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Family Management

, , , , | Working | May 17, 2025

I work in a small independent shop where most of the workers are family. I am one of the few workers not related to anyone here. The manager (uncle) and a coworker (cousin) are arguing:

Manager: “Why is inventory always off when you’re in charge of counting?”

Coworker: “Because numbers fear me. I am the chaos.”

Manager: “…Just use the scanner.”

Coworker: “The scanner and I had a falling out.”

Manager: “You’ll never be able to manage the business at this rate.”

Coworker: “One can hope.”

Manager: “Do you not want to be here?”

Coworker: “What gave it away? My utter disdain for everything here, or my application to university in Scotland, chosen because it’s the furthest I could physically get from this shop?”

Manager: “Fine.” *Looks at me.* “[My Name], want to manage the place some day?”

Me: “…Sure.”

And that’s how I went from an uneducated sixteen-year-old to managing an expansion to two other shops by the time I was twenty-five. One cousin’s apathy is another man’s gain! 

The cousin went on to study coding and has a great career for a software company, BTW.

This Shouldn’t Be As Shocking As It Is

, , , , , | Right | CREDIT: PhoenixApok | May 17, 2025

I work in a restaurant. I had a table come in yesterday while things were kind of slow. They seemed to be three generations of a family: grandma, younger daughter, and a baby maybe close to a year old. They were fairly polite.

They ordered their kid some noodles early on, and I eventually bring out the kiddo’s food. I leave the table to get them some napkins, and when I get back, I already see noodles on the floor. Not exactly new or unexpected.

Grandma: *Smiling at me* “I’m sorry about the floor.”

Me: “Don’t worry. It’s not that uncommon, and it looks pretty minimal.”

Grandma: *Laughing* “It will get worse.”

She wasn’t kidding. They kept asking for more napkins and water, and every time I came back, there was more and more stuff on the ground.

The table was a disaster, but they finally finished. They asked for some more napkins and some to-go boxes, and I obliged, also dropping the check.

I ran off to use the bathroom and gave them time to take care of the check. I came back and was absolutely stunned.

Not only had everything been pushed and stacked neatly, but the mother had completely cleaned under the table. The table itself was completely wiped down. When I walked up, the grandmother was holding the child while the mom was actually scrubbing our high chair!

Never in my years of serving has a table with a messy kid 100% cleaned up after themselves.

And they apologized again! And they left a 40% tip!

What is this world coming to?!

The More You Read The Worse It Gets: Mexican (Kinda) Edition

, , , , , , , , | Right | May 15, 2025

I’m working at a bar in Albuquerque International Airport. A family of recent arrivals approaches me, looking a little lost. The father in the family asks me:

Dad: “Where’s the car rental place?”

I give him the directions, but then notice that they’re all a little… under-dressed.

Me: “You guys look like you’re dressed for a hot summer’s day!”

Dad: “Well, yeah, it’s Mexico.”

Me: “Well, actually it’s New Mexico… and it’s February.”

Dad: “So?”

Me: “It’s fourteen degrees outside (-10°C).”

Dad: “What?! That’s impossible! It’s Mexico!”

Me: “It’s New Mexico, and it gets cold here in the winter.”

Mom: “But we don’t have jackets! The kids don’t have jackets! We’re all going to freeze!”

Me: “There are some stores in the airport that sell clothes, ma’am. You should be fine.”

Mom: *To her husband.* “Did we land in the wrong airport? I thought this was Mexico?!”

Dad: “This guy keeps saying it’s New Mexico.”

Mom: “Well, how do we get to Old Mexico? Is it hotter there?”

Me: “You could drive south about four hours to El Paso, where you cross the border into Mexico. Checking my phone right now, though, and it’s only a few degrees warmer there.”

Dad: “Since when did it get cold in Mexico? Is this global warming?”

Mom: “That must be it! We’re in Mexico, so they have global warming! We don’t have global warming in America…”

I decided to once again point them in the direction of the clothing outlets and ended the conversation as quickly as possible to save my remaining brain cells…

Related:

The More You Read The Worse It Gets: Canadian Edition
The More You Read The Worse It Gets, Part 27
The More You Read The Worse It Gets, Part 26
The More You Read The Worse It Gets, Part 25
The More You Read The Worse It Gets, Part 24

It Falls Mainly On The Plain, Anyway…

, , , , | Related | May 15, 2025

I’m about five, on a family vacation to Spain:

Me: *Looking out at the sky and clouds forming over the ocean.* “Dad? If there are rainclouds in Spain, does it rain?”

Dad: “No. Everyone knows hot sunny places don’t get rain.”

Mom: “John. You’re an AP geography and biology teacher in a high school. You really should know how wrong you are.”

Dad: “I have the degree, so I know I’m right. None of you can tell me otherwise until you have my level of certification.”

Mom: “…I really feel sorry for your students.”

Like The “Goofus And Gallant” Of Vacationing Families

, , , , , , , , , , | Right | May 7, 2025

This was many years ago, during one of the first tax-free weekends in Texas. I decided to take my family down to Dallas and make it a weekend of shopping and spending a day or two at the large amusement park there. I prepaid for a weekend reservation at a hotel near the park.

When we walked into the lobby, there was a large family sitting around. A group of children were running around and being rather noisy, their fathers were sitting around and trying to watch TV, one grandmother was asleep in her chair, and a group of mothers were around the desk trying to see whose credit card would work for their rooms.

I patiently stood back, watching the chaos, until another desk clerk saw me and asked if I was checking in. The whole check-in process took five minutes. As I walked off, one of the mothers said loudly:

Mother: “Why does she get checked in so fast?”

Desk Clerk: “Because she planned ahead and prepaid for her reservation.”

I had to hide my grin.

We unpacked and decided to relax at the pool and hot tub. My family and I had not been down there for very long when all the children came running into the pool area, carrying plastic bottles of Kool-Aid, Skittles, and bologna sandwiches. They began jumping into the pool with their food, running and chasing each other, and really just being a major annoyance.

Eventually, my husband and son had had enough, and we left the pool area. On our way up to the room, we notified the front desk of what the children were doing and the fact that there was not an adult with them. The kids were not happy as the desk clerk made them leave the area — the noise they made was so loud I could hear them while in the elevator! (Later, we learned that they had to close the pool to remove all the Skittles, sandwiches, and other crap the kids had left.)

On Saturday, we got up early and spent the day at the nearby amusement park. When we get back to the hotel, there were four or five police cars parked out front. As we entered the lobby, we could hear screaming and yelling from the adults in the family, but we really didn’t pay attention. We went about our business, ordered dinner from a nearby pizza place, and went to bed.

On Sunday morning, I went to check out, and I found out that my card would be refunded for one night’s stay for my trouble because of the family. It seems that the mothers went shopping and left the children with their fathers and grandmother. The fathers left for a beer run, leaving the children with their grandmother. They once again went down to the pool, and the front desk staff made them go back to their rooms until an adult could come down with them.

Grandma was asleep while the children ran up and down the halls, chasing each other in and out of their rooms, slamming doors, and really making a ruckus. The front desk went up again to stop the noise and asked where an adult was. The children pointed out Grandma’s room, but they couldn’t wake up Grandma.

So, they called the police and paramedics. The fathers, gone for three or four hours at that point, came back from their beer run and promised that the kids wouldn’t be making any more noise and that Grandma was fine, she just tired easy.

The mothers came back, and they harassed the front desk so much that the general manager had enough and called the police to have them removed from the property with no refund.

Me: *To the desk clerk* “Well, thank you for the comp, but it’s not necessary.”

Desk Clerk: “It’s the least we can do.”

I found out later that I was given double points for my stay, including for the night that was comped. I have stayed at that hotel a few times since, and I’ve never had any other problems.

You front desk workers still have my respect. And the crap you have to put up with is ridiculous. You are truly worthy of some major recognition!