Applicants Who Don’t Apply Themselves

(My employee gets a contract for a project that needs about a dozen people. Since the physical office is very small, we decide to hire people who could work from home after receiving a short training session. We put up a job ad stating that is remote, full-time work, and I am told to screen the applicants through phone interviews.)

Applicant #1: “I don’t have a computer, so I’ll have to come to your office to work.”

Me: “We don’t have anywhere to put you. That is why we are only hiring for stay-at-home positions.”

Applicant #1: “But I don’t own a computer, so I’ll just come into the office.”

(Next:)

Applicant #2: “I can’t do full-time, so I’ll be working twenty hours and my girlfriend will do the other twenty.”

(Next:)

Applicant #3: “I’ve applied to your company before and I didn’t like the guy who interviewed me.”

Me: “He is not part of this project.”

Applicant #3: *rants about how much he hated my coworker*

(Next:)

Applicant #4: “I don’t have a computer, so is it okay if I go to my buddy’s house and use his?”

Me: “That is fine with me, but are you sure your friend doesn’t mind you being in his house all day?”

Applicant #4: “I’ll ask him and call you back.”

(He didn’t call back.)

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