They’re Not Bready For This

, , , , , , | Working | February 15, 2019

(I am with my husband. We are in a small town grabbing some quick supper on the way to the drive-in theater. We see a local coffee chain that sells food and figure that should work perfectly. We head into the drive-thru and notice that we have shown up about 45 minutes before close.)

Worker: “Hi! Welcome to [Coffee Place]. Just to let you know, as we are close to our closing time, we are not serving hot food anymore. We are still offering our sandwich menu.”

Husband: “No problem. Thanks for letting me know.”

Worker: “What can I get you?”

Husband: “Can I get a chicken salad sandwich and-–“

Worker: “Sorry, we’re out of chicken salad for the night.”

Husband: “Oh, okay. Um, a turkey bacon club, then?”

Worker: “Sorry, we’re out of bacon, as well.”

(We were starting to get a bit frustrated, but we realize that we did come close to closing, so assume we will just make the best of what they have left.)

Husband: “Okay, can I get two ham and cheddars, then?”

Worker: “Actually, we’re out of bread.”

Me: “What?! She can’t be serious.”

Husband: “So, how would I get a sandwich, then?”

Worker: “Um. I mean, we can give you the meat?”

(I start laughing hard, and my husband has this “Seriously?” look on his face.)

Husband: “So, you have no bread at all? No biscuits, English muffins, nothing?”

Worker: “Ah, no, not really. Did you still want the ham and cheddar?”

Husband: “No, thanks. I think we’ll try somewhere else.”

(We ended up grabbing food at a sub shop. It was pretty funny that the worker offered us sandwiches if they were completely out of bread! Probably would have been better off to close early if it was truly that bad!)

OCD = Obviously Completely Deceiving

, , , | Working | February 12, 2019

(To keep our counters clear for serving customers, staff usually put stock into baskets on the floor behind our counter. Whenever staff leave the counter area, they are supposed to take some of the items with them, but when we get busy it’s not an easy thing to do, and the baskets often overflow; we need to get it cleared by the end of the day.)

Coworker: “Oh, look at this mess. I have OCD and this is annoying me.” *starts picking up the stock*

(As part of my supervising role, I am trying to get closing chores done and am happy that she’s taken her own initiative and I haven’t had to ask her to do it. It’s still half an hour before we close, plenty of time to get most of the baskets empty.)

Me: “Great, I’ll leave you to clearing that stuff out. I’ll get on with this and I’ll deal with any customers at the far counter. I don’t want to have to stay back tonight.”

Coworker: “Don’t worry; I’ll have all the stuff cleared off the floor.”

(I get stuck into my work and keep on with the customers. From the corner of my eye I see coworker sitting on the now cleared floor, next to the empty baskets.)

Me: “What’s wrong?”

Coworker: “After doing all this, I’m tired. Doesn’t it look better here? Now my OCD can relax.”

Me: “Yes, it does, but you can’t just sit there; you’re right under a camera.”

Coworker: “Oh, okay.” *looks at her watch* “Oh, it’s closing time. Bye.” *starts to walk off*

Me: “Could you close the door? I need to finish with this customer and do a quick walk around to make sure there’s no one else in the store.”

Coworker: *all but rolls her eyes and goes to shut the door* “My dad will be waiting.”

Me: “I still need you to check the store on your way to get your bag.”

(She had to walk through the store, anyway. By the time I got finished with the sale and showed the customer out, my coworker had collected her bag, told me the store was clear, and left. I was happy that all I had to do was finalise the till I was working on and do the banking. I finalised the till and walked down towards the counter she had been working at and noticed that all she had done was dump everything from the baskets onto the countertop. There was no way I could leave it like that and had to stay back after all of my tasks were completed.)

Please Recycle The Law

, , , , , , | Working | February 8, 2019

It was the mid-1990s and our law office was transitioning from research in books to computer research. With law books now available on CDs, we could free up our office library for useful office space. We went through a room full of books and decided which few books the attorneys wanted to keep and identified the remainder to be recycled. After ascertaining that there were no schools or anyone else who wanted them, we stacked them in a corner and asked the cleaning crew to remove them with the other paper recycling. We understood that it was a big job, which we didn’t expect them to accomplish in one night, but we thought if they would take even just a few books out with them each night, we would eventually have the office space free.

After the first night or two, a few books disappeared, but the rest of the large pile remained there day after day, in spite of the “recycle” tag that reminded the cleaning crew to remove them. After a couple of weeks had gone by and the large pile of books was still there, I added a second note alongside the “recycle” sign. It read, “Please remove these books or we’ll make you read them.” Every book was gone the next morning.

Stop! Or We’ll Stare Disapprovingly!

, , , , , , | Working | February 7, 2019

(We’re going through a busy spell at self-check, so my coworker and I manning the area are both running back and forth between customers while trying to keep an eye on all of them to prevent theft. Two men at a register have one item, but it’s from electronics and has an anti-theft tag, which they flag me down to remove. The policy is to remove it after they have asked and you see that it’s scanned. If they ask before they pay, you’re not supposed to argue or make them wait, just remove the tag as long as it’s been scanned. I have to help another customer, but the men have been at the register a while, and since I just finished helping that customer and my coworker is busy with a different customer, I go to check on them. Just as I get there…)

Me: “Is everything–”

Customer #1: *storms off, completely ignoring me*

Customer #2: *sheepishly smiles at me and starts to follow his friend*

(I look down and see their item still sitting on the bagging platform. Before I can do anything:)

Customer #1: *abruptly turns around, snatches the item off the platform, and storms back off*

Me: “Have a nice day?”

(As I say this, I’m glancing towards the register, having found it very odd that they would only purchase one item and then almost forget to take it. Sure enough, there’s a message on the card reader showing that their card was declined a couple times. I rush after them. As a cashier, I’m not allowed to go after customers myself.)

Me: “Security, that really tall guy by the door: theft!”

(Even though we’re a high-crime area, I guess due to violent reactions, security cannot actually detain anybody, nor can they follow them outside. All they can do is ask somebody to stop and see their receipt or turn over an item. The two men are almost to the door, so I am rushing, trying to get the guard to move quickly before they leave and there’s nothing more we can do.)

Security: *slowly scanning* “Those two?”

Me: “Yes, yes, the tall man in the brown jacket with the short man in the gray sweatshirt.”

Security: *finally starts after them, then quietly asks* “Sir? Sir, please?”

Customer #1: *continues walking at brusque pace and pays the guard absolutely no attention, walking right out of the store, his friend right behind him*

Security: *turns back to me and shrugs*

Me: “…”

(I just walk back to self-checkout. I’ve only been working a month or so and have not dealt with blatant theft like that before, so I catch my coworker, who is regularly stationed at self-check, tell her what happened, and ask what to do. She comes over to look at the register they left, which, fortunately, other customers have left alone.)

Coworker: “That’s a hundred-dollar item!”

Me: “I know; it sucks.”

Coworker: “And they just walked off with it… D***.”

(She printed out a receipt of the transaction thus far so she could take it to down to customer service where there’s usually a manager and give it to them to log. I later made sure to confirm with a manager that we couldn’t wait until after a transaction was finished to take off anti-theft tags if asked. I explained why I was asking, and the manager just shrugged and told me, yeah, remove the tag when asked. It just needs to be scanned first. I don’t particularly care because it’s a huge corporate business that pays their employees dirt, but it’s kind of a silly policy, though no more so than our security guards being there just for show.)

Lazy Cartographers

, , , | Right | February 7, 2019

(More than once, when I’ve gone up to the front of the store to grab a cart because I need it, a customer will immediately come up behind me and ask this question:)

Customer: “Can I have that cart?”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I need it.”

(Believe it or not, employees also need to use the shopping carts at times. We are not pulling out the cart because we saw you enter the store and know you’re too lazy to walk two feet to get your own cart.)

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