Jerry’s In Hiding

, , , , , | Right | September 24, 2020

I’m a receptionist at a day spa and salon. Answering phones is my main job. Here is a little lovely that I got.

Me: “Thank you for calling [Salon and Spa]; how may I help you?”


Me: “Excuse me?”


Me: “Ma’am?”


Me: “MA’AM!”


Me: “MA’AM! This is a hair salon.”

Caller: “This isn’t Jerry’s Automotive?”

Me: “No.”

Caller: *Click*

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Unfiltered Story #213501

, , | Unfiltered | September 24, 2020

I work at Korean/Japanese fusion restaurant. We have two items on the menu that end with ‘katsu’, though they’re two different meats.

Customer: “I’ll take the number one.”

Me: “That has two choices of meat, what would you like?”

Customer: “I’ll have the chicken and… what’s that?” *points to chicken katsu*

Me: “That’s a fried chicken cutlet, and tonkatsu is a fried pork cutlet.”

Customer: “Okay I’ll have the chicken and the katsu.”

He’s finished speaking and after a beat I realise he’s not going to specify which kind.

Me: “…which one?”

Customer: “The CHICKEN katsu.”

The transaction finishes normally (honestly I was surprised he didn’t throw his money on the counter with his attitude) but my goodness, if you can’t specify what you want don’t be prissy when you have to clarify afterwards. Service workers aren’t mind readers!

Hell Hath No Fury Like A Homewrecker Scorned

, , , , , | Working | September 21, 2020

I’m a teller at a bank. It’s near closing, and I’m working with one coworker, who I don’t like because she’s an aggressive flirt, and one manager is in his office seeing to paperwork. I see a customer come in and my coworker sneers at him and walks off.

When he gets up to my counter, the customer tells me he hasn’t been able to access his account. I look it up and see that his account was recently locked on one of the days I wasn’t working and is now pending closure, with a note that it was for being aggressive and threatening to shoot the teller — the other coworker — which got him removed from the premises.

I inform him of this fact and tell him to leave before he sets off again or decides to act on his threat and I have to hit the panic button, only for him to react in shock and panic and actually start crying. He has no idea what I am talking about and seems terrified of being arrested for something he seems to not remember doing. I’m not sure what to do at this point, so I tell him gently to leave and I’ll review the case.

After he obliges and departs, I ping my manager to come up and my coworker walks back up to the counters.

Coworker: “Is he gone? Did you threaten to call the cops on him?”

Me: “I was about to, but he seemed to have no idea what he was talking about. The poor guy walked off crying and terrified.”

Coworker: *Smugly* “Good. That’s what he gets for snubbing me.”

Me: “What?”

The manager walks up just in time to hear that sentence and looks at my coworker. Something about that comment seems off to him, too, so he goes to his office to review the video footage of the day and time the note said he made the threat.

An hour later, he calls my coworker into the office with him and she pales. She leaves about half an hour later in tears.

Me: “What’s going on?”

With very visible annoyance, he grabs [Coworker]’s nameplate off the desk and chucks it into the garbage.

Manager: “[Coworker] tried flirting with [Customer], but he’s married so he turned her down. Apparently, she was so offended by this that she fabricated this story to ruin his life by getting his finances locked out! The police weren’t even called, and it all happened silently! [Manager #2] was working with her so I need to do some looking into this. You got things covered?”

I nodded and went back to work until closing. Over the next couple of days, I got to watch a domino effect; [Manager #2] was having “after-hours involvement” with my now-ex-coworker, so he corroborated her fake story and allowed her to make the note because she had him wrapped around her little finger.

When my manager called to set things straight with the customer, he was, rightfully, less than generous because his rent situation was uncertain and we could have gotten him and his family kicked out onto the street, and it resulted in us being sued for wrongful termination of a contract, among other charges of financial and emotional damage. Naturally, he also zeroed out his account with us and went to find another bank.

I do have to give credit where it’s due, though; when word of all of this reached the bank owner, he fired [Manager #2] on the spot, gave a huge payout to the customer as an apology for his hardships when he was approached by his lawyers — more than his lawsuit was asking for in damages, even — and set out to see if there was any legal retribution he could advise the customer to take on my ex-coworker and ex-manager for their petty revenge scheme.

At the time of writing this, that hasn’t borne any fruit just yet.

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Karen Cannot Abide Law Breaking… Wait…

, , , , , | Friendly | September 21, 2020

My wife and I only own one car and she has a longer commute. There is a bus that goes past my house and my work so she takes the car while I take the bus.

Everything is fine until we need to get something from [Retailer] for my work. The only one who can be spared to go is me but not having a car is mildly problematic. The simple solution is for my friend and coworker to loan me his car for the quick schlep.

My friend is disabled and, as such, has disabled plates on his car.

Since I am not disabled, I do not park in the handicapped spaces. In fact, as it’s near Christmas and it’s a very full lot, I park at the very end of one of the last rows. There’s the main road, a secondary road that has some fast food eateries, and then the parking lot for Walmart. I am literally parked so far away that if I were to move to the next furthest space, I would be parked in a fast food place.

As I’m getting out of the car, I attract the attention of a nosy Karen who takes offence to the fact that I’m in a car with disabled plates but don’t seem to need them.

She confronts me and I try to explain that I’m not abusing the plates since I’m not using them to park in the handicapped spaces. She won’t listen, so I blow her off and go to pick up our order.

Fifteen minutes later, I’m walking out and I see in the distance that she’s still there. A police cruiser pulls onto the secondary road and Karen starts jumping up and down waving her arms as if to flag them down.

She does. The officer steps out of his car and they begin to chat. Karen sees me and points to me and my clearly not-disabled stride towards the car. The officer looks at me and looks at the car, and with a look of exasperation, speaks to me.

Officer: “I can guess what you’re about to say but I need to ask. Can you explain the plates?”

Me: “I needed a car; my friend loaned me his. He’s disabled and I am not, so I parked here away from the handicapped spots.”

Officer: *Nodding* “Close. I was expecting you to say, ‘Wife’s car,’ but that’s good enough for me. You can go about your business.”

Karen started screeching at the officer and I drove off.

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A Taxing Customer, Part 3

, , , | Right | September 17, 2020

A cashier calls for an available manager to the register. I’m one of the three available managers on duty, so I walk up and ask what I can help with.

Cashier: “We have, um, a little problem.”

Customer: “No, we don’t. He just doesn’t understand, and you probably won’t, either, that I don’t have to pay tax because of agricultural reasons.”

Me: “Yes, sir, I understand. Do you have a tax-exempt account with us? If not, we can set you up if you have a tax ID number with you.”

Customer: “No, I don’t have to have any of that. I don’t have to pay tax.”

Me: “In order to set you up—”

Customer: “You must not be a manager, then; get me a real f****** manager.”

Me: “Okay, sir, I will get my store manager; she will tell you the same thing—”

Customer: “No, you’re just a liar. You’re not a f****** manager.”

Me: “Okay, I’m sorry you feel that way; let me get her.”

I went and got the store manager. She told the customer the same thing I had, and he told us we were wrong and we would find out when he called corporate. He bought his items and paid tax, and we loaded his items, and he acted all nice and said he wouldn’t have had to give us a hard time if we would’ve just listened and done it his way.

A Taxing Customer, Part 2
A Taxing Customer

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