Not Getting That Friday Feeling

, , , , , , | Working | September 21, 2017

(I only have one other coworker who has exactly the same position as me in our department. He’s a nice enough guy, but staggeringly incompetent at our job, which frustrates me to no end because cleaning up his messes dramatically complicates my duties. I was excited when we brought him on, because the department was a lot for me to handle alone, but he makes so many mistakes I’m not sure I’m actually working less. We used to work side-by-side frequently, but the schedule recently changed so now we mostly work opposite shifts except for overlapping on one day. This means I’m not around to babysit him as much as before. It’s important we communicate about what work is being handed off, and I always make clear to customers which days I’m in the office and which days they will catch him instead. One Friday, close to closing time, the phone rings.)

Receptionist: “[My Name], can you take a call? She asked for [Coworker], but he’s off today; when I told her she got pretty pissed. I’m hoping you can help her.”

(I end up talking to her for quite a while, getting the situation untangled. Afterwards:)

Receptionist: “Were you able to get it figured out?”

Me: “Yeah, and I don’t blame her for being angry. [Coworker] worked with her last week, and she talked to him again Monday. He told her, ‘I promise I’ll call you by the end of the day Friday. I’m writing it in my calendar so I don’t forget.’ That’s awfully specific, and sounds like something he’d say; I don’t think she was lying. And she never heard from him today, so that’s why she called.”

Receptionist: “…but he didn’t work today.”

Me: “Yep. He only worked Monday and Tuesday this week. I know he’s usually here Wednesday, too, but last Friday is the only Friday he’s worked since the schedule change, because I traded for Wednesday. He NEVER works Friday otherwise. And he definitely never told me about her.”

Receptionist: “Wow.”

Me: “And, get this: I checked, and he never actually ordered the parts to fix her car in the first place. Both when she first came in, AND when she talked to him again.”

Receptionist: “Seriously?”

Me: “Yep. I took care of it and booked her for Monday when he’s back. Unlike what he did to me, I’ll actually tell him what’s going on, so he doesn’t get blindsided.”

(What I happened to know that WOULD blindside him is that he would be written up Monday, twice, for two separate mistakes that cost the department over a thousand dollars, a week after getting written up for doing a horrible job helping a different customer. I don’t think he’ll be with us much longer.)

Driving Home Those Sales

, , , , | Related | September 21, 2017

(We are saving for a trip to Savannah, so our Girl Scouts are having booth sales everywhere. A car dealership invited us to have a sale at their lot, and it is slow. Not many people come to a dealership to buy cookies. My girls are Juniors, aged 9-11, and are bored. My daughter is standing at the table asking everyone who walks by to buy cookies, and finally a man comes up, with the owner of the dealership.)

Man: *asking my daughter* “How much for a box of cookies?”

Daughter: “$15,000, and I’ll throw in that truck.”

(The owner burst out laughing, and told her that she had a job anytime she wanted it, once she was an adult! The man bought two cases before we went home.)

Your Salary This Year Will Be Impotent

, , , , | Working | September 20, 2017

(My coworker likes to occasionally “pick on” some of the sales managers, but it’s all in good fun, and they know she’s just joking.)

Coworker: *shouting out the window of the office to one of the managers* “[MANAGER], ARE YOU IMPOTENT?”

Me: “[Coworker], you can’t say that!”

Coworker: “Why?”

Me: “Do you know what that means?”

Coworker: “Doesn’t it just mean, like, unimportant?”

Me: “No! It means a guy can’t get it up!”

Coworker: “Oh.”

(At this point, the manager comes over, and he’s just dying of laughter.)

Me: “Never say that again!”

Unfiltered Story #92601

, , , | Unfiltered | September 2, 2017

(Background: I was shopping for a car. I foolishly allowed myself to be put through a high-pressure situation that ate up most of my Saturday as I was slowly guilted (yes, guilted) into nearly buying a car that was WAY outside of my budget. I didn’t have the self-confidence to control the situation, nor the knowledge of my options and power as the consumer, and the salesman took full advantage of it. He also, through the course of conversation, learned that I was (am) a Christian and in an attempt to connect with me he mentioned that he “goes to church, too.” I came to my senses regarding the sale and walked away when I was able to get away from him for about 30 minutes and was about to sign the financing. I booked it out of the dealership before the salesman could find out what happened and catch me in his claws again. However, he proceeded to call me and leave me no less than 8 voice mails over the next day and a half trying to get me to come back in and rework the sale. I did call him back once–after probably the fifth voicemail–to try to put an end to it but he wasn’t taking “no” for an answer. The following Monday I’m browsing around other car lots and hear my phone ring. I answer the phone reflexively before I can think about it. As soon as I accept the call, but before anyone says anything, I know who it is.)

ME: “. . . (sigh) . . . Hello?”

SALESMAN: “HEEEEEEEEEEEEEY [MY NAME]! How you doing? This is [Salesman] over at [Dealership] and I was thinking about our DEAL–”

ME: [hangs up]

(The phone rang again about 10 seconds later and I let it go to voicemail. I listened to it later.)

SALESMAN: (very calm) “Hey there, [my name]. This is [Salesman] down at [dealership]. Hey I’m just so sorry that you feel so bad . . . in dealing with me . . . that AS A CHRISTIAN you think it’s okay to just hang up on me and not even give me the day of time [sic]. But you know what? That’s fine, man. I hope you have a nice life and that you find the car that you’re looking for. Bye.”

(Never heard from him again, thank goodness. Important car-buying lessons learned, and a great story gained, as a result, though).

Branded You Unworthy Of Their Brand

, , , | Working | August 28, 2017

(My dad was a church pastor for years, and this is one of his favorite stories about not letting what you see fool you. The chairman of our church board is an old, widowed, retired pastor who, in his retirement, has acquired several businesses and made them moderately successful. This means he drives very nice luxury cars from [High End German Brand]. However, he’s taken a liking to the styling of a new [High End American Brand] sedan, and decides one day to stop into his local dealer and test drive one. He’s just finished mowing his very large yard, and as such, is dressed the part: cutoff jean shorts, a somewhat grimy T-shirt, and grass-stained tennis shoes. He pulls up in his work truck and enters the showroom. He waits for thirty minutes before anyone even acknowledges his presence. He approaches the reception desk and asks to talk to a salesman.)

Reception: “I think they’re all with other customers, sir.”

(He looks around, sees several sitting in their offices, drinking coffee, reading, or otherwise NOT with customers. He begins to figure this out.)

Chairman: “That’s okay, ma’am. I’ll just look around a bit.”

(He looks around, finds the sedan he’s interested in, and manages to get a salesman to talk to him for a few seconds.)

Salesman: “Yes, sir, that’s a fine automobile. Just started getting those in last week. Here’s a brochure and my card. When you’re ready to pick one up, give me a call.” *He then walks away.*

([Chairman] leaves and goes home. He showers, shaves, and puts on a suit. Then he drives back up to the dealer in his [High End German Luxury Car] and parks. He doesn’t make it to the door before three salesmen are trying to corral him. He stops them.)

Chairman: “I’m here to see [Salesman].” *holding up the business card he was given*

(They dutifully go and get [Salesman]. [Chairman] greets him warmly and shakes his hand and asks how he’s been since they’ve talked last. The salesman looks puzzled.)

Salesman: “Have we met? I know you have my card, but I don’t think we’ve met…”

Chairman: “We sure did, not 90 minutes ago. I was the old guy in cutoff jean shorts who was prepared to drop fifty thousand bucks on that car in your showroom. Remember me now?”

(The salesman’s jaw dropped and he stammered out that he did, indeed, remember. [Chairman] sat down with him and his sales manager, they had a long talk, and much discounting of the sale price of the car went on. Finally, [Chairman] stood up, thanked them for their time, and walked out, without the car. He drove thirty extra miles to buy it from a competing dealer, who, when he showed up there in his cutoffs and grass-stained shoes, immediately offered him a seat and a cold drink, asked him how they could assist him, and got him a salesman in less than five minutes. He’s driven that brand ever since.)

Page 1/2112345...Last
Next »