(I’ve come in for a job interview. The manager seems to like me and keeps asking me questions for 20 minutes, even though I don’t have previous experience in the job. The interview is wrapping up, and I feel like it’s gone pretty well.)

Manager: “Well, unfortunately, I’ve received an application from someone with previous experience doing this exact sort of work, and for that reason, he’s more qualified for the position. But if the other person hadn’t applied, I would definitely have hired you; I feel you could perform this job very well.”

Me: *upset, but plastering on a smile as best I can* “Oh. Well, thank you, anyway. Would it be possible for you to keep my resume on file, in case an opening comes up?”

Manager: “Oh, yes, of course.”

Me: “Thanks. I appreciate it.”

(We shake hands, and I get up and head for the door.)

Manager: “You know, if you manage to get experience somewhere else, please do feel free to come back and apply again.”

(I wish I had just smiled and given her a polite promise to do just that, but I was so surprised by her gall that I ended up making an involuntary, “Are you kidding me?” face, instead.)

(I am a teenager fresh out of school. I need some money but don’t have much work experience, so I apply for several retail and entry-level jobs. I get a few interviews, including one at a well-known retail chain, [Store]. The interview goes well, and I am told I’ll hear from them within the week. In the meantime, I continue going on interviews, and about two weeks later I accept a job in another field. Two full months after my interview at [Store], I get the following phone call:)

HR Representative: “Hi, this is [HR Representative] from [Store], calling for [My Name]. We just wanted to let you know that your first shift is on Monday, so we need you to come in and fill out some paperwork before then.”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry. It’s been so long since the interview, and I hadn’t heard anything, so I accepted another position. I appreciate your call, but I’m afraid I won’t be able to work with you.”

HR Representative: “But you filled out an application and said you wanted a job.”

Me: “Yes, I did. But my interview was two months ago, and no one from [Store] ever contacted me to offer me a job, or to tell me that I was in line for one. Your call is the first contact I’ve had. I applied several places and have accepted a position in another field. I really needed a job, you see, so I took one when it was offered.”

HR Representative: “Well, we’re really short-staffed, so we need you to start on Monday.”

Me: “Again, I’m sorry, but I really can’t. The job I’ve accepted is full-time, Monday to Friday, so I really wouldn’t be available for anything beyond occasional part-time work.”

HR Representative: “But we need you on Monday.”

Me: *pause* “…and I’m very sorry, but I am not available.”

HR Representative: “You shouldn’t lie on your application. If you say you want a job, you should take it when it’s offered.”

Me: “That’s exactly what I did.”

(We are hiring for a few management positions and have signs placed in the window. I receive this email from a potential applicant. I have changed the email address to a similar one, for the sake of privacy.)

Email:

“To: [work email]
From: RadRoosterXOXO@[site].com
Subject: Hire Me
Body: Hey send me info on how to get the job I am the best fit.”

(That’s it. No name or anything. I was tempted to respond, “Dear Mr./Ms. RoosterXOXO.”)

(A customer comes to the service desk in regards to an application he filed a week earlier.)

Me: “Hi, how can I assist you today?”

Customer: “I applied for a job about a week ago, and I’m very interested. I was just wondering if I could leave my information with you guys.”

Me: “Sure.”

(I hand him a clipboard with some papers on it, and he writes down his info.)

Me: “Okay, I’ll give this to our hiring manager; she’ll be in later today.”

Customer: “Thanks.” *begins walking towards up escalator*

Me: “Sir, the exits are over there.” *points in completely opposite direction*

Customer: “Oh.”

(He walked to the bathroom, then checked to see if I was still watching, eventually leaving when he realized I was. I wrote on the note to the manager that he tried to sneak into a movie without a ticket. When she read it, she laughed hysterically and said, “Now I can use this to make sure we don’t hire him!”)

I recently graduated from college and am looking for a job. I hear of an opportunity for management training at a grocery store in my hometown. There are only three things listed for requirements: you have to be at least 18, you have to have a high school diploma, and some management experience may be necessary. There are no other requirements listed anywhere, not even on the website. I’m skeptical, but since I graduated with a degree in Business Administration: Finance, and I meet all the requirements, I think that I might have a shot. I even have a little bit of leadership experience from volunteer work I’ve done while in college.

I get to the interview and say that I am interested in the management training program. I am told that in order to get in, I need at least ten years of management experience. I ask about a lower-paying job as a shift supervisor. That job requires five years of management experience.

I am left wondering who approved of that job description and where they got their education.