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Scammers Are So Not Cool

, , , , | Right | June 26, 2022

We have a receipt picking problem at the store where I work as a customer service manager. My door greeters put stickers on all items that come through the door.

A lady walks up with a tattered, beaten receipt. She wants to return a never-opened 150-dollar mini-fridge. I get called up by the cashier, and I call for asset protection to check the cameras. The lady knows she’s screwed, and she starts getting rude.

Lady: “How much longer is this gonna take? I need to go pick up my kids!”

Me: “You need to wait for our asset protection officer to get back to me. We need to know what door your fridge came in from before doing the return.”

Then, she tries to leave with the fridge in the cart.

Me: “No. This fridge is not leaving until asset protection comes back.”

Lady: “Fine. I’m going to pick up my kids from school, and then I’ll be back.”

She left the fridge and went to pick up her kids from school. On a Saturday. At 6:00 pm.

She never came back.

You Know Buttons Are Cheap, Right?

, , | Right | June 24, 2022

Customer: “I’d like to return these pants. I just bought them; they’re brand new.”

Me: “Why are you returning them?”

I need a reason to log in our system.

Customer: “They’re missing the little packet with the extra button in it!”

She went on a three-minute rant about this.

Painting Yourself To Look Like An Idiot

, , , , | Right | June 24, 2022

I work in an art store. A woman comes in looking for the biggest bottles of acryl paint we have. She buys two big bottles of our highest quality brand.

She returns a few minutes later, rudely cutting in line at my till, and smashes her purchase down on the counter, followed by two bottles of another brand.

Customer: “These look bigger and cost less! I want an exchange and a refund for the difference immediately!”

I just did it to get her out of the store. In the end, she got TWO CENTS back from me and took it with a super smug look on her face, believing she had beaten the system. She paid less, yes, but she also got less paint.

That Escalated Quickly, Part 3

, , , , | Right | June 21, 2022

When I was still new at a call center, I was still very nervous about speaking to angry customers. During my first couple of months there, I got what is still probably one of the craziest customers I’ve ever spoken to.

If customers ask for a supervisor, then we have to advise them that we do not have a supervisor available and that the escalations team has the same authority as a supervisor (they actually have more as far as what they can do for a customer) and get them to accept speaking with them.

Also, any time we have to contact other departments, it counts against us in one of our performance-based incentives. It’s called contact rate, and it counts what percentage of our calls we have to contact another department for. Even if they don’t take over the call, it still counts on our contact rate.

I give my introduction, and immediately the customer goes into a long rant about what’s going on. Basically, she was sent a defective item. She returned it and was sent another item which also turned out to be defective. She definitely has a valid complaint. I would be super frustrated in her shoes, too. I start to offer to send another item (required as our first solution) and she interrupts me.

Caller: “No! I don’t want that. Here’s what I want. I want to send you this crap back and just get a refund. I don’t want to deal with this or your company anymore!”

She sounds pretty mad, so at this point, I consider contacting my escalations team, but we aren’t supposed to unless they specifically ask to speak to someone else. My contact rate is high already, I totally understand why she is upset, and she is asking for something I am capable of doing, so I decide to just push through my nerves and be helpful.

Me: “Absolutely. I completely understand your frustration, and I am so sorry this happened. Just return the item with the prepaid shipping label that was included, and I’ll go ahead and get started on a refund request.”

Caller: *Now shouting* “What?! I want to talk to your supervisor! So you’re not gonna come up with a solution? You’re just gonna do what I tell you to do?! Unbelievable! Get me a supervisor now!”

It really took my brain a few seconds to comprehend what she had said. I could not believe she was mad because I agreed to do what she requested.

It took several minutes to get her to accept the escalations team in place of a supervisor, but eventually, she said that was okay. I was just so shocked that I got yelled at for that.

That Escalated Quickly, Part 2
That Escalated Quickly

A Far Cry From Clever

, , , , | Right | June 21, 2022

Customer: “Hey, bro, can I return this used copy of Far Cry?”

My guy, punching a hole in the faded receipt where the date was printed isn’t going to help you.

I scanned the receipt’s printed barcode to return the product, and the barcode helpfully informed me that the guy had bought this game five years ago.