.)

Guest: “Look. I was referring to the incompetent people with [Website].”

Corporate: “Ma’am… a racist slur is still a racist slur, no matter who it is directed at or intended for. We at the [Hotel Corporation] cannot condone that behavior, and now your status is put up for review to revoke your membership with [Hotel Company] entirely.”

Guest: “THAT’S BULLS***! All this over me calling someone a ‘[slur]’?”

Corporate: “Ma’am… my mother is one of those [slurs] you are referring to.”

(And that’s the first time this particularly well-known hotel brand insisted that I kick someone out of the hotel. They did not have to tell me twice.)

You Have To Book In At 88 Miles Per Hour

, , | Right | October 14, 2018

(Our no-frills hotel is right next to a luxury hotel called Lorian, and so many times people come to ask about it.)

Lady: “How much for a room?” *I tell her* “Too much! Any other hotels ’round?”

Me: “Well, there’s the Lorian next door. But that’s all. And—”

Lady: “Delorean? Okay, thanks!” *leaves quickly*

(She came back, muttering.)

Scandinavian Summers Versus Bedtime

, , , | Right | October 13, 2018

(I work at a hotel in Finland. A lady with her grandkids comes to the reception desk.)

Customer: “What time do you make it dark here?”

Me: “It will get dark around 11 pm.”

Customer: “Can’t you make it earlier? The kids can’t stay up that late!”

Cooking Up All The Answers

, , , | Right | October 12, 2018

(I am a line cook in a restaurant that is inside a hotel. This exchange occurs when I am passing through another part of the hotel. I am in full uniform: chef hat, double-breasted chef coat with the hotel name and logo embroidered on it, apron, baggy pants, and chef clogs.)

Guest: “Excuse me?”

Me: “Yes, ma’am?”

Guest: “Is there a restaurant on the premises?”

Me: *trying not to look down at my uniform* “Yes, ma’am, the restaurant is on the fourth floor.”

Guest: “Oh, good! What time is breakfast?”

Me: “We open for breakfast at 6:30 am, and we have a full buffet, as well as an extensive a la carte menu.”

Guest: “Do you have eggs?”

Me: “Yes, we have eggs.”

Guest: “Pancakes? Waffles?”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, those, too.”

Guest: “Is the food any good?”

Me: “Our food is excellent. Of course, my opinion may be biased, since I am a cook in the restaurant.”

Guest: “Oh, really? I didn’t know that! Well, thank you so much!”

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