Unable To Ring Them Up

, , , | Right | September 25, 2018

(I’m working as a sales agent at a rather popular jewelry TV show. Unfortunately, we do get these calls very often.)

Me: “Welcome to [Workplace]. This is [My Name]; how may I assist you today?”

Customer: “I saw a ring that had champagne diamonds in it and I want that ring.”

(I get 48 pages of results, so to narrow it down, I begin to ask questions.)

Me: “Okay, what carat weight was it?”

Customer: “I don’t know.”

Me: “Okay, do you have the product ID number?”

Customer: *sighs, getting irritated* “No…”

Me: “Well, can you describe it to me so I can narrow it down to make this go by quicker for you?”

Customer: “Can’t you just look the d*** s*** up? God, why are you making this so difficult?”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m trying to make this as simple as possible, but I have 48 pages of results, and I won’t know which one unless you can find a way to describe it to m—”

Customer: *cutting me off and yelling* “Well, I’m going to just call someone else here, and they’ll find my ring, since you’re making this so difficult because you’re letting your stupidity get in the way. Stupid c***. I’m also going to call and complain, and you’re going to be out of a job.”

(I still have my job, and she’s gotten me several more times. She will still ask if “that stupid c***” has been fired yet, and when I tell her it’s me, she hangs up. She’s even gotten me a couple of times after she hung up, and she hung up on me again afterwards.)

Entitled: The TV Show

, , , | Right | September 3, 2018

(I work in the electronics department. Most of our customers are not too terrible, but being a rural town has its “quirks.” As such, we have more employees that can be just as abrasive when needed. I just get to the sales floor and start doing some chatting with my colleague, when a husband and wife walk up to the counter and this happens.)

Me: “Hello, can we help you find anything today?”

Husband: “You sure as h*** can!” *points at a TV display on a main aisle* “You see them 55″ TVs? I bought one of them f****** things a week ago for [price] WITH tax!”

Me: *bobbing my head, being understanding* “Okay, and was something wrong with it? If there was we—”

(The customer’s wife pipes up.)

Wife: “Nah, nothin’ like that. WE bought it for [price]! Not THAT price!”

Husband: “Yeah, now how’s come them TV’s are [price]?! If I knew that they would be this low I woulda f****** waited!”

(Confused, I look between the two customers.)

Me: “Well, that is unfortun—”

Husband: “We want one of them reimbursements! It ain’t fair that we bought our TV, and it changed price a week later!” *at this point they both are raising their voices*

(My brain has shut off as I look dumbfounded. Both my colleague and I look at each other completely at a loss for what to do, having never been trained for what entails a reimbursement.)

Me: “All right, give me one moment.” *I call over the walkie for management and then wait*

(The husband starts ranting about how unfair it is that there was a price change.)

Husband: “We are f****** ENTITLED to a reimbursement! I can’t believe how you guys could sell us that TV without telling us that the price would change! I mean, I understand you gotta sell this s***, but this just ain’t fair.”

Me: “Yes, well, I apologize, but I have no power over that. I also want to make sure that we can make the reimbursement. We don’t normally do that kind of thing and if it had been a week ago, I’m not too certain what the cut-off is. That seems more than likely up to manager’s discretion.”

(I have lost that “Peppy Happy voice” and drop to a more “steel, serious voice”, but manage to keep the smiles, as he curses more and rants about us not being “fair” and them being “entitled.”)

Manager: *walks up in full manager-mode* “What can I do for you all?”

(We explain the situation and she gives the go ahead for the reimbursement and notifies customer service, then the couple leaves.)

Me: *I shake my head, still annoyed* “I’m pretty certain that those TV’s have been on sale for more than a week, [Manager].”

Manager: “I wouldn’t doubt you guys, but hey, maybe the receipt will do something.”

It Was A Good Death!

, , , , , | Working | July 27, 2018

(My brother and I are buying our first car together at a used car lot. We’ve chosen a car we’re interested in and negotiated a reasonable price, but since this is a relatively recent car and in good condition, it’s still roughly $10,000.)

Salesman: “The next step in the process is to set up a payment plan.”

Me: “Actually, I don’t think we need one. We were just planning to write you a check.”

Brother: “Yeah, our grandmother died and left us enough money for a car.”

Salesman: “Oh, good!”

(You could see the exact moment he realized he’d just implied that it was good our grandmother had died. We reassured him that we knew he meant it was good we had the money, and that she had died peacefully at a very old age — which she had — but I’m sure for a second the poor guy thought he’d just lost his commission.)

Soliciting Deceit

, , , , , | | Working | May 21, 2018

(My mom and I are at home when someone knocks on our door rhythmically, as though they are a friend or relative. My mom has several health issues that tend to make her sleep in a lot, so she’s still in her night clothes. Since the person knocking tapped a little tune on our door, she figures it’s someone we know, so she answers the door in her nightshirt. It’s a guy in a business uniform for a cable service. He looks my mom up and down with a sneer, his arms crossed.)

Cable Guy: “Is there a problem here?”

Mom: “Uh, excuse me? No, there is not. Can I help you?”

(He puts on a massive sales-pitch grin, readying his pitch:)

Cable Guy: “Well, ma’am, we at [Cable Company #1] are going around to customers of [Cable Company #2] to let them know about [some malarkey about a sale or something].”

Mom: *holds up her hand* “I’m going to stop you right there.” *she gestures to the obvious “NO SOLICITING” sign on our door* “Did you not see that?”

Cable Guy: “Well, ma’am, I’m not soliciting; I’m just trying to do you a favour—”

Mom: “Yeah, that’s soliciting.” *closes the door in his face*

Upselling Is Their Downfall

, , , , , | Working | March 29, 2018

(I get a call from my husband saying that we will have a friend from out of town staying over for a weekend. We have just moved into a new house and do not have furniture for the guest bedroom yet. I head down to a furniture store to purchase a bedroom set. Immediately after I enter, a salesman approaches me and asks what I’m looking for. This particular company’s employees work on commission, so it’s not unusual.)

Me: “We have guests coming in two days and I need a full bedroom set: queen-sized bed frame, mattress, dresser, nightstand, etc. Bedding would be great, too, so I don’t have to visit another store!”

Salesman: “Perfect, anything particular in mind?”

Me: “Well, since it’s for a guest room, I’d like to stay on the cheaper side. It may only be used once or twice in the next year.”

Salesman: “Okay, great. Over here, we have our [Fancy Descriptive Name #1] set; it includes a dresser, armoire, king-sized headboard and footboard, frame, and two nightstands. It comes in dark wood or white. Which color would you prefer?”

(I look over at the set he is referencing, and the price tag is well over $8,000 — without the mattress!)

Me: “I’m sorry, but as I said, it’s for a guest room, and I want to stay on the cheaper side. I’m pretty sure this is the most expensive set in here, and, as I said, I need a queen-sized set. King would be too wide for the room with the dresser.”

Salesman: “No worries! I also have this [Fancy Descriptive Name #2] set that comes with a dresser, double headboard and footboard, frame, and one nightstand. This one is only available in light-wood, but it’s a great set and sure to brighten up the dull house.”

(Not once have I described my home to him, and as a matter of fact, it is a gorgeous house with oak trim and moulding, Berber carpets, hardwood, and slate tile. The price tag on the second set is $3,500.)

Me: “Okay… So, again, I need queen-sized, and on the cheaper end. It doesn’t have to be solid wood. I’m fine with an MDF (Medium Density Fiberboard) set. I’d like to stay under $1,500.”

Salesman: “I don’t think I can work with that budget and get you something nice. How about this?”

(He shows me a single bed with an ornate canopy frame and marble-embedded dresser trim.)

Me: “Thanks for your time.”

(I start walking away but spot the perfect set tucked away in a corner. Clearance pricing, queen-sized bed, dresser, and nightstand. It’s very close to my total budget, as I’d need a mattress still, but looks to be well worth the price.)

Salesman: “Ah, that set is on clearance due to being the floor display. You don’t want that; it’ll look cheap.”

Me: “I’ll take it. What is the cheapest mattress you have?”

Salesman: “No, really. You don’t want that set, unless you can’t afford something nicer.”

Me: “Thanks for your opinion, but I’d like this one. Again, what’s your cheapest mattress?”

Salesman: “If you insist! Our [fancy memory foam pillow top mattress] is on sale right now, for only $1,199!”

Me: “I’ll look myself, thanks. Ring me up for the bedroom set and I’ll let you know which mattress I decide on.”

(I find a good quality mattress on sale for only a couple hundred dollars, and it seems to be the cheapest one. I return to the salesman, who is watching me like a hawk, and point to the one I want. He tries to upsell some more, but finally understands I’ll have none of it. We are completing the order on the till and he gives me my total, several thousand dollars higher than my math says it should be.)

Me: “Uh, why is the price so high? It should be $3,200 less than that.”

Salesman: “Oh, I figured you’d rather have a brand new bedroom set instead of the floor model, and I added a [slightly higher quality, but double the price] mattress, instead, and gave you 10% off.”

Me: “I want the items I picked out. That’s all I’ll pay for. Is there a manager around?”

Salesman: “I’m the manager on duty, currently! So, debit or credit? If you put it on your [Store] credit card, you don’t have to pay for a whole year, or you can finance it over three years and get the nicer set I know you want but can’t afford! I know it’s tough right now, but financing is the best way to get nice things. Wouldn’t want your guests thinking you’re poor, huh?” *snickers*

(I’m now in total shock and disgust, but noticing the time, I realize that every other furniture store is already closed, and I live 45 minutes away.)

Me: “Okay. Here’s what’s going to happen. Either you can shut your mouth and sell me what I asked for, and stop insulting me, or you can get another salesperson to serve me and get the commission. Your choice.”

Salesman: “All I was saying is—”

Me: “THANK YOU!”

(I walk away and find another salesperson, a woman, standing by the door. I explain what I need, show her what I want, and she rings me up.)

Saleswoman: “Great! Will that be on your [Store] credit card?”

Me: “No, and not interested. I think this will be the last time I shop here.”

Saleswoman: “I’m sorry to hear that. I put a 10% off coupon on your entire purchase for the hassle. The total is [amount less than I anticipated].”

Me: “Great. Debit, please.”

(I slide my card into the reader. The saleswoman starts a little spiel and mentions that my order will be ready to be picked up on the following Monday.)

Me: “Wait, what? I need it for this weekend. Now. It’s Thursday night; my guests arrive tomorrow afternoon. I have my truck, and my dad is bringing another from [Town an hour away] right now. He’s almost here! Everything I want is sitting right there; that mattress is in stock!”

Saleswoman: “Actually, that mattress is sold to another customer and awaiting pickup on [date two weeks from today]. We would have to bring you one from the warehouse, and it will get here on Monday.”

Me: “Can’t you sell me that one, and keep the other for the other customer? That’s two weeks away; that’s plenty of time.”

Saleswoman: “I’m sorry, no. I can’t do that. That’s the last one we have, and the warehouse is out.”

Me: “WHAT AM I PAYING FOR, THEN? You know what? Never mind. Forget it. I’m done.”

(I walked out, and both salespeople stood there looking confused as to why I was so mad. I checked the local classifieds on my phone and found the EXACT set in great shape, with a brand new mattress, for $500. The best part? The seller lived five doors down from me.)

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