Hej! Get Back Here!
My wife and I go to [Famous Swedish Furniture Store]. I’m tired after a long day at work, so I sit down on one of their chairs and guard the stuff we’ve picked out so far.
A guy grabs something from our pile of stuff and starts walking away. I follow him.
Me: “Hey! Give that back! That’s mine! Hey!”
He brings it to his wife and kids.
Customer: “The cats will love this. And look, it’s on clearance!”
Me: *Catching up to him* “Hey, my wife and I already picked that out, and I was guarding it.”
Customer: “Sorry, I thought you were some homeless person taking a nap on the chair.”
Me: “Look, can I have the laundry hamper back, please?”
Customer: “It’s a cat castle. If you’d really picked it out, you would know what it was.”
Me: “It says laundry hamper on the tag. Please, I was guarding it for my wife.”
Customer’s Wife: “Honey, just give it back to him. We can find another.”
Customer: “Fine. It’s your fault if our cats don’t get this cool cat castle.”
I didn’t even reply. I just walked back to the chair and put it back on our pile of stuff.