I work as a receptionist at a chiropractic office, and part of my job is to show patients into empty rooms. I’ve just cleared out one room for a patient and am taking the next one in. The patient who just left used perhaps a bit too much perfume, but overall, not an unpleasant amount. The one coming in is drenched in stale cigarette smoke.

Patient: “WOW! Think she used a little too much perfume there?”

Me: *Trying not to gag on the lingering cigarette smoke.* “Well….it’s more pleasant than some of the smells we get in here…”

I work at a medical clinic which also offers small cosmetic surgeries, and at this time, I was working at the front desk.

Before a surgery, we need patients to fill out a pre-operative questionnaire, where we also ask for permission to start CPR in case something happens (which never happens).

This lady, eighty-one years old, starts throwing a huge fit about how she suddenly has to think about this life-saving stuff, and if we want her to die, that we have really confronted her with death… and for surgeries in other hospitals, they have never asked her about this.

Meanwhile, we were super busy and really understaffed, so it was just me, my colleague, and ten other patients listening to this lady rant for fifteen minutes. In the end, she just threw the paper over the desk and stormed off, saying that maybe now she doesn’t want the surgery anymore.

She wanted an eyelift surgery.

I used to live in a rural area of Australia. We got a new young doctor in the local medical centre who was from Sydney.

Me: *Hobbling into the centre.* “Any chance I could get a quick looksie at my foot? Broke my little toe.”

Doctor: “How do you know you broke it?”

Me: “I’ve broken it before. I know what it feels like.”

Doctor: *Excitedly.* “Maybe it was a spider bite? Or gout?”

Me: *In pain and low on patience.* “Because I was in my f****** body at the time and not astral plane-ing or some s***.”

Doctor: *Disappointed.* “Fine.”

Later, during the examination:

Doctor: “Yeah, I suppose it might be broken.”

Me: “You sure it’s not gout symptoms spontaneously occurring only on my little toe right as I dropped something on it?” 

I got my painkiller, and my mood improved considerably. I came by a week later to apologise and even brought the doctor and nurses some chocolates. The nurse told me it was fine, and he finally got to treat an “exotic spider bite” a few days earlier, which made him very happy.

Many years ago, I worked for an office running Medicaid for the state I’m in. Most of the submitted claims were scanned in and automated, which was fine, but sometimes this led to amusing situations like the following. I tried to summarize it to remove the unnecessary details.

Me: *Answering phone.* “Thank you for calling. How may I help you?”

Caller: “Yes, we received an explanation of benefits and think there may have been a pretty hefty mistake made.”

Me: *Bracing myself for the inevitable yelling, as this never is a good start.* “Sure, what’s the claim number so I can look it up?”

They give it to me, and I pull up the file, not immediately seeing anything suspicious.

Caller: “If you look at this, we were paid for 100 units of this service, but it should have been 1.00; the decimal was left out.”

Me: “Ah, okay, let me make some notes and get this straightened out.”

Caller: “If this caller had 100 of these done on that day, I really feel sorry for him.”

Me: *Now curious.* “Oh? Let me see what it was…”

I proceed to pull up details of the claim and immediately have to fight back laughter.

Caller: “No patient, ever, wants to have more than one colonoscopy done in a single day.” *Quietly laughs.*

Me: *Trying to maintain my professionalism.* “All I can say is ouch… Anyways, I have noted the error, we’ll start the paperwork to get it corrected.”

I proceed to end the call as quickly as possible before I crack up laughing. Patient, whoever you were, I really hope you had a lot of ice packs and padding to sit on after that horrifying day of a hundred colonoscopies.

I simply do not know how some people stay in business treating patients as badly as they do.

In April of 2025, I had an appointment at a dermatology office, as my primary would like me to do these yearly, yet I’ve only done so one other time in my life. I’m working on being better.

When I called, they knew I was a new patient. They asked about my insurance but asked me no other questions. I arrived early/on time and filled out the paperwork, and then I waited forty-five minutes to be brought into the back.

Intake Person: “What are you here for?”

Me: “My doctor wanted me to get looked over as part of my yearly physical.”

Intake Person: “Oh, then you needed to book an appointment beforehand so that the time, which will be thirty minutes, could be booked out.”

Me: “How am I supposed to know this? The receptionist should have asked that, as she knew I was a new patient.”

Intake Person: “Well, yes, but she didn’t, and I’m going to have to make you an appointment. I noticed that there is time tomorrow.”

Me: “Today, I had to wait forty-five minutes. Will I be seen when I get in?”

Intake Person: “Yes, I see that tomorrow we will be fully staffed. Today we are not, which is why there was a wait.”

So, I made another appointment for 10:30 the next morning. I arrived at 10:25… and waited until 10:42, when I asked if I was going to be seen soon. After another couple of minutes, I was called back. I put on the gown… and waited. After another ten minutes, I poked my head out and asked what was going on, and I was told that if I couldn’t wait, they could make me another appointment. I told them NO, if I wasn’t seen in five minutes, I’d find another dermatologist.

Five minutes later… the doctor came in. I don’t remember what I said specifically, but it did revolve around the fact that I’d been made to wait thirty minutes.

Doctor: “We do have other patients.”

Me: “Goodbye. I’m not doing this.”

Doctor: “Okay.”

Me: “I also expect my money back.”

I had to pay a copay the day before.

Doctor: “Yes, you will get that back.”

I left.

Yes, doctor, you have other patients. I do expect that you have other patients; otherwise, you’d not be a doctor’s office. This is why you have appointment times, as well. Your attitude and lack of respect toward your patients are why I am not going to be a patient of yours.