I am the front desk manager at a hotel in a small, isolated Maritime city that happens to be a very popular tourist destination. We are several hours away from the next big city and as such hotel rooms are in very high demand here during the summer months. This story takes place earlier in the summer during a very busy period when we are completely sold out of rooms, like every other hotel in the area. We had been sold out at this point for the past several weeks and we don’t have any vacancies coming up for at least another couple weeks.
I get a call one night from my front desk employee telling me she has an irate customer at the front desk and she needs my help. I hear the lady screaming in the background so without asking for details, I throw on some clothes, hop in my car and rush over. I walk in and am greeted by a tirade of swear words coming from this tiny, well dressed woman. I approach her and introduce myself.
Me: Hello! I am the manager, I understand we have a problem
Customer: Damn right we have a problem! This b***h won’t give me my f***ing room! I paid for it months ago, I flew all the way out here, 12 hours on a crowded plane and all I want to do is sleep! This dumb excuse for an employee is telling me that I don’t have a reservation and that you don’t even have a room! I’ve got the F***ing confirmation right here!
She shoves a hand full of papers at me which I take and read.
Me: I see. Well I’m sorry to hear about this ma’am, let’s see if we can sort all this out.
Customer: I don’t wanna here “sort this out.” I want a f***ing room and I want it in the next 2 minutes. Understood? You c**t.
Me: first of all, you will watch your language otherwise I will have you escorted off the property. Second, according to the paper work you just handed me, your reservation was for last week.
Customer: What?!! F**k you! I booked that room for tonight for 3 days, you guys must have screwed this up somehow!
At this point I am behind the desk pulling up her reservation in the system. I see that her room was in fact booked through a 3rd party website which meant that she not only paid in full but that she herself would have selected the dates. I see that she was a no show and that the 3rd party company paid us the no show fee.
Me: Ma’am, I’m very sorry to tell you this but you did in fact book your room for last week and you were a no show. If this happened during the winter when things are slower I might be able to make you a deal on a new room but I don’t even have one to offer you at full price. We are booked solid tonight and every night until the end of the month. I’m terribly sorry ma’am.
Customer:…what. did. You. SAY?! F**K YOU! You are not telling me this! I don’t want to hear this right now.
Me: Ma’am I’m…
Customer: NO! You guys screwed this up, I didn’t make a mistake! I booked that room for tonight! You guys messed this up somehow and if you won’t give me a room then you will give me my money back so that I can take my business elsewhere.
Me: This reservation was pre-paid and non cancellable so even if I wanted to refund your no show fee I couldn’t. We weren’t the ones who took your money, (3rd party company) did and they are far less flexible than we are. I’m sorry but you were a no show, you lost your reservation and as much as I would love to help you there are simply no options here. There are only 4 hotels in this area and they are all fully booked. The next closest one is (town nearly 3 hours away) and I’m fairly certain they will be fully booked too.
Customer: Are you kidding me?! I’m not going all that way for a bloody hotel room! How would I even get there? I came by plane, I didn’t drive! You’re going to pay for my taxi to get to (other town)
Me: Again, I would love to help you but you made a mistake. You booked your room for the wrong day and you missed your reservation. You selected the dates yourself, you confirmed them before submitting your payment and you even had the confirmation printed on paper in your own hands. I’m sorry but we haven’t done anything wrong in this situation and as much as I would like to help you there is no compensation I can provide. If you want to go to (next town) for a room I can absolutely make the arrangements for travel and accommodation but it will be at your expense. Otherwise you are welcome to take a cot free of charge and spend the night in one of our empty conference rooms until you make other arrangements.
Customer: This is bulls**t! I have never had such terrible customer service in my entire life! I someone books a room you are supposed to have one set aside for them for when they get here!
Me: Again ma’am, we DID have a rooms et aside for you, LAST WEEK when you reserved it. You didn’t show up!
Customer: How is it my problem that you don’t have a room for me tonight, hmm? Explain that to me.
Me: YOU booked the room on line. YOU selected the dates. YOU had the confirmation in your hands. YOU made the mistake.
Customer: I didn’t make a mistake! The damn website wouldn’t let me book for today, I kept getting a stupid error message, something about the hotel being closed. I called and the guy who answered said you never closed and that this is a 24 hour establishment so it must have been a mistake on your end. I had no choice but to change the date to last weeks date because that was the only way it would let my reservation go through.
Me: So you acknowledge that you selected those dates then?
Customer: Yes! Because it wouldn’t let me book for tonight but the intention was to be here TONIGHT!
Me: Ok, first of all ma’am when you get a message that the hotel is closed, that means that we are sold out and have closed our online booking so that people can’t reserve rooms that we don’t have. If the site doesn’t let you book for a certain day it’s because you can’t. Booking for another day will only guarantee you a room for the day you booked. You chose dates for last week, that was when your room was booked for. If you try to book a flight for tomorrow and the flight is sold out, do you think you could book a flight for next week and still get on the plain tomorrow?
Customer: Well of course not, that would be stupid.
As she says this a look of realization crosses her face and she gets really red and starts to cry.
Customer: I’m an idiot. I’m here for an important business meeting, we could lose these clients if I don’t rock this meeting and that could cost me my job! I’m already on thin ice here…I can’t even take another room elsewhere, this was paid by the company and I’m on a budget. Can I just take that cot like you offered then?
Me: Absolutely ma’am, and again I am terribly sorry that you have to go through all this.
She ended up sleeping in the conference room and left the next day. She wasn’t able to find other accommodations and the 3rd party company was not willing to reimburse her. She told me the next morning before leaving that the meeting was cancelled since she had nowhere to stay and that she would most likely be demoted upon returning to work. I felt bad but I hope she learns a lesson. We may have been closed on line but we physically had a couple rooms left on the day she booked. If she had at least called we could have booker her that room directly at the hotel but she chose to take a short cut.

(I live in a small Canadian town and the area is a well-known spot for touristic deer hunting, so it’s not unusual for us to have a number of American customers. I can tell this is the situation for one group of men that comes in one day; all are wearing full camouflage and have thick Southern accents.)

Customer: “You didn’t give me my change!”

Me: “Yes, I did.”

Customer: “You’re trying to rip me off, aren’t you?! You owe me two dollars change, and now you’re trying to convince me that this is two dollars! I know better than that! What are these gold things?!“

(He shoves his hand towards me… where he holds two loonies. I have a very hard time not taking my palm to my face.)

Me: *calmly* “That’s two dollars; in Canada, we have a loonie, which is a dollar coin instead of a dollar bill.”

(He said nothing and walked back to his table.)

(I work in a call center for a taxi company as a dispatcher, which means that in addition to taking customer calls, I handle complaints and deal with drivers directly. We often get calls from hotels for guests, and a small motel has just reopened under new management. The phone rings:)

Me: “Good afternoon, [Taxi Company]. May I start with your phone number?”

Customer: “Hi, I own [Motel] and I’m just calling to let you know I’m giving you all my business.”

Me: “Thank you; that’s very kind.”

Customer: “Remember my phone number; it’s very important. I’m very important and I will be calling you all the time. I’m going to be calling all the time for all my customers, so make sure to remember my number. It’s very important and you’ll get lots of good business.”

Me: “Thank you, sir; have a good day.”

(I can already tell this guy is crazy. That afternoon, he calls and one of my coworkers answers, and the guy screams at him for not already knowing who he was before ordering a cab for a guest. I find out later he called again soon afterward and was as happy as can be despite no difference in the calls, confirming my diagnosis of crazy. The next day, he calls again and wants to speak to a supervisor. The call is transferred to me.)

Me: “Hi, dispatch, how can I help you?”

Customer: “Hi, I’m [Customer], owner of [Motel].”

Me: “How can I help you, sir?”

Customer: “Last night, I ordered a taxi for [Female Customer].”

(I go through the system and find the order, assuming it’s about a lost phone or something.)

Me: “Yes, sir?”

Customer: “Okay, I want to know exactly where she went. I want to know what route they took, who met her there, any stops on the way, and I want that driver’s name and number so I can call him for details.”

Me: “Sir, I’m not allowed to discuss any of that with you.”

Customer: “I ORDERED THE CAB!”

Me: “Yes, sir, but it’s against the Privacy Act for me to discuss any information like that with anybody other than the actual customer.”

Customer: “THERE IS NO PRIVACY ACT! YOU TELL ME!”

Me: “No, sir, I’m not allowed to.”

Customer: “THERE IS NO PRIVACY ACT! I AM INDIAN! YOU TELL ME!”

Me: “It doesn’t matter what race you are, sir; it’s illegal for me to—”

Customer: “NO, IT ISN’T!”

Me: “Yes, it is.”

Customer: “FINE. I WILL NEVER CALL HERE AGAIN! YOU’VE LOST ALL MY BUSINESS! YOU’LL BE OUT OF BUSINESS WITHIN A WEEK!”

Me: “Have a good day, sir.”

(He ordered a few more cabs, but then stopped phoning. We never heard from the lady, so I hope she recognized his crazy and fled. I still don’t know what his race had to do with anything, or what he hoped to accomplish by just insisting the law didn’t exist.)

(I work at a diner. During the Saturday lunch rush, a customer in her 60s is wheeled in with her friend, though by her behaviour she acts more like a six-year-old. Right off the bat, I know she’s going to be trouble when I try to introduce myself and she just cuts me off by demanding coffee. The real trouble starts after I bring her meal. The second she sees her toast, she flips. She throws a tantrum about it being too toasted, so I assure her I’ll bring it back to the kitchen. Then, she throws a tantrum about it being too light, so I take it back again. Then, she complains about her meal getting cold because of all this, how this is the worst meal of her entire life, and how she’s never coming back here ever again. By the time she pays, I’m so sick of this woman, but I still try to be friendly.)

Me: “Have a nice day, ma’am.”

Customer: “I will.” *shoots me a smug look like she’s going to one-up me* “Once I’m out of here!”

Me: *with my best customer service smile on my face* “Me, too, ma’am. Me, too!”

(I’m a cashier in a grocery store. I’m very friendly and like to help out in any way that I can, though I’m bad at picking up on “hints” that people try to give without just asking for what they want. We’re often a bit short-staffed, and when people forget an item, the vast majority of the time they’ll run off and grab it themselves while I’m scanning their other things because it’s a lot faster than waiting for a clerk, though some are still worried about holding up the line behind them. A lady in her late 50s comes through my till.)

Me: “Hi there. Did you find everything you needed today?”

Customer: “Hi. Yeah.” *finishes putting her stuff on the belt* “Oh, I forgot mustard.”

Me: *cheerfully* “Well, did you want to grab it still? You’ve got lots of time while I scan this stuff, and it’s just right there!” *gestures to the aisle, which is maybe thirty feet away*

Customer: *a bit coolly* “No, it’s fine.”

(I figure she doesn’t need it that badly and will get it next time. I scan a few more things.)

Me: “So, how are you today?”

Customer: *in a suddenly very chilly voice* “Fine. I’d be a lot better if I had my mustard.”

Me: *responding to her tone* “Oh, er… Are you sure you don’t want to grab it? There’s not a line or anything; you’ve got lots of time!”

Customer: “No.” *glares pointedly at me*

Me: *finally catching on* “Oh, would you like me to call someone to get it for you?”

Customer: *loudly snapping at me* “THAT WOULD BE NICE.”

(Taken aback by her anger, I page a clerk to come over to my till. While we are waiting, I ask:)

Me: “Ah, so, what kind of mustard would you like? Regular, dijon, flavoured? We have dill, bacon, horseradish—”

Customer: *in the same snippy tone* “Just normal mustard.”

Me: “Okay, so just yellow mustard. What size? Just a small one, or large, or something in between?”

Customer: “I don’t know. Just a regular size! It’s just mustard!”

Me: “All right, ma’am, we have quite a few types; I just want to make sure he grabs the one you want.

(A second customer joins the line as the grocery clerk arrives. I relay the message to the clerk and he hurries off to the condiment aisle as I smile at the new customer and tell them it’ll just be an extra minute because he’s grabbing an item. By now, I’ve finished scanning all my current customer’s things and we’re waiting in awkward silence. I can feel the huffiness radiating from her and use the time to take a sip of water instead of looking in her direction. The clerk comes back a moment later with a medium-sized bottle of yellow mustard. I take it from him and am about to thank him when the customer makes a noise of disgust.)

Customer: *to the clerk* “I wanted Dijon mustard!”

(I know full-well she said “normal” mustard when I offered her Dijon as an option, but I hold my tongue and remain polite.)

Me: “Sorry, must’ve misheard you. Do you want the same size as this one?”

Customer: *grunts in what I assume is approval*

(I exchange a glance with the clerk, who sighs slightly, takes the bottle back, and runs off again.)

Customer: *yells loudly after the clerk, startling everyone now in line behind her* “Bring me a large one!”

(I’m trying to hold in my annoyance as she mutters to herself about incompetent workers, hoping my coworker will be fast so I can get this lady out of here. The second customer is eyeing my current one with a raised eyebrow and an unimpressed expression. Thankfully, the clerk returns quickly and hands over the new bottle.)

Me: “Is this the one you’re after?”

Customer: *rudely* “YES, finally.”

(I quickly scan and bag the item as the clerk scurries off, tell her the total, and let her put through her card. She is still being rude and huffy with me when I ask her for a rewards card or if she’d like carry-out service, so I say nothing more than I absolutely have to, still managing to keep my tone polite. Once she’s done with payment:)

Me: “All right, you have a good day.”

Customer: “Well, it would’ve been a terrible day if you hadn’t bothered to get me my mustard!”

(She gives a final sniff of annoyance and stalks off with a great deal of haughtiness. I try not to let the irritation show on my face as I turn to the next customer, who is watching the woman walk away with an incredulous look on their face.)

Next Customer: *rolling their eyes* “…or she could have just gotten it herself and spared everyone the hissy fit.”

(Or instead of being passive-aggressive, she could have just asked. I’d have been more than happy to call someone immediately if she’d just told me in the first place.)