Laughter Really Is The Best Medicine

, , , , , | Related | December 9, 2018

(At Thanksgiving dinner, my Grandma, age 102, and Granny, 93, are talking about their medical alert buttons.)

Grandma: “I’ll show you mine if you show me yours.” *giggles*

(They pull out their necklaces and compare.)

Granny: “Yours is bigger than mine.”

(They both broke down giggling until they were red in the face.)

Giving Them A Hard Pill To Swallow

, , , , | Right | December 8, 2018

(I work at a retail pharmacy. I get a call from a patient.)

Customer: “I just came by the drive-thru, and you f****** idiots screwed up my prescription. This is completely wrong!

(I apologize profusely and confirm the medication she was supposed to pick up.)

Me: “You certainly did pick up the correct medication for yourself. What exactly was wrong with it?”

Customer: “Last time I got ninety pills, and this time I only got thirty! What kind of business are you running here?!”

Me: “I’m sorry, that is a bit peculiar. Let me see why that was done.”

(I look up her prescription, which is a quantity of thirty with three refills.)

Me: “I see your doctor only prescribed a total of a hundred and twenty pills. On your preferences, you request ninety-day supplies. We did indeed fill it for ninety days previously, meaning only thirty were remaining on your prescription, which is what you received today. After this, you will need a new prescription from your doctor in order to get a ninety-day supply. I’m sorry for the confusion.”

Customer: “No f****** way. You guys f****** shorted me. I’m going over soon, and you guys had better give me my d*** pills. I know you offer that service, since y’all are f****** useless.”

Me: “Ma’am, we did not short you. You were meant to get thirty pills. You don’t have enough pills on your prescription to fill for ninety. I can send a refill request fax to your doctor, and perhaps she can approve for more. If it’s within seven days, we can reimburse you and get you ninety days when it’s approved.”

Customer: *scoffs* “Seriously?! What the f*** am I supposed to do without my medication?! I need this stuff to live. Just give me my f****** pills.”

(I am going around in circles, so I cut her off.)

Me: “No. I’m sorry, I cannot invent a new prescription and give you pills you do not have. You have no refills. Zero. You have thirty days’ worth you just picked up, and thirty entire days to get more. I can get you my pharmacy manager if you want a second opinion.”

(I put her on hold before she could protest or swear at me anymore, and the pharmacist who had been listening to her in disbelief picked up the call. The customer hung up, and we thankfully haven’t heard from her since.)

Unfiltered Story #131635

, , | Unfiltered | December 7, 2018

When I was 17 I worked at a barbecue restraunt chain well known in texas, I was at the register when a customer walks in

Me: hey how’s it goin?
Customer: good *looks at minute for a good minute*
So uh…do you guys have like, nachos?
Me:…..sir, this is a bbq restraunt…
Customer:oh…..how about bbq nachos?
Me:…..no
He then looks around and then leaves.

The Customer Hanging Up Is The Cherry On Top

, , , , , | Right | December 6, 2018

(I work at an inbound call center. I have been doing the same job for years and have never received a complaint like this one.)

Me: “You’ve reached [Department]. My name is [My Name]. Please be advised that this call is recorded.”

Caller: “Good!”

Me: “How can I help you today?”

Caller: “That other agent I talked to, I couldn’t understand a word she said. It sounded like she was talking with a candy bar in her mouth. Couldn’t understand a word.”

Me: “I’m terribly sorry about that, sir. I’ll be sure to forward that information on, but in the meantime, if at any point you aren’t able to understand me just let me know. How can I assist you today?”

(The caller goes on to explain a problem that I am unable to resolve in my department, so I inform him that I will need to reach out to a different department to address his concerns, only to have him suddenly cut me off, yelling.)

Caller: “I can’t understand any of you! You’re all eating f****** desserts! Just forget it!” *click*

(I can’t speak for the first person he spoke to, but I certainly wasn’t eating anything… though that call made me want some sweets!)

A Cup Of Mary With Your Cup Of Joe

, , , , | Right | December 6, 2018

(I’m taking the order of a woman talking on her cell when this exchange occurs.)

Customer: “Grande mocha, whole milk.” *goes back to talking on her phone*

Me: “Whipped cream on that?”

Customer: “Mary.”

Me: “Would you like whipped cream, ma’am?”

Customer: “Mary!”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, would you—”

Customer: “M… A… R… “

Me:Mary! Would you like whipped cream?!

Customer: “Oh… Yeah.”

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