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Cute As The Dickens, Dumb As A Box Of Rocks

, , , , , | Working | August 18, 2021

I ordered a copy of “Bleak House” by Charles Dickens from a local bookstore because I wanted a certain edition. When it arrived, I went by to pick it up and had this conversation with the cashier.

Cashier: “Oh, I saw this book on the hold shelf. It’s big.”

Me: “Yeah, I needed this edition.”

Cashier: “Charles Dickens is the guy who wrote Moby Dick, right?”

Me: *Pauses* “No.”

Cashier: “Oh, I guess I’ve never heard of him.”

Me: “Everyone’s heard of Charles Dickens. Even if you’ve never read him, you’ve heard of some of his stuff.”

Cashier: “Really?”

Me: “Yeah, he wrote A Christmas Carol, Oliver Twist, A Tale of Two Cities…”

Cashier: “Ohhhhh… Did he also write The Count Of Monte Cristo?”

Me: “What?”

Cashier: “Well, that one’s big, too.”

Me: “Please stop. One, you’re embarrassing yourself, and two, you work in a bookstore; you need to educate yourself.”

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I Don’t Math Good When I’m Tired, Either

, , , , , , | Working | August 18, 2021

I’m in a shop known for its alternative fashion. I approach the counter to ring up my item.

Cashier: “Is that all today? That’ll be $88.”

I hand over my cash and they hand me back $12 in change.

Cashier: “Oh! You’ve spent over $50, so feel free to pick out a gift from our mystery box.”

I pick out a beanie. They go to fold up my item and notice an old sale tag of $70.40 on it.

Cashier: “We can honour this price. Let me just ring it up for you again.”

I’m pleasantly surprised, and I wait for them to scan it again. And then I wait. And wait. They mumble something about a calculator being bad, and I realise they can’t figure out how much to give me in change. I mentally do the math and realise the amount of change I’m supposed to have, but I am too socially awkward to bring it up. Eventually, they call their coworker over.

Cashier: “How much change am I supposed to give them? The calculator’s broken.”

Coworker: “Uhhh… seventeen… sixty? I think? Do you have your phone calculator on you?”

Cashier: “That sounds right… but I want to make sure.”

Me: “Yeah, it’s $17.60.”

I open the calculator on my phone and show them the maths. The cashier finally hands me my change.

Cashier: “Sorry about that. It’s been a long day; I don’t trust my head.”

Me: “I get that. Have a nice day!”

I walked out of that shop with an extra beanie, three receipts, and $17.60 more than I expected, as well as a story to tell.

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Give Me A Little Credit!

, , , , , , | Working | July 5, 2021

I am standing in the checkout lane at a popular makeup store. There are several checkout counters open, including a “credit and debit card” only lane. I am called to the counter to checkout.

Employee: “Are you paying with a credit or debit card?”

I place my two items on the counter. I am purchasing an eyeliner for myself and a gift card for a friend.

Me: “Yes, I am paying with a debit card.”

Employee: “Okay. Do you want to sign up for a store credit card?”

Me: “No, thank you.”

The employee scans my eyeliner and then scans the gift card. The employee suddenly looks very angry.

Employee: “What are you trying to do?”

I am extremely taken aback and confused by the question. 

Me: “What?”

Employee: “What are you trying to do with this gift card?!”

I have no idea why the employee has changed from relatively pleasant to practically yelling at me.

Me: “I want to add $50 to the gift card.” 

I think this is a very clear request, but the employee looks at me with suspicion.

Employee: “You didn’t say that.”

At this point, I’ve only been at the counter for a minute. After the employee’s question about the store credit card, there hasn’t been time for me to say anything about the gift card. I’m also wondering why they didn’t just ask instead of yelling at me. But, at this point, I just want the transaction to be over.

Me: “Okay, sorry. I want to add $50.”

The employee continues to look at me as if I am trying to trick them. 

Employee: “I thought you were trying to pay with the gift card.”

Me: “No, this is the credit and debit card only lane. I am paying with a debit card.”

Employee: “Well, some people think that they can pay with a gift card in this lane.”

For the third time…

Me: “Okay, but I am not paying with a gift card. I am buying it.”

The employee grumbled but completed the transaction, still glaring at me. I left as quickly as possible. 

I’m not entirely sure what the employee’s problem was that day, but I think they thought I was trying to steal the makeup with a bad gift card.

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How Dare You Buy Stuff We Have In Stock?!

, , , , , , , | Working | June 30, 2021

Due to the current health crisis, my husband and I have tried to figure out ways to limit the number of visits to various stores. We also enjoy having some beer on the weekend. Instead of going to the beer store once or twice a week, we decide to buy a month’s supply at a time. This happens while we’re checking out at the beer store.

Husband: *To the cashier* “Hi, I’ve got [number] cases here.”

Cashier: *Sucks her teeth and replies with an instant attitude* “You know, that only leaves us with [other number] of cases to sell to other customers.”

Husband: “Well, I’ll be putting this on a debit card.”

The transaction is completed. The cashier calls out to my husband as he is exiting the store.

Cashier: “And I don’t appreciate you coming in here when we are due to close in twenty minutes!”

I was shocked by the interaction when my husband told me. I have felt the attitude from that particular clerk before. I know the owner by sight and made a mental note to speak with him the next time I saw him around town. When I told him, he apologized to me and told me that his clients can buy however much of something that they want and can walk in with one minute until closing if they want. He told me that it was not the first complaint about that cashier and if there was one more, she would be gone. She must have had another complaint because I never saw her in the store again.

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Technology Makes Everything Easier!

, , , , , | Working | June 30, 2021

I go to a fast food chain location I’m not familiar with to wait to meet somebody. There’s a small queue but I see self-ordering machines. I’ve never seen one before, so I go to have a look. All I want is a coffee.

I go through the ordering process, and when it’s time for payment information, I have the choice of credit, debit, or cash. Again, it’s only for a coffee, and I have loose change in my pocket, so I select cash.

The receipt prints out, and as I turn around, I see my order number appearing on the screen.

Then I wait… and wait… and notice that other order numbers, higher than mine, are going over. Mine doesn’t move down. I get in line and wait, and when I finally reach the cashier, I hand her my receipt.

Me: “Silly, but my order isn’t coming down. Is there a problem with the self-ordering machines?”

Cashier: “No, sir. Since you select cash, you have to pay before we make it. All you have to do is take your place in the queue and we’ll make it after you pay.”

Me: “Oh… then what’s the use of the cash option on the self-ordering terminals if we have to make the queue and then wait for our order to be made anyway?”

Cashier: *Blinks a few times* “I… I don’t know, sir. They’ve just been installed. That’s what we were told to do.”

I don’t know if that was really the rule sent by corporate or something misunderstood by the employees and manager, but I’ve never used the self-ordering machines for a cash order since.

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