Still Has Blind Faith In People

, , , , , , | Friendly | June 21, 2018

I regularly go to a local park to walk my dogs. I stumble and fall on the grass.

There are few people about. I am aware of someone passing me, but he doesn’t stop.

As I get up I see a man about twenty yards away apparently staring at me, but he makes no move towards me at all.

I am hurting. It isn’t bad, but I am surprised that two people have ignored me as I am a woman over 50 and therefore more likely to have people ask me if I am okay in such a situation.

However, as I observe them, it becomes clear that the man who passed me as I fell is very small of build and has significant cerebral palsy. The man further off was not staring at me at all, as he is blind. “What are the chances?!” I thought.

Acting Like The First Three Letters From “Assume”

, , , , , | Friendly | June 20, 2018

(I’m walking my dog in the park, when I get hit in the back of my head. I turn around.)

Woman: “NEVER ASSUME, YOU BI— Oh, wrong person.”

(She then trots away like nothing happened. I am standing there in shock of the spontaneous attack.)

Me: “Did she just assume I was someone else, and then yell at me for assuming?”

Not Seeing Eye To Eye

, , , , , , | Friendly | June 5, 2018

(I have heterochromia, which means I have two different colored eyes. My left one is blue and my right one is brown/hazel. I’ve had many people comment on them, good and bad. Example #1: I’m taking pictures of the wildlife in the park for a school project. We’re taking a break and decide to make small talk.)

Me: “I like your bracelet.”

Partner: “Thanks, it was a birthday gift.”

Me: “Lucky.”

Partner: “Have you ever considered surgery to make both your eyes the same color?”

Me: “Does something like that exist?”

Partner: “Yeah. My aunt hates contacts but loves blue eyes.”

Me: “Unless it’s glaucoma or vision correction, I don’t feel comfortable going through expensive eye surgery.”

Partner: “But you’d look normal!”

Me: “My definition of normal and yours seem to be at different ends of the spectrum.”

(Example #2: Same park, weekend, I’m painting the pond.)

Mother: “Go on. Ask her, sweetie.”

Little Girl: “Excuse me, miss?”

Me: “Yes?”

Little Girl: “Are you a witch? Your eyes are odd.”

Me: “Shhh. If my father hears someone figured out my secret, he might give me twice my magic homework.”

Little Girl: “I promise I won’t tell.” *makes a “my lips are sealed” gesture and skips happily to her mother*

Pokémon Red And Black

, , , , , | Friendly | May 6, 2018

(I crocheted a Pokémon. The pattern is complicated, due to the Pokémon having a weird shape and lots of little pieces that need to be made and sewed on. I also made a major mistake, didn’t realize it until several rounds later, and had to undo half of it to fix it, so once it’s finally finished I’m quite proud of it. I show it off to my friends.)

Friend: “Oh, wow! You made a Lugia!”

Me: “Yep. It took me forever to work on that. I think I was working on it off and on for most of this week.”

Friend: “Can I have it?”

Me: “I beg your pardon?”

Friend: “Can I have it? It’s nice. I want one.”

Me: “I made that because I wanted it, and no, you can’t just have it for free.”

Friend: “Why not? Can’t you just make another one?”

Me: “Did you miss the part where I said I worked on it for about a week?”

Friend: “So, can I buy one, then?”

Me: “Sure, but it might take me a while to do it, because I don’t feel like crocheting another complicated pattern so soon, and it’ll cost you $100.”

Friend: “$100? It’s not worth that much!”

Me: “Trust me, you’re probably getting this for a lot less than it’s worth.”

Friend: “I’ll give you $20 for it.”

Me: “I am not taking $20 for something that took that much time and effort to make.”

(He argues with me back and forth, raising his offer to a “generous” $30, when finally I get fed up and pull out my phone calculator and a piece of paper.)

Me: “Okay, since you don’t seem to understand this, how about we break it down and calculate the worth? First, the yarn that went into making it. I used the majority of a brand-new skein of white yarn that cost me about $3. The rest of the yarn for the blue bits was probably about a dollar’s worth, and the Fiberfill used is probably about a dollar’s worth at most, too.”

Friend: “Okay, so that’s only about $5. Nowhere near $100.”

Me: “I’m not done. It’s not just the material that went into making it; you also have to factor in the time spent on it. I don’t have an exact estimate of how long I worked on this, but let’s say about five hours a day for five days. That seems about right.”

Friend: “So, 25 hours altogether?”

Me: “Right. Now, the minimum wage in Pennsylvania is $7.25 an hour, so multiply that by 25, and that’s $181.25, plus the $5 for materials, which brings your total for the Pokémon amigurumi up to $186.25. I expect that all in cash, and I don’t take payment until it’s done for people I know personally, so you’ll have some time to save up.”

Friend: “Uh… What else can you make?”

(I ended up making him a Charmander,  and charged him $20 for it because it was a lot easier and less time-consuming. Let’s hope he learned something and doesn’t pull this again with me or someone else.)

“Changing” Their Tone Pretty Quickly

, , , , , | Working | April 10, 2018

(When I am in the fifth grade, we take a class trip to an alligator park. I find a few little knick-knacks that I like at the gift shop and take them to the register.)

Cashier: “Your total is $5.35, please.”

(I pull a ten-dollar bill and 35 cents out of my pocket and try to give them to her.)

Cashier: *smiling* “I just need the $10, honey.”

(She tries to take just the $10, but I don’t let go.)

Me: “But I want $5 back, so you need to take the change, too, please.”

Cashier: *condescendingly* “Sweetie, I only need the $10.”

Me: *sighs* “Ma’am, I’m trying to get back $5, because I’ve already got a bunch of change in my pocket and don’t want more.”

Cashier: *loudly* “And I said I only need the $10, you stupid brat! $5.35 is less than $10!”

(My teacher, who has been looking at a nearby display, rushes over at the cashier’s sudden hostility.)

Teacher: “[My Name], what’s going on here?”

Cashier: *glaring at me* “This stupid kid can’t do math, that’s what!”

(My teacher ignores her and asks me again.)

Me: “I have a bunch of change and didn’t want more, so I tried to give her $10.35 to pay for my stuff, and she keeps saying she only needs the $10. I just want a $5 back.”

Teacher: *sighs* “Is that all?” *to the cashier*You are the one who can’t do math. She’s trying to give you $10.35 so that she can get back a five-dollar bill. What part of that don’t you understand?”

Cashier: *scoffs* “Whatever.”

(She finally cashed out my transaction, and I got my $5 bill and went back out into the park area. My teacher spoke to the cashier’s manager. I never went back, but apparently the manager later called my teacher to say the girl had been fired.)

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