Wish You Could Block Out Certain Words

, , , , | Right | March 20, 2019

(I work as a customer service rep for a call center; I help with cell phones. A customer calls in to request a block be placed on a number that was calling her. After getting all of the prerequisite information:)

Customer: “You see, I need to put a block on a number that keeps calling me all hours of the night.”

Me: “I can understand that, ma’am. I’d be more than happy to apply that block to your line so you don’t have to deal with this anym—“

Customer: “Yeah, he told me he wanted to suck my a**. I’m just not into all of that kind of stuff.”

(I laughed so hard that I had to hand the call off to my floor supervisor. I never found out if she got that number blocked, but she DID tell every person she talked to that some creep wanted to do lewd things to her, and described those things in detail.)

Mario-No-No

, , , | Right | March 20, 2019

(I’m helping out a friend who is managing a booth at one of the biggest video game swap meets in Canada. It’s pretty busy, and people are offering quite a few high-value trades. We have a bin of common, relatively cheap NES games at the front; the most expensive is Super Mario Bros 3 at $30. A kid, about 12, zones in and grabs it as soon as the swap meet opens.)

Kid: “How much for the Mario?” *ignoring the sticker price on it*

Me: “It’s $30, sir.”

Kid: “Can you do $15?”

Me: “Sorry, no can do.”

(The kid puts it back without saying a word, but he roams around and browses our tables a few more times. Eventually, he comes back with a tacky Chewbacca bobblehead that’s probably worth a few bucks.)

Kid: “Hey, can you do a trade for this?” *waves the Chewbacca bobblehead in my face*

Me: “All trades have to go through my boss. I’ll let you talk to him.”

Boss: *comes up after a minute* “Hey, what do you have there?”

Kid: “Will you trade this Chewbacca bobblehead for Mario 3?”

Boss: “Sorry, I’m not really interested in taking toys.”

Kid: *pause* “So, will you trade this for Mario 3?”

Boss: “Sorry, but no.”

Kid: “How about if I trade a game with it?”

Boss: “Depends on what you bring me.”

Kid: “What if I trade two games with it?”

Boss: “It still depends on what you bring me.”

Kid: “So… will you do $15 for this and some games?”

Boss: “I’d still need to see which games.”

(My boss then walked away, and the kid just gave a frustrated look and wandered off. He came by at least one more time, still holding that Chewbacca bobblehead. I know he’s a kid, but he was still old enough to know no means no.)

Rubber? You Bet!

, , , , , | Right | March 20, 2019

(It’s my first weekend cashiering by myself after finishing my training. I’m at the speedy checkout at the slower end of the store finishing up helping a lady, when I look over and see three boys about my age walking up. I am a very innocent person, and one boy has a box of condoms.)

Boy: “I’m sorry. I lost a bet.”

Me: *not making eye contact* “You’re fine.”

Boy: “This is so awkward.”

Me: “It won’t be if you don’t make it.”

Boy: “It’s a good thing I’m Indian so you can’t see me blush.”

(It took everything I had to hold it together, and to this day I regret not asking what the bet was.)

When You Post A Review You’re Under Review

, , , | Right | March 20, 2019

(I work at an arcade with batting cages, and we have a play park. Everyone who goes into the play park must purchase a wristband. We send staff periodically to check and make sure no one has snuck in. I also run the Facebook page, and I receive this message, which is a screenshot of a review he made a couple of days ago.)

Customer: “Worst f****** experience ever! We went there so my son could get some practice hitting. As he finished up, he wanted to play in the arcade and in the ball pit, which was all fine and good. Well, he was playing in the ball pit, and some teenagers who were playing in there at the same time but had no business being in there were horse playing and they hit him in the eye. No one apologized about it, and they all scattered like roaches when the kitchen light comes on. Then, furthermore, while we went in there playing with our kids — eight and almost a year old — we were told we have to leave because we didn’t have wristbands and we weren’t supposed to be in there. I felt that my character was discriminated against that night, and believe me, we will not, and I repeat not be coming back!”

Me: “Hi, [Customer], I’m sorry you had a bad experience Sunday. I don’t know how the review evaded my sight, as I usually see every one that appears. So, thank you for bringing it to my attention. However, while you are right that the teenagers had no business being in there, I honestly have to say you had no right to be in there, either, since you did not purchase a wristband to be in there. It wasn’t your character that was being discriminated against; we kick everyone out who has not purchased a wristband.”

Customer: “That’s not the point. The point of the matter is that nothing was done about it until we got there, and the people there were choosing sides because you believe what people tell you. It was basically black against white, but we definitely are not coming back to that h***-hole.”

Me: “Okay, maybe I’m not understanding what the problem here is. Did you tell our staff that there were teenagers roughhousing in the Play Park and nothing was done? Or is it that you were kicked out of the Play Park because you did not purchase wristbands, or something else?”

(The customer doesn’t respond after that. But my favorite part is what other customers commented on his review.)

Customer #1: “Sounds like you should be more upset with the teenagers than the place.”

Customer #2: “Right. You’re giving this place a bad rating for other people’s actions, and for the fact that you obviously missed the sign that clearly states you need a wristband to play in the ball pit area.”

Customer #3: “Good sports are not for weak-minded cry-babies.”

Customer #4: “You should have stepped up as his father and said something to the teenagers. Whenever my autistic son is in there, if other children’s parents are not enforcing their child to play according to the rules, with my son in the ball pit, I will not hesitate to politely tell the kids to calm down, play nice, and remember that not everyone is the same age, and you have to be cautious of the little ones. I have never had an issue with other parents getting angry or at all upset with me for going out of my way to ensure my son’s safety from kids that are playing too rough in the ball pit area. And yes, it clearly states on the entrance to the soft play area the price; it was your ignorance that had your son removed, not the employees of [Company] treating you any different from any other customer. Perhaps you should pay more attention to small details clearly posted in locations you attend.”

The Non-Gift-Receipt That Keeps On Giving

, , , , | Right | March 20, 2019

(I’m working as a cashier a month or two after the holiday season, like late January or February. A lot of customers come in without receipts — not even gift receipts — and want full refunds in the form of cash; both of these things are against store policy. A family walks in with a bag so I assume they’re going to return or exchange.)

Me: “Hello. How are y’all doing today?”

Customer: “I need to exchange this shirt I got as a gift; it’s too big.”

(It’s a large, and this dude is RIPPED, but he wants a medium.)

Me: “Okay, no problem. Can I see your receipt?”

Customer: “I don’t have one. It was a gift.”

Me: “Okay. If you don’t have a receipt or a gift receipt, can I have the name of the person who purchased it so I can see if they are enrolled in our rewards program?”

Customer: “Look. I just want to switch the shirt out.”

Me: “I understand, but without a receipt or the ability to locate the purchase, I will have to do a no-receipt return for you, and I can only give you the lowest price this shirt has ever been. I’d like to do an even exchange, if you could just give me the name of the person who purchased this for you, please.”

(The customer gives me the name, and I find it, so I explain that the shirt was purchased on sale and I can do an even exchange for that exact shirt in a different size. He comes back to the register with a gray shirt; I have already explained that he needs to get the same red shirt in his desired size.)

Me: *starting the return, hoping maybe the shirt is still on sale, only to find out it isn’t* “Okay. For the gray shirt, you will owe the difference, which is $10.”

Customer: “No, I’m not paying that.”

Me: “Unfortunately, I can’t correct the price unless it is the exact same item.” *as I had previously explained.*

Customer: *proceeding to yell and cuss at me in front of his wife and child* “This is bulls***! Whatever. I’ll pay the difference.”

Me: “Again, I apologize, but there is nothing I can do to lower the price unless you want to get the red shirt.”

(I take his money, complete the transaction, and tell them to have a good day.)

Customer: “Actually, I want that red shirt I just returned for the price it was purchased at the time my friend got it for me.”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but this since it has been returned, I can only give it to you for the price it rings up now, which is the same price you just paid for the gray one.”

(He BLEW up, and my manager heard him and came up. She ended up having me give him the red one and his $10 back just to get him out of there, but a little bit of me died inside as he walked out calling me stupid because my manager backed down to him.)

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