Not A Good Tempura-ture

, , , , , , , | Working | August 18, 2018

I ordered some food from a popular food delivery service. They gave me an ETA of 1:21 pm. By 1:45 pm I hadn’t received anything, so I messaged the company via the app requesting an update. They told me the driver had left and my food should arrive any minute. Still nothing at 2:00 pm, but the delivery service called me to check in. The rep said the restaurant was saying the driver delivered my food at 12:47 pm.

I told them no, that I’d been home and no one had knocked or rung the doorbell. The rep was adamant that my food had been delivered, so I checked my front porch. Sure enough, the driver had left my raw fish on my front porch in 80-degree weather!

Apparently, the driver swore he handed my food over to an actual person, but seeing as how I was home alone, that does not check out.

The restaurant demanded I return the food in order to get a refund. They clearly didn’t believe me, so I hope they saw how soggy my tempura was and how questionable the shrimp had become!

You Know, Gary, With The Name!

, , , , | Right | August 17, 2018

Me: “Thank you for calling the helpdesk. This is [My Name]. How may I help you?”

Customer: “Could you please transfer me to Gary?”

(The company I work for employs over 50,000 people. Not to mention, I am not the operator; I do tech support.)

Me: “Do you have Gary’s last name?”

Customer: “No. He’s just the guy who always helps me.”

Me: “Well, I have multiple Garys, and I can’t really transfer you without knowing his last name.”

Customer: “Fine. Then just transfer me to Dawn!”

Me: *facepalm*

Can’t Filter Through The Filters

, , , | Right | August 16, 2018

(A customer approaches the counter.)

Customer: “I’m looking for an oil filter; can you help me?”

Me: “No problem. What type are you looking for?”

Customer: “I told you, I need an oil filter.”

Me: “Yes, but what size are you looking for? We have dozens of different types.”

Customer: “Oh, I didn’t know there were different sizes.”

Me: “That’s okay. I’ll just look it up in the catalog. What type of car is it?”

Customer: “It’s a Toyota.”

Me: *getting frustrated* “Okay, what type of Toyota?”

Customer: “I can’t remember.”

Me: “I’m afraid I can’t help you.”

Has No Heart For Your Condition

, , , , | Healthy | August 15, 2018

(My father was recently diagnosed with a genetic heart condition, and his doctors want all of his children to be checked for the condition. I make an appointment with my doctor so I can get a referral to a cardiologist.)

Doctor: “What are you here for today?”

Me: “My father was just diagnosed with [heart condition], and his doctors have ordered all of his kids to be tested for it. I just need a referral to a cardiologist.”

Doctor: “You’re way too young to be worrying about that. A heart condition wouldn’t affect you right now.”

Me: *initially speechless* “Well, I’d rather get the tests done so it isn’t a problem later.”

Doctor: “As I said, you’re too young. I’ll see you back in a few months for your annual.”

(The doctor left. Needless to say, that doctor did not see me back again. When the practice asked why I was attempting to switch doctors — something they usually don’t allow — I happily told them the whole story and requested that it be put on the doctor’s file as an official complaint. I eventually got the referral and did not have the genetic condition, but they did find a minor issue that just needed to be noted and checked every few years.)

Mommy’s Little Dearest Gets His Rewards

, , , , , , | Working | August 15, 2018

I work at a busy gas station off the highway. It is a Friday afternoon, and I am paired with one of the worst coworkers ever: a mama’s boy who whines about everything.  

This afternoon, the whole station is filled with people wanting to get gas, beer, pop, and whatever else they need to start their weekend. I am on the main terminal, moving the line along. My coworker is talking on the phone with his mom, being slow and rude, asking me to help him out. I finally get tired of it and excuse myself to go in the back, where our boss is sitting in the office. I complain a bit about the coworker. After, I tell the boss that I should get back out there. He tells me to stay in the back for a few more minutes, which I gladly do.

After a few more minutes, I go back out to the glare of my coworker, and get the store cleared out. He is still talking to his mother.  

A week or so later, he gets a delivery through the regional office. It is a “secret shopper’s” report, from that afternoon! Long story short: he no longer has a job.  

He threatens to sue for “defamation of character,” which probably won’t go far.

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