This story reminded me of something similar that happened to me.

Back in the days of my PhD, I was due to visit a manufacturer in the South of the UK: they were building special equipment for our lab and I, together with a senior researcher and the head technician, were going to visit them for a couple of weeks to ensure the equipment worked as it was meant to and to start familiarizing ourselves with it.

I took care of arranging the travel for the three of us: since our flight to London Stansted arrived past midnight and we needed to travel to East Sussex, I decided to book a lodging near the airport, spend the night there, and then travel the morning after. 

We landed at the airport and went to the shuttle pickup point, only to find nobody there to pick us up. Since it was past midnight, it was just an empty parking lot. I decided to call the lodging:

Me: “Hello, it’s [My Name]. I have a booking for three rooms with pickup at the airport, but nobody is here to pick us up.”

Lodging: “Yes, sir, I see your booking, but it’s for the next night, not for today.”

I suddenly realized that, upon booking online, I had stupidly filled in the actual date of landing as the arrival date, which, being past midnight, was the day after I was actually supposed to do the booking.

Me: “I think I messed up with the booking since we landed past midnight, but now we are at the airport and would rather not spend the night here in the cold. Do you have any room available this late?”

Lodging: “I understand, sir; it happens more often than you think. Sadly, we don’t have three free rooms at the moment; we only have a room with a twin-size bed. Would that do for you?”

I quickly explain the situation to my travel mates, and we all agree that the twin bed is better than spending the night stranded at or around the airport, so I tell the lodging that we take the room.

The shuttle bus comes to pick us up, and we get to the room. To add insult to injury, once crammed in the bed, the technician started snoring like a motorbike with a broken exhaust, and the senior researcher ended up sleeping in the bathtub to try to get some rest. 

The morning after, the technician said he had slept like a baby, while the researcher and I looked like zombies.

The lodging, at least, was kind enough to cancel our wrong booking for free and charge us only for the one room we used. After we recovered the missed sleep, we all got a good laugh out of it.

I worked for a very short time at a boutique hotel. We shared a pool with the neighboring apartment complex, which was a bit of a walk away from the hotel and required a staff keycard to access. So, every time someone wished to swim in the pool, a staff member would accompany them.

One day I check in a middle-aged businessman, and right away he starts flirting with me. I’m used to this as a young female in the service industry, but since we don’t accept tips, I do not attempt to play nice and am stone-faced in response. He asked about the pool, and I walked him over to see it. The entire way, he’s asking me very personal questions and makes sure to mention how he’s traveling alone and away from his wife (gross).

The next day he comes down and wants to go to the pool again; I assume to swim, as he has a bag. We get there, and he turns around with me. I ask why he’s not swimming, and he said he wanted to help me “get a break from work”. I politely said that this wasn’t a break and I didn’t need his assistance. Before going upstairs, he said, “Do you deliver the room service? If I ordered it, could you bring it to me?” Eww. No.

I was off the next day, and my coworker said he kept asking about me. He literally came down in swim trunks, but when he saw I wasn’t working, he turned around and went back upstairs. Then, that same night, he called down asking if I was back yet because “I had promised him I would personally bring up his room service.”

The audacity.

This is the story of an extraordinary guest I encountered about a year ago when I was managing a hotel as guest services manager.

During the fall before COVID, I had a guest who was noted as a VIP and a high-ranking loyalty member. She would be staying for two weeks.

We did our thing to make her feel welcome and gave her my card in case she needed anything. That was a mistake.

On the second day of her stay, she cornered me while I was walking down a hallway on the first floor.

Guest: “There is a lot we have to discuss.”

Me: “Okay.”

Guest: “Your breakfast chef said ‘good morning’ to me, and one of the housekeepers greeted me.”

Me: “Are those things a problem?”

Guest: “YES! I CAN’T BELIEVE IT! THESE PEOPLE ARE JUST SEEKING ATTENTION! THEY SHOULD BE SEEN AND NOT HEARD!”

I was a little flabbergasted and didn’t understand.

Me: “We have a friendly staff here, and I won’t ask them to change that.”

Guest: “Once you start allowing those things, the employees will want more and more from you. I work in training hotel staff for resorts all over the United States, and I know what I’m talking about.”

I let it slide, knowing my stuff because I grew up in the business. I wasn’t going to tell my staff to stop greeting people because a guest thought it was attention-seeking.

Fast-forward to the last day of her stay. She had mostly been minding her own business, with a few stupid notes about whatever she could think of here and there, but otherwise nothing quite as odd. She asked to sit down with me again, and she had a notepad.

She went down her notes section by section.

Guest: “The staff are still seeking attention, and the way you fold the first sheet of toilet paper is incorrect.”

Then she spoke about one of my staff members whom I saw as a future supervisor. She was cautious and shy, but she was breaking out of her shell and showing some serious skill.

Guest: “When you weren’t present, I was speaking to your associate. While she was explaining something, she was fidgeting with a pen, so I took the pen and threw it at her.”

These were all things she admitted to me.

Me: “Why did you feel at liberty to throw a pen at my associate?”

Guest: “You need to train them at a young age not to fidget and to respect their elders with their full attention when they are being spoken to.”

I didn’t let this go.

Me: “Since day one, we have been nothing but hospitable and welcoming to you, only for you to throw it back in our faces.”

She tried to interrupt me, but I kept going.

Me: “My staff do not have to put up with abuse, and I won’t tolerate anything other than you not coming back to my hotel. Telling me how to do my job and how my staff should welcome guests is not up for debate or criticism unless they were anything but welcoming.”

I escorted her out, and the last thing she said to me was:

Guest: “Sad. I thought you were one of the good ones.”

I have since moved on from the hotel due to the many issues I encountered during my time there. Before I left, my final good deed was to print multiple pictures of Bill Murray and hide them anywhere I could think of.

I am currently working security at an art museum. It is truly a job that makes me happy. I get to watch the sunset over the bay every night I work.

I have received texts from my old general manager asking:

Former General Manager: “Are you ready to come home?”

Not for a million dollars and a personal assistant.

Guest: “I got locked out of my room, it’s [Expensive Suite]. Can you let me in?”

Me: “Sure thing, ma’am. Do you have any ID?”

Guest: “No.”

Me: “How about anything at all official with your name on it? Airport luggage tag, bank card, some email showing a tour booking, anything?”

Guest: “No.”

Me: “Can I get the guest name, check-in date, check-out date, and roughly what time of day you checked in?”

Guest: “It’s in my husband’s name. Why can’t you just let me in? I paid for it!”

Me: “Sorry, ma’am, I can’t do that without being sure it’s yours. Surely, you’d understand me not wanting to let people into your room freely?”

Guest: “FINE! I’ll just go down to security like a good little girl, because that’s what you think I am! The service here is unbelievable! Your manager will hear about this!”

She was pushing sixty. Don’t pull that “Good little girl” nonsense on me!

I’m working the night audit shift when a guest calls at 11:00 pm on the day of her scheduled arrival.

Guest: “Hi, I need to cancel my reservation.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but our cancellation policy requires at least twenty-four hours’ notice. Since your reservation was for tonight, I can’t cancel it without charging you.”

Guest: “Fine. Can you change my check-in date to another day?”

Me: “No, ma’am. I can’t move the reservation just so you can cancel it afterward.”

Guest: “How do you know I’m trying to cancel?”

Me: “Because you literally just told me you were trying to cancel.”

Guest: “Okay, no worries. I’ll just call the credit card company and dispute it with them.”

Me: “Good luck.”

She did not like that answer, because then she said:

Guest: “You stupid b****!” *Click.*

Honestly, p***ing her off is going to be the highlight of my night audit shift.