(I work in an electronics store which is located inside a mall. there are signs on the mall’s exterior wall for the stores that are inside. The sign for our store, and for a sports store two stores down from us, are next to each other. A man comes into our store and looks around confused)

Customer: It’s *sports store* in here?

Me: Yes.

Customer: (looking further inside our store) Where? I don’t see it anywhere.

Me: Um, it’s two stores down.

Customer: What?

Me: It’s two stores down. It’s just past the hair place.

Customer: What?

Me: (pointing to the hall) it’s two stores down.

Customer: Oh I thought it was in here! You should change your sign outside! It looks like *sports store* is inside this store!

(After he leaves, a coworker comes up)

Corworker: He couldn’t just walk 20 feet down the hall, he had to come into the first store asking where it was?

Me: No, he thought it was IN OUR store

(I am with my husband. We are in a small town grabbing some quick supper on the way to the drive-in theater. We see a local coffee chain that sells food and figure that should work perfectly. We head into the drive-thru and notice that we have shown up about 45 minutes before close.)

Worker: “Hi! Welcome to [Coffee Place]. Just to let you know, as we are close to our closing time, we are not serving hot food anymore. We are still offering our sandwich menu.”

Husband: “No problem. Thanks for letting me know.”

Worker: “What can I get you?”

Husband: “Can I get a chicken salad sandwich and-–“

Worker: “Sorry, we’re out of chicken salad for the night.”

Husband: “Oh, okay. Um, a turkey bacon club, then?”

Worker: “Sorry, we’re out of bacon, as well.”

(We were starting to get a bit frustrated, but we realize that we did come close to closing, so assume we will just make the best of what they have left.)

Husband: “Okay, can I get two ham and cheddars, then?”

Worker: “Actually, we’re out of bread.”

Me: “What?! She can’t be serious.”

Husband: “So, how would I get a sandwich, then?”

Worker: “Um. I mean, we can give you the meat?”

(I start laughing hard, and my husband has this “Seriously?” look on his face.)

Husband: “So, you have no bread at all? No biscuits, English muffins, nothing?”

Worker: “Ah, no, not really. Did you still want the ham and cheddar?”

Husband: “No, thanks. I think we’ll try somewhere else.”

(We ended up grabbing food at a sub shop. It was pretty funny that the worker offered us sandwiches if they were completely out of bread! Probably would have been better off to close early if it was truly that bad!)

(My girlfriend and I are at a Pho restaurant, where they usually give us tea when we sit down. This time, they give us ice water. The waitress has an obvious accent, and it is clear English is not her first language.)

Girlfriend: “Actually, could we have some tea? Oh, is it complementary?”

Waitress: *deer in headlights look* “Um… pardon?”

Girlfriend: “Is it complementary?”

Waitress: *same uncomfortable expression* “Pardon?”

Girlfriend: “Is it complementary?”

Waitress: “Uh…”

Me: “Is it free?”

Waitress: “Oh! Yes! I just thought since it’s summer, you’d like a cold drink!”

Girlfriend: “Oh, yes, thank you. We just really like having your tea.”

(While you should never assume someone doesn’t understand the language, if they’re clearly having trouble with a certain word, repeating it over and over isn’t going to help. Best to rephrase and try again.)

(I am working in a different department than my usual one. It is a busy day, we have stock to put away, and one of the managers wants a few of us to move a few things around within the department. We are all busy working. A customer is shopping with his wife.)

Customer: *sighs, then shouts* “IS ANYONE GOING TO HELP ME?!”

Coworker: “Hi there. How can I help you today?”

Customer: “I need help finding a shirt to match these pants.”

(All of us stop what we are doing, and for about ten minutes, we help the other coworker find different options to pair with the pants. We probably find about ten different shirts. My coworker takes them up to the customer. The customer stands there going through everything.)

Customer: “No, no, no. Ugh, I guess I could try this one… No, no, no.”

(He picks all of the ones he wants to try and heads to the fitting room. I set him up in there with everything nicely folded on the bench. My manager then comes by and explains to us what he wants us to move and how he wanted us to set it all up. Meanwhile, the customer comes out of the fitting room with one of the shirts and the pants. All of my coworkers walk away and so does the manager. He proceeds to bring the items to the register.)

Me: “Hi there. How did everything go? I see you found something to pair with those pants. Are you ready to go or did you want to look around some more?”

Customer: *in a really rude voice* “I’m ready to go.”

Me: “Perfect.” *rings up all of the items* “It comes to $155; how would you like to pay?”

(The customer slides the chip into the machine while I fold and bag his clothes for him.)

Customer: “You know, I’m absolutely disgusted with the service here… I needed help and had to shout for it, and then you all were just standing around talking while I was trying things on.”

Me: “I’m sorry that you feel that way, sir.”

Customer: “It’s just disgusting. I expect better service from [Store]. You’re getting paid to be here; you should be working, not talking.”

Me: *losing my patience a bit* “Sir, we are just doing our job. There is a lot more to our job description aside from customer service, but all of us spent ten minutes looking for shirts for you to match those pants. We did our best.”

Customer: “I’m so disgusted. If your manager was here, I would love to tell him how you were all just standing around talking.”

Me: “Well, actually, our manager was standing there with us; again, we were discussing what needed to be moved around in the department, which is also in our job description, but if you would like me to call the manager down here, I can get him to explain it to you, as well.”

Customer: “No.”

(The customer gave me a dirty look, ripped the bag from my hand, and walked out of the store. I went into the fitting room to find every single shirt crumpled up in a ball on the floor.)

(I only eat strictly kosher food; this means that the only establishments I can eat at are kosher-certified. There are only a handful in the city and none are near my work. I am out for dinner with my coworkers at a non-kosher restaurant. Typically when this happens I bring my own meal in a bag and eat with them. I’ve been doing this for six years at many different restaurants, from small Somali joints to huge steakhouse franchises, and have never had an issue until now. There are eight of us at a burger/wings joint and I’m halfway through a deli sandwich when a manager comes up to me.)

Manager: “I’m really sorry, but we don’t allow any outside food here. We are a restaurant.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I can’t eat any of your food due to dietary restrictions.”

Manager: “We can try to accommodate your restrictions, but you are absolutely not allowed to have outside food. We usually have security stop people at the door.”

Me: “Are you a kosher-certified establishment?” *knowing they aren’t*

Manager: “I think we have some kosher food in the kitchen. I’ll go look.”

(I know this is impossible but he leaves before I can say anything. Throughout this my friends have been trying to argue with him asking why this is a big deal, as we’re here with a big group, and he has refused to move. I wait with my half-finished sandwich in my lap like a rebuked boy in school while my friends continue to eat. He comes back fifteen minutes later with another manager in tow.)

Manager #2: “Well, we don’t have kosher food in our kitchen, but you’re not allowed to eat outside food.”

(I’m ready to crawl under the table from embarrassment; I just wanted to sit with my friends and this has turned into a whole ordeal.)

Me: “What do you want me to do, exactly?”

Manager #2: “Well, we really don’t want anyone looking at you and thinking they can bring their own food. Can you eat your food off our plates?”

Me: “No, I’m sorry. The plates aren’t kosher.”

(They pause for thinking, while my friends continue to try to convince them to let it slide.)

Manager #2: “If we put a lining on top of the plate, could you eat it, then?”

Me: *not willing to argue any further* “Yes, I could.”

(I’d actually much rather prefer not to do this, as making it look like you’re eating non-kosher food is a no-no. But I just want this experience to end at this point. Another five minutes pass and they bring me a plate with a French fry liner on top of it. I put my sandwich and container of farfel — a Mediterranean dish — on it. Five minutes later the manager comes back AGAIN.)

Manager #2: “I’m sorry, but could you just empty your container out onto the plate? We really don’t want anyone thinking you’re eating outside food.”

(It was incredibly obvious to everyone at the table that this establishment served nothing like the food I was eating. Farfel is a bit messy, and all I had on me was a plastic fork since I’d assumed I’d be eating out of the container. I bit the bullet and dumped it out, and for the rest of the meal I held my container in my lap like it was contraband. The funny thing is that my company, which has 400 people, had come to this establishment in the past for a company event. We pretty much agreed that we would talk to the admin team to make sure that never happened again.)